The main component of a serious sucessful relationship is. . I think. . compatibility. But how compatable can you really be with someone who disagrees with most if not all of your points of view? Isin't better to be with someone who you can count on to always be in your corner, or does the enevitable conflict bring about it's own reward? What do you think? Tell Matticus he WANTS to KNOW.
2007-03-02 13:36:50 · 11 answers · asked by Matticus Kole 4 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
it really comes down to just finding someone who can compromise or to be with someone who is laid back & doesn't disagree about all the little things. i'm engaged to my complete opposite, but we're openminded and do everything we can to make the other one happy. he doesn't agree with very much of anything that i feel is right. in the end, it doesn't matter. you just have to find someone who is willing to be there no matter what.
2007-03-02 14:13:04 · answer #1 · answered by fiore 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Opposites do attract but there can be conflict.
My husband and I are complete oposites but have been married for 30 years. While we have problems like anyone else the fact that he is different than me helps such as in our arguments. He is passive and I am agressive.
Now, could you imagine if we were both agressive, the relationship would be doomed.
You can have disagreements as long as you meet in the middle.
One wants to vacation at the Beach the other Camping. Meet in the middle and do a little of both or Camp at the Beach. It is all give and take. If one keeps taking the other might as well be a puppet and give up.
You need compatability, and similar VALUES. I cant stress that enough. If one loves to pary and the other one does not, one likes to drink and the other one doesnt, one loves to spend money and the other one is more frugal, one loves friends the other does not want friends, one is ourtgoing and the other is a homebody, one wants kids the other says none, one believes in God the other is Atheist and so on. You must make sure the Majority of your Values match, if they dont you are destined for failure.
This does not mean you will always agree on things in life but it will mean that you can actually have a real future together. Too many people marry with the HEART OR HEAD and not both.
Think about that. It is important to use your Heart (and Love the person) and your Head (that you match) together.
My son made this mistake. And even though I counsel I had to stand by and watch him make a huge mistake (he had enough of Moms advice). He has been married only two years and is divorcing after getting a "Dear John letter" in Iraq, he is in the Army. He married her with his heart. If he would have used his head he would have seen she was selfish, self-centered, dominated by her mother, immature and more. Now he has learn his lesson in life.
We all have lessons to learn. But a relationship is one of the most important thing you do in life. Why not, spend adequate time getting to know each other and talking enough about the future.
2007-03-02 13:56:38 · answer #2 · answered by Nevada Pokerqueen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who's to say what works. What might work for one does not work for the other. I've known couples that are complete opposites and are great together while other couples that share the same likes are miserable. I believe it is good to have your differences. That way, there is always something new you can learn from each other. Besides, part of the excitement of a relationship is discovering your better half. :)
2007-03-02 13:53:35 · answer #3 · answered by VYPERMS 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Rarely. The novelty wears off, the quirks and peculiarities loom larger, become annoying. Big difference between 'attracting' versus 'growing together.' And look at all the forces that stress the best of relationships without planting the bad seed from the get-go.
2007-03-02 13:55:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Opposite doesn't necessarily mean in opinions.
My husband and I are opposites (I think)-- we have very different views on a lot of things, we have different interests,etc.
I do think there are certain issues you need to agree upon, such as whether you should have children.
I always thought of that saying as meaning, if two people grow up differently, then there is so much they can teach each other.
2007-03-02 14:08:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has always said that they never saw two people as different as My wife and I. We seem to have the polar opposite opinion about almost everything.
I love her and She loves me and we have been doing this now for over 40 years. I think the key may be respect. I may not always agree with her but I respect her views and love her just the way that she is.
Love and blessings Don
2007-03-03 02:20:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, sorry. there's no standard equation to this. just case to case results. besides, it's not just "compatibility" per se that makes the relationship last. there are many other components and they should meld, if not to make up for the arguments. though really, it's between two people. it would be unfair to judge your chances by just one question.
2007-03-02 14:13:16 · answer #7 · answered by ficklefeather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that a healthy relationship consists of two people who have their differences, but still agree on things. I believe that opposites do not always attract, but semi-opposites do.
2007-03-02 13:43:28 · answer #8 · answered by Eyelinerislife 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's different for every relationship, it all depends on how to the people want to work for their relationship and make it last.
2007-03-02 13:44:34 · answer #9 · answered by Linds 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
compatability is important. and your right, it would be difficult for people with completly opsing views to truey conect. but, some different views can keep the relasionship interesting, meaningfull, and spontainious.
2007-03-02 14:03:32 · answer #10 · answered by Alysse 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋