Has anyone killed a workmate and claimed mental torture as a defence?

Question

I've been at work since 7am keeping a low profile as I smell of beer. I would rather be crawling naked over broken glass than be here. The woman I work with is far too happy at her work, singing and being generally far too cheerful. I wish to kill her. Even if i don't any suggestions on how to do it would be most welcome and at least keep me going for the next few hours.

FLORENCE SO VERY CUTTING LOL

DIANE B IF I WAS PLANNING A MURDER WOULD I BE ON HERE ASKING FOR ADVICE ON HOW TO CARRY IT OUT. PERHAPS YOU'RE AS DAFT AS I LOOK

Answer 1

sneak under her desk and staple her feet to the floor.
then superglue her eyelids shut and put bluetac in her ears.
then phone up george w bush and tell him she's hiding wmd's (and oil)
he will send an elite task force called the a-team to dispatch of your work colleague in a terrible manner. (no doubt involving light aircraft,cigars and a shed full of tools)

Answer 2

you want suggestions - ok here they are

1. try not pitching up to work pissed - that's always a good start
2. have you ever tried crawling over broken glass? oh wait - by the sound of you, you probably might in the near future egged on and encouraged by your knuckle dragging beer 'buds'
3. Give the poor woman a break - confronted with you, the living recreation of the thing from the black lagoon - maybe she's in a happy place to avoid reality
4. By asking this question you are committing an offence - I'm sure your local constabulary would love to have you in for a chat and maybe a custodial sentence
5. Should you decide to 'kill her' - the broken glass option would be a doddle compared to the slopping your own sh*t and urine every morning and learning to 'love' your cellmate
6. MacDonalds always have vacancies for people of your obvious talent and calibre

Answer 3

properly, a number of them have been babies, so i visit anticipate they have been harmless. As for the adults who have been killed, they did not reason the catastrophe that killed them; it particularly is what some human beings call an act of God (and that i prefer to call act of nature). i assume it particularly is achievable that some ex-cons must be between the victims, yet we don't understand that. the two way, no person merits to die like that. The tragedy in Oklahoma replace into unavoidable and, as tornadoes tend to be, unpredictable. an analogous is real of typhoon Sandy, in spite of the reality that hurricanes are a lot extra predictable, yet all you're able to do is watch and wait. The tragedy in Boston--properly, maybe that would have been stopped, yet regulation enforcement isn't suited. The tragedy in West, Texas, certainly would have been prevented, however the owner replace into taking part in speedy and loose with regulations and in all probability did not care that the production facility replace into almost a bomb that hadn't been lit yet. yet all of us grieve on the shortcoming of existence because of the fact till and except all of us understand extra concerning to the victims, we anticipate they don't seem to be undesirable human beings.

Answer 4

crawl over the glass instead.
or try to get her in a bad mood

Answer 5

My "friend" killed his entire office, which he was quite right to do, as they were very common and all smelt of cheese. He changed his name, fled to another state and was never caught.

Answer 6

Sorry mate, its your own fault. A hang over is a self-inflicted injury ! Get rat-arsed again tonight & you'll forget all about her...

Answer 7

There's certainly someone I'd like to do that to, but I avoid it since I don't think I'd enjoy prison much.

Answer 8

I think your avatar classifies as mental torture

Answer 9

If you undress right down to the state you are in on your avaitor. I can GUARANTEE you she will GO home.

Answer 10

You need not say anything. Your avatar speaks for itself.