I have a young daughter and I have been seperated from her father for almost three years. He as not paid anything in child support and now is talking about joint custody so he doesnt have to pay!I have been reading some books and they seem to say that with him not paying child support at all it may be hard for him to get joint custody is this true?
2007-03-03 05:29:21 · 7 answers · asked by rere 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sorry hon, this is a little bit tricky.
The court tends to view child support, visitation, and custody as totally different issues - basically in their eyes one doesn't have anything to do with or have any affect on the others.
Abandonment is a completely different story - you need to document during the 3 years (to the best of your ability) what his visitation has been like - has he made a point to spend time with your daughter on a regular basis or has he pretty much walked away? Also, if you feel that he is a bad/negligent parent, document specific instances with details to support it. You need to get your divorce going and file for sole custody. If there is any way at all that you can afford it, find out who your local attorney is that represents children's services in their cases on behalf of the children. This is the attorney you want. Do everything he/she tells you to do. If there are parenting classes the court recommends, take them promptly and don't say anything to your ex about it. You need to show yourself as the one who should be he sole care-taker of your child. You need your attorney to be able to show why he is not right for joint custody.
The good news is that if he gets joint custody, he still has to pay child support. I think he is confusing child support with spousal support. Once divorced he may not have to pay support for you, but will have to pay for his child NO MATTER WHAT. A 3 year separation is too long - you need to file and let the legal system step in.
2007-03-03 06:07:05 · answer #1 · answered by Mrs. Goddess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's true. If he doesn't spent time with her that's worse for him too. But it has to be in the court records. In other words, if he has been ordered by the court to pay and has not that looks very bad for him. If, on the other hand, you have no formal arrangement and have not gone to court then it could well be your word against his. That would likely not be enough to sway a judge when it comes to matters of custody.
I don't understand why he hasn't paid anything, though, unless he is unemployed and has no wages to garnish. Three years is a long time. Have you petitioned the court to retrive support? Is there a child support order in place? If not, you need to get that done because not doing so puts him in a position of power. I know it's a pain, but it's for your child. Frankly I think parents who don't pay and force the other parent to run after them and spend all that time in court should have to pay a penalty to that parent. It's just not right that you have to do all the child-rearing and spend time running after him as well.
Get it all on record with the court, that way there is no dispute.
With a father like that I thank God this child has you. Stay strong hon. That way your child can grow up strong too, and know he/she had a mother who sacrificed and struggled to make two parent out of one.
Good luck.
2007-03-03 05:49:45 · answer #2 · answered by Eris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It should be, and you should ensure back monies before you even consider joint custody. If isn't paying anything, then he gets to have his cake and eat it too. Don't believe that the woman always gets custody, that's not true. Each case is considered carefully in court. He probably figures if he gets joint custody he can have her and still not pay.Talk to your attorney.
2007-03-03 05:40:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The custody arrangement is for the child. The support arrangement is with you. Two separate issues. If he is in violation with a payment order, you should see that it is enforced. If he otherwise has a good relationship with the child, then that is good for the child and you should support that.
Children do much better when their divorced parents get along.
2007-03-03 05:42:13 · answer #4 · answered by Campo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go to Juvemile court and slap a child support summons on his as* and if you are not married to him then it will be hard to do unless you agree to it but i would fight him..
2007-03-03 05:38:20 · answer #5 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u can have him arriested for not paying. and the women always gets the kids. joint cousdy is good. he still has to pay a little.
2007-03-03 05:34:59 · answer #6 · answered by lisaanndubay 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes it might be but he is entitled to the same rights as you are. I f he was ordered and didnot pay slam him in jail they don't give kids to people in jail.
2007-03-03 05:46:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋