Ok....So there's this guy and he likes me right. He asked me to date him and I love him as a friend and care about him a lot, but he had a drug problem. He says he quit, but I'm not sure if he's lying or not. I'm afriad to get into that relationship, but I don't want to hurt him. Please help me.
2007-03-02 10:09:56 · 14 answers · asked by gurly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
dont please anyone but yourself
2007-03-02 10:13:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with him. Tell him your reservations and ask him how you know if he is telling you the truth. Also use your own judgement. Do you really feel that you can trust him? Has he changed his circle of friends since he stopped doing drugs. If he hasn't then he could easily get back into it. More than likely his old friend did drugs if he did. If you feel comfortable with it give it a try but let him know up front that if you even think that he is or find out that he started again you will be gone from his life. Stay open and make sure you communicate and talk about it all.
2007-03-02 10:15:50 · answer #2 · answered by vancie121 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be up front with the guy and tell him why you're having reservations. Tell him that all relationships are built on trust, and that you have to be able to believe that he is off of the drugs.
Give him a chance. You could be the motivation that he needs to stay off of drugs. Ultimately, he's the one that's going to make the decision to do them or not.
Let him know that you'll give him the benefit of the doubt, and date him. If he abuses the trust you've put into him, you'll walk away from the "dating" aspect of your relationship.
If those terms are unsatisfactory to him, then he's telling you that he has intentions of doing drugs in the future, and you don't need that aggravation in your life.
Good Luck,
2007-03-02 10:26:42 · answer #3 · answered by RepoMan18 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him as a friend, you shouldn't be worried about dating him yet or not. You should be more concerned about the drug problem. Even if you're not sure, tell him that you really care about him and you want to help, also, that if he wants to be in a relationship, then he has to be truthful, it's the best way to handle anything
2007-03-02 10:13:26 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Heather♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's better to give a resentment, than to get one. The red flag is used to do drugs and he has not done enough to impact your security level so you feel more trust. Listen to your gut, it's generally right. You will thank yourself in the end.
2007-03-02 10:13:58 · answer #5 · answered by Summer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything is a balance. Find what makes him happy and doesn't make you unhappy. In my opinion, you would be UNHAPPY dating him and UNHAPPY without him as a friend. He might not be happy if you don't date him, but he WOULD be unhappy if you weren't friends with him. So make him and yourself happy by continuing to be his friend.
I would ask him to accept your friendship and maybe over time if you see that he might be able to offer you happiness, you can be happy together. :)
Good luck.
2007-03-02 10:15:20 · answer #6 · answered by ladygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well before any committment is made try to find out in a secrectly manner by his frs or family that if he is still on drugs or not. that way u will help your self first before u fall for him more. then if he is still in drugs n he has lied try not to leave him but help me get out of it.
2007-03-02 10:14:14 · answer #7 · answered by farah2968 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you WANT to date him? If you do then just take it slow.
Let him know that he needs to earn your trust again because
of his past.
If you just like him as a friend and dont feel that way about him then I would say........NO, don't date him just to make him happy.
You can not be responsible for his happiness.... he needs to responsible for himself.
2007-03-02 10:14:45 · answer #8 · answered by Trish 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u go w/ him try and change him..try saving his life. But if u do go with him, and it goes a little to far get out of it..its ur choice honey..
2007-03-02 10:16:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
while i think you should tell him that right you are not ready to be a relationship with him. so you should help yourself.
2007-03-02 10:13:00 · answer #10 · answered by mz_guttolove 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Help yourself, you can't make someone else happy.
2007-03-02 10:14:20 · answer #11 · answered by dtwladyhawk 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋