I have been talking to the same man now for 2 1/2 yrs over the internet and phone. We talk everyday all day until all hours of the night. I do not think that there is anything i have not shared with him. He is even ok that i am a single mother of 3 kids. I have true deep feelings for him, but am scared to meet him, for fear of bursting my hopes, and scared becuz of my kids. But, it has been over two yrs... does anyone think its safe, am i being paranoid... just need some advice.
2007-03-02 12:56:43 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Its possible that he could be a nice guy...i am usually very cautious and it was completely out of character for me but i fell in love with a man we were together for about 2 years and we talked on the fone for hours and hours and for another year after that just to be on the safe side we talked on the fone...and then because for personal reasons he couldnt come to my country i told my brother and 2 other ppl where and when i am going and gave every last detail incase my judegemnt about this guy was wrong....but from the bottom of my heart i was confident that this guy was for me...i took a plane from UK to San Diego and he met me there.....on xmas day ...5 days later we were engaged and have *touchwood* been happily married for 4 years now!!
but pls dont think that just cos my story was successful that you should relax....you have to make sure of your safety....i knew some friends in sand diego who were aware of where i will be and that i may need them to come and get me at some point if i am in need of help.....you also have children...i didnt...dynamics change if kids are involved....he has not had to interact with them, take responsibility for them....understand them and their needs etc...it will take time....if i were you and you really wanted to meet with him then make sure you let ppl know when and where and what time you are expected back....i would recommend that bcos kids are involved here that u test him out in real life for some time before involving your kids into the relationship.....keep him at arms length....things are very different when you meet in person...on the phone and net everything can sound and be perfect...but if there is no chemistry when you meet in person then your relationship wont last long.
im sorry for sounding negative...but although i got lucky (verrrrry lucky) i dont want to tell you that its safe and okay to just meet the guy and life becomes all hunkeydorey....it can get pretty serious if you have indeed found a psycho who has trapped you!
so for your own saftey and for the safety of your kids....make sure you test him and check him out very carefully before making your decision.
good luck and i hope that you are as lucky as i am!
God bless!
2007-03-02 13:11:37 · answer #1 · answered by Jia K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're great,I'm a single mom of 3 kids too! i know of a friend who did the same,she talked to this person from the U.S.,shared almost everything and even got the point that they're gonna marry one day.. somehow it did give her a feeling of being loved,cared for,and listened to..but as they've come to know each other more and more,she realized she's being lied at..like the true age of that man,and that he is divorced and has a kid..i mean,those things he revealed later are not really harmful to the relationship had he revealed it at the start..something that my friend got so damn scared of..what if there's so much more he lied about?what if he was just trying to play with her emotions?later on my friend realized that she needed somebody she could physically feel,touch,and talk to...well,i guess it's case to case basis..i hope the situation i cited will somehow help you and enlighten you..at the end of the day,you get to decide for yourself..*wink*
2007-03-02 13:33:42 · answer #2 · answered by sexy_mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
always be careful with men whom you never met before. its not the time how long you have been holding the relationship even if it happens to meet him in person but its very important that you get to know about him the way he is in his daily general behaviour. for this you can let him undergo few tests with which it may be helpful to know his honesty and being truthful to you(caution never let him know about this at any circumstances). you can also think of the various incidents that took place between you and him and the way he responded during those situations. but according to me once a guy gets committed he never leaves the girl what so ever it may lead to all through the life. but on the other side the honest truth is that you both may trust each other still you keep suspecting each other and still continue to hold the relationship. as last word only a personal experience will help to know what kind of a person is your partner through various experiences. i wish you all the success. Cheers!!
2007-03-02 13:15:27 · answer #3 · answered by lapd 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is okay if you have fallen inlove with the guy you hav'nt met but of course you have to think first, you dont know the person's real intention. Take the courage to meet him, and if you feel that your first meeting is good then meet him often to get to know each other better. That way, you can see if you two really are for each other. Be careful of your feelings because it may destroy you and your family. You have to use your mind first. Ok? And be sure to be beautiful in your first eyeball ok?
2007-03-02 13:12:15 · answer #4 · answered by Lizeth 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is okay to meet him in person it has been 2years just meet him someplace public if you are concerned and just talk to him like you do over the phone you will be fine you owe it to yourself, your a mom of 3 {and I'm sure your great} just take a deep breath and go for it
2007-03-02 13:02:25 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you know everything about him, as he does about you, if you've seen a picture of him, you know where he lives and works, you phone him at home, I don't know why you'd be worried about meeting him. Just make sure it's in a safe place the first time with back up if you want to leave.
2007-03-02 13:00:29 · answer #6 · answered by Pegasus 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Daffynition"
Chatfatuation: The infatuation with the persona portrayed by another chatter despite the realization that you have never heard their voice or seen their face and that 19 yr old hottie might be a 50 yr old gay.
(in the case of the woman being infatuated with a male persona.. that supposed 23 yr old "buff" millionaire might be a 450 lb 4'5" guy with no teeth and $90,000 in debts.)
2007-03-02 13:02:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah, I fell in love over the internet, then when I learned more about him I fell right back out!
2007-03-02 13:00:33 · answer #8 · answered by Bud's Girl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if you do decide to meet him do it in public for a while till he gains your trust and you can tell if he's true or fake. SO be carefull
2007-03-02 13:12:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I fell in love with a BOT once...but the relationship's growth was stunted when all she wanted was for me to visit her adult-paysite.
2007-03-02 13:27:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋