my husband aslo has a very soft corner for them he blames himself and feels guilty about the present unsettled status of his 1st family.what should i do.do i leave him to let him live in peace or do i stand by him in this time of crisis.my husbad stays with me and not with his 1st family
2007-03-02 18:10:03 · 15 answers · asked by Magpie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you are his wife, you should stand by him, for better or for worse.
2007-03-02 18:12:56 · answer #1 · answered by Dr Dee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing makes a man feel more secure in his marriage, than a woman who stands squarely beside him. Neither he, nor you, can have much effect on what occurs in his ex-wifes home. The important thing is to show the same love for all of the children, when they are in your home. Provide as stable and nurturing environment as you possible can, within you home, and you will be acting in the children's best interest. Your support of your husband may help him with his feelings that he would like to do more. Let him know how proud you are of his living up to his responsibilities of being a father, to all of his children. Encourage him to concentrate on his successes, and, don't dwell on those things over which you have no control. Every father wishes he could do more for his kids. Stand firm, and, hang onto the man you love. He is lucky to have a woman who would put his needs before her own. But, don't break up one home, in the effort to same another. Your place is by your husband's side.
Good luck and God Bless!
2007-03-02 18:39:23 · answer #2 · answered by Pastor Jeff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u say ur husband has a soft corner for his first family and he feels guilty too about what he has done.
so i am sure it is him who has to ( who will make his decision ultimatley irrespective of ur wish in all probability) make a decision about with whom to stay for the rest of his life. isn't it?
do u really believe tht he is gonna be wth u till the end? already he seems to be wavering.
so the soft corner and the guilt may tilt the scales in favour of his first family.
so may be it is better tht u first make ur position about ur future clear as u also have a child by him.
u can gv him moral support if u feel he is in a crisis.
but u must think of ur's and ur child's future too...and make things clear with ur husband as to what he wants to do.
ur husband definitely has a responsibilty towards u and ur child.just bcz u r nt the legal wife it doesn't mean tht he can simply desert u.
good luck for taking the right decision.god bless u.
2007-03-02 18:27:13 · answer #3 · answered by ☆| raji |☆ says let's make life beautiful! 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, it doesn't sound good that he feels guilty, because it's you and your child he's feeling guilty about! it would be best for you to take your child and leave. it sounds like he would rather be with his first wife and children and feels that he made a mistake by being with you.
I know it may sound kind of harsh, but going on what you've said, he wants to be with his 1st family.
Best Wishes
2007-03-02 18:38:23 · answer #4 · answered by atiana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He does have a duty to his first family, more importantly to his children. You need to give him space and let him do what he needs to do. It is a balancing act because he also needs to be there for you and your child. You are in a difficult situation that affects a lot of people and you just need to be patient and supportive.
2007-03-02 18:25:25 · answer #5 · answered by Serinity4u2find 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Future of his 1st wife & all the children ,yours and and first wife, is perfectlt secure. It is now you who have to decide what will you do and what does you want in rest of your life.
Decision dependes upon your finnacil & social security. What he is worried about is must to know and is irt necessary that your leaving him is must. so there are many questions which i do not think that we can discusse in open public form.
let us discusse it directly. if you wish to do so.
you can contact me through this site
2007-03-02 22:02:14 · answer #6 · answered by Divya J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're saying unlawful wife, so you're not his wife really and you have no right to keep him away from his real family...your child has rights from his father.
Anyway, you should let him be, obviously he still is attached to his family and he will never leave them so why waste your time with him...live your life and raise your child and try to meet someone who is single .
2007-03-02 18:33:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm no longer religious, yet I do have heavy sociological / anthropological historic past. in case you experience the favor to "worry" your God, then it truly is because you experience to blame for something, or you want to experience victimized. maximum individuals do not worry their God. They love their God. God is like the perfect chief. As Machiavelli stated, a reliable chief could be both loved and feared. If he's only loved, then human beings will nonetheless do what they prefer hostile to his needs at cases. If he's only feared, then they gained't love their own lives, in reality doing what he needs out of worry of ramifications. in the journey that they love and worry him, then they are going to do what he needs out of affection and recognize first, and out of worry 2d. enable me attempt to apply a diverse analogy for God... God, in maximum peoples' eyes, is type of a reliable parent. a reliable parent makes use of two aspects love and a million area discipline to verify human beings lead a reliable existence. a million area love is unconditional. God loves you unconditionally, because you're his creation. (only as a parent loves their baby unconditionally). a million area love is for efficient reinforcement. God shows you want to advantages your reliable habit. that is what maximum individuals call "advantages", "miracles", etc. father and mom do an identical with them babies; supply them hugs even as they prevail. a million area discipline is used for detrimental reinforcement. God punishes human beings even as they have been undesirable. father and mom do an identical to babies. Now, maximum folk will persist with a Godly existence because they recognize and love God using at least a million area unconditional love, and a million area efficient reinforcement. If that would not artwork then they worry the a million area discipline. besides the undeniable fact that, what's "blessing" and "punishment" from God is subjective. diverse religions, or maybe persons, may even see something as a blessing even as others see it as a curse. easily everyone can see regardless of the truth that they prefer into something. even as a mom hugs a baby, it truly is rather tangible that it truly is a hug. yet, even as someone unearths $5 on the line is that a blessing? What if it only facilitates them to do something undesirable? i imagine the more suitable positive thanks to ascertain God is that he provides human beings possibilities. The $5 is a threat. How the guy chooses to apply that threat dictates even if it truly is a "blessing" or "curse".
2016-12-05 04:29:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The temptation to leave when there is trouble is great isn't it?. That's the priority of the mistress. Try it.
2007-03-03 03:31:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're ridiculous.... You are definately NOT his wife.... "unlawful" or otherwise. LOL!!!
You're nothing more than a chick that he cheated with and got pregnant...oops...
Move on.... Not sure what you think of yourself but if you need an explaination of what you SHOULD, just holla....
2007-03-02 18:15:04 · answer #10 · answered by ~Me~ 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
sounds like theres a lot of time between you and his first. you should let him finish his affairs legally with the first then marry him officially if that's what you both want.....be careful if he wont legally end his first.
2007-03-02 18:22:41 · answer #11 · answered by tryinthis2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋