is my best friend jealous of me?

Question

i'm not quite sure if jealousy is the right word...but tell me what you think.
an article that i wrote was published in a magazine this month (yay me!) i forwarded the article to my friends & family because i am very proud/excited. everyone responded and sent me congrats. everyone BUT my best friend, although i know that she has received it. but this isn't the first time that she has tried to downplay my accomplishments (and i guess that's why it's really bothering me).
i just think that she feels we are in competition with one another. she's constantly asking me about my salary and how i can afford to do this, that and other. and she always has some type of problem or something negative to say about everyone that i date.
even when it comes to my career, it seems that she questions/judges all of my actions rather than encourage me.
i love her dearly; we've been friends for 11 years now. but she has really hurt my feelings. should i tell her how i feel or just let her go?

i don't want to be too sensitive; but i believe that friends should offer unconditional love and support. as my best friend, i think that she should be proud of and happy for me. no?

Answer 1

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, People may Accuse you of Selfish, Ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be Honest and Frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have,and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

Answer 2

Speak with her in an non judgemental way and let her know how you feel [using "I" statements, not 'you' statements...Tell her how important her support is to you but that you often feel its absence.

My best friend can be similar in some ways - we live in different states - visit 2-3x year - speak via phone weekly and email daily. When she shares what's going on in her life and her day I always acknowledge each event in my reply...but when I share my day or my family's accomplishments [like school plays, hockey games etc] she never responds. She sends me pics of every family get together, yet when I send her pics she may or may not respond, and when she does she doesn't seem to know who's who in the pics [yes, she has met them all, as I have met hers]

Yet, like you she's a dear friend...just somewhat self centered - occasionally I will say something to her like "Hey, you never commented on such and such - did you get my email?"

She'll get better for a bit, but then back to her kinda normal..LOL

I don't think it's jealousy per se - more a reflection of some inherent self questioning and lower self esteem

Answer 3

You should most certainly tell her how you feel maybe she doesn't know she's doing it. Sometimes just because you have been friends with someone for a long time doesn't mean it's meant to be forever. Maybe you have out grown her and whatever you were suppose to learn from that relationship you have and it's time to move on. As much as that would hurt sometimes that is best. Surround yourself with positive energy life is to short.

Answer 4

Definately talk to her about it I mean u guys have been friends for 11 years! You should feel comfortable e nough to talk to her about it. Do not just let her go and end the friendship...good friends are hard to find! This is just a small rift in your frienddship that can easily be worked out! Good lluck!

Answer 5

I would suggest talking to her and finding out what she is thinking, perhaps you are just not reading her right. However at the same time I can see how you would think she is jealous because it does sound that way. If she is your best friend though I think you should let her explain herself before you let her go. Good luck!!

Answer 6

I would tell her how u feel if she doesnt listen then just tell her to that u guys should stop talking for awhile if she trys to call or somthin to tell u how sorry she is then ask her what the hell her problems are and see if u guys can work things uot if she keeps doin it then u should not be friends wit her any more.

Answer 7

yes i think u should tell her the truth bestfreinds dont put each other down let alone become jealsou of one onther n belive me jealously among women is a very dangerous thing n if she cant understand were u r coming from then 4get her u dont need negativity in ur life ur doing just fine n ur life she should be happy 4u not angry or up set that god is letting u shine

Answer 8

its not exactly jealousy. its actually like that with alot of best friends even if they dont notice it. Most girls get really competitive when it comes to enemys and best friends. its obvious why we would get competitive with our enemies but why would we be competitive with a friend? well its like people judge others alot by who they hang out with and who their best friend is. which one is pretier, smarter, more popular. and it can become a contest to get on top and be better. it ends up breaking a lot of people apart. if she really means something to you you will tell her how you feel without making her feel like she needs to get defensive. you dont want to make her feel like you think you`re better then her. try it and if she doesnt understand then ask yourdelf if she was ever really you`re bst friend.

Answer 9

First of all.....a true friend want the best for you and is extremely proud of you when you accomplish something like this in your life. I would be very proud of my best friend if she accomplish something like this.....She is very much in competition with you and I know that you been friends with her for 11 years....but you should evaluated this friendship. Maybe she is just a friend...and not your best friend or a true friend.
AND yes she is jealous of you!

Answer 10

You should tell your friend how you feel. If you just let it go then you just two people that know each other. If you love her so much then you would tell her how you feel.