I have a question ... say 2 young adults feel that they love each and are compatible to get married ... and both have huge career aspirations in more or less the same fields ... is it okay to get married now and be married throughout college but not necessarily have to provide for ourselves (parents help instead) ...? either way he wants me to come live with him but we go to college in different states so I can't, at least not now .. what do you guys think?
2007-03-02 23:29:07 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thank you all for your very thorough and informative answers. I think as most of you said, if it's truly meant to be, a little time in between won't hurt at all.
2007-03-02 23:49:57 · update #1
if you're ready, YOU'RE READY.... but dont let this stop you from accomplishing your dreams, you need to continue schooling and if this means going to another state to school, do it. do you two consider having kids. dont let it pressure you, if he really loves you, he'll let you finish schooling and wait...
2007-03-02 23:35:06 · answer #1 · answered by *grid_iron gurl* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a really bad idea. I mean you are so young, you will most definitely NOT be the same person in 5 years, let a lone 10. What is the rush? If you love each-other and you are sure about each-other than there is no reason to rush marriage. If it is meant to be he will still be there in 4 years when you are done with school. You need to live on your own before you get married. You should not go from your parents house to your husbands house. When do you have time to find you? You will be missing out on so many experiences that you will never get back. What kind of wedding would you have now? A quicky thing, it would be so much nicer if you waited a little while and could plan the wedding of your dreams. I know that is a material thing but it is still something you would be missing out on. I am not saying that it can not work, it can but you have to try so much harder than if you wait a few more years.
2007-03-03 08:55:35 · answer #2 · answered by chanajane3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a REALLY bad idea. First of all, you simply cannot believe the amount of change that is going to happen when you go to college. You will grow mentally, emotionally, maybe physically. You'll meet so many people and unless you're some kind of hermit, both of you will meet people that you're interested in. Besides, you're WAY too young to get married. You go to college to get your education, have some fun, maybe party a little, date a bunch of people and get some life experiences, sow your wild oats so to speak. You're kidding yourself if you think he won't be looking at other girls.
I don't mean to rain on your parade but you're not thinking straight here. DO NOT get married just yet. You're WAY too young. That doesn't mean ditch this guy or stop caring but you need to wait. If it works out, then it works out but marriage should be forever and you don't want to start out your marriage apart, with a LOT of temptation all around both of you.
For Gods' sake, wait.
2007-03-03 07:38:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. You aren't the people you are going to be for the rest of your lives before you are 20, before college. Statistically, the longer you wait to get married (ideal is late 20's), the better your chances of a lasting, happy marriage. If it is meant to be, you will both still be there after college. Email, video clips, chat rooms make it very easy to stay in touch while you are away.
And, you absolutely should not get married while your parents are still supporting you. Being married is about sharing your lives, being independent and adult/grown up. To do anything else but do it right doesn't respect what it is.
2007-03-03 07:33:30 · answer #4 · answered by suzykew70 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would think that while you cannot live together you should wait to get married. I have nothing against getting married young as I married my husband when I was 19 and he was 20, but I think that having to live in different states would create way too many problems. If your love is so strong then it will wait till you can really be together.
2007-03-03 07:32:53 · answer #5 · answered by auburn 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Adult, only in the Eyes of The Law. But not in the Ways of Life. There's much too much, going on, around? For anyone to know about Life, at that age. Be careful. Many don't make the cut? Purely because they think they have all of the answers.
2007-03-03 07:32:40 · answer #6 · answered by Goggles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally im only 17 but im in love with a girl whos 16 and i would have no problem getting maried to her at any time. however you realy cant expect someone else to fully understand your situation. Marige is a big thing, and you should only go throughwith it if you truly think you can spend the rest of your life withhim. as fir the college. id say ask your parents. because there is no telling weather or not they will or wont help you unless you ask. and if he loves you, he can wait a little while for you to live with him. you have to go to college too if you want to reach your goals, he cant expect you to give them up just to live in his house.
2007-03-03 07:33:40 · answer #7 · answered by osuthefox353 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm 17 years old. I live alone with my boyfriend because of a complicated family situation. I dated him for two years, and he is my best friend. I recommend living with him first. Live with him for say, six months, maybe nine. You will never know who he really is until you live with him, and spend 24/7 with him. Living together is the true test. If your relationship can stand that, get married. That is what will make you happy, and your family and friends will be happy in turn.
2007-03-03 07:33:30 · answer #8 · answered by XyControl 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
if you have to ask if your`e too young to get married, then you are too young to get married... if you have to ask strangers if its okay to get married, then its not okay to get married yet...wait a couple of years...grow up a little.... wisen up a little... like wine, age a little... and after a few years when you feel the same way towards each other ( and you dont have to ask strangers on the internet if you should get married ) them by all means tie the knot !
a professor of mine back in med school used to say " youth... its wasted on the young... wisdom... its wasted on the old... "
2007-03-03 07:36:10 · answer #9 · answered by Clive Roland 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chronological age is not as significant as emotional age.
We got married at 21, but we had the relative maturity that helped the relationship survive.
2007-03-03 10:23:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If two people love each other, age should never be an issue as to getting married; good idea or bad idea.
2007-03-03 07:33:00 · answer #11 · answered by Louise Smith 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋