Eyes are drifting off.
The memory is fading.
The voices become silent.
Light begins to change into darkness.
The sun goes to bed and the moon arises.
Bright light shining down.
Casting an everlasting glow
Upon the world of the lost and lonely.
The sky cries
And the wind howls.
Green leaved trees shudder
The air bitter and crisp
An serene and melancholy melody
Whispers through the night
Singing a soft lullaby to the dreamers.
2007-03-02 14:04:50 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Music
Wow, it's really not bad. I'm a Literature major (yeah, like THAT makes me some kind of authority on the subject, psh!) and I really liked the ending. You might want to play around a little bit with the first part. Some of it is cliche. Use a simile to change the light into dark. Remember (especially with poetry) show, don't tell. The last part though is absolutely excellent. "Green leaved trees shudder, the air bitter and crisp." Great imagery!
2007-03-02 14:11:35 · answer #1 · answered by Sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! Really Really descriptive. Best poem i have EVER heard. Wow you can write literature!
2007-03-02 22:13:21 · answer #2 · answered by purple.yellow.jello.is.love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's okay. Not great but not bad at all. You paint a nice picture. Keep it up!
2007-03-02 22:11:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't really like poems,but i loved this 1!
2007-03-02 22:13:56 · answer #4 · answered by dallascowgirl1001 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
pretty cool
2007-03-02 22:08:52 · answer #5 · answered by fugazi48 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like it. :]]
2007-03-02 22:10:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its nice ;-)
2007-03-02 22:14:18 · answer #7 · answered by Norman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋