Is it worth staying with a man that you believe doesn't love you and is only staying for his daughter? (been nearly 3 yrs already)
2007-03-02 22:53:27 · 12 answers · asked by cheerful_kitty 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I'm in the same situation. So hard. You want to do the best thing for your daughter- she loves her dad, she'd only miss him if you both left. I tried to persuade my other 1/2 to consider moving into separate accommodation nearby, she our child could spend time with both of us, but he wants to live abroad.
Luckily we don't argue often so at least she's not caught up in that. But it's not enough knowing YOU are shrivelling up inside, being unappreciated & under-valued.
There is no easy answer!
If you can't reach a happy decision, maybe thing's will blow up & the decision will be made for you?
I don't know how old your child is, but is she old enough to be involved in the discussions / decisions re: who she would rather live with? Kids often pick up the vibes & you may find your child already realises...
The one thing I would recommend, is COMMUNICATE your feelings to HIM! It may all be a MISUNDERSTANDING??
2007-03-03 04:47:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its only worth it if you live together as happily married parents because anything short of this will certainly compromise your childs long term psycological wellbeing which also means compromising the reason for staying together in the first instance.
Other choices your child will have are to endure a serparation and shared custody including fostering to seperate families as you both progress into other relationships
OR
Endure living in a house with both parents in separate rooms arguing and fighting with possible abuse and separate lives including different partners anyway.
If your childs welfare is paramount and not yours or your partners then each stage into the family should be assessed and addressed at each stage to best suit the child and to lesson the impact it will have on her i.e. stay together so your daughter can have a balance of both mom and dad: separate and share custody should any negativity from the relationship threaten her wellbeing.
Let love, caring and sharing be the focus for her
2007-03-02 23:40:21 · answer #2 · answered by Truth D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but the answer is very subjective.
You asked, 'is it worth' ....what is the 'worth,' the value of being there, and what is the alternatives you have got listed for all three of you?
Because you do not believe him and do not feel loved, then the act of separation is likely to do / change what? And how will this affect your daughter? ~ or How will staying together affect your daughter?
It's a difficult position to be in (as far as I'm concerned), and one I'd hate because of a child being at the centre of it all.
The best answer I can think of is for you to seek impartial support from where to make your choices.
Good luck.
Sash.
2007-03-03 09:03:14 · answer #3 · answered by sashtou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he's been honest and told you he doesn't love you then no things wont get better, if you just believe he doesn't and he hasn't said any thing maybe he's just going through a hard time at the minute and is shutting you out while trying to cope, the best thing you can do is ask him and tell him how you feel
2007-03-02 22:59:31 · answer #4 · answered by angie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you love him?
Do you love the little girl?
Its a hard question to answer because there are alot of things to take into account.....
2007-03-02 22:58:23 · answer #5 · answered by Sask 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how old`s your daughter?
If theres bad feeling between you thats no good to anyone in the relationship including your daughter , have you thought about councelling
2007-03-02 23:06:43 · answer #6 · answered by Dorian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends what's your priority of life... is it yourself or your daughetr
if its good for your daughter that he stays with you guys, and you can sacrifice for her, then go for it and continue living with him... meanwhile try to gain his love again.. it works
if he's no good for your daughter or you cannot sacrifice for her... then let him go.. or let yourself go.. there'll be many more better men for you out there...
2007-03-02 23:17:44 · answer #7 · answered by sighspy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well its not the best basis to base a relationship but if things are cool between you then why worry
2007-03-02 23:02:00 · answer #8 · answered by dream theatre 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, if he is a rich one and is providing extremely prosperous life style for u and your daughter
2007-03-02 23:04:39 · answer #9 · answered by jacky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not really.You can lost a battle but there is a war continuous
2007-03-03 00:03:59 · answer #10 · answered by Atila a 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋