I am so worried of what's going to happen when I go back to school. Before the break My bestfriend and i got really drunk, and it ended up us having sex. I am so guilty of what happened. I dont know how to approach him when I go back to school. My bestfriend is a anti-gay thing.. He always think about what others might say, everytime i do something that makes him uncomfortable. I know he's straight, and I am too. But i was shock of what happened last time. What should i do now>?
2007-03-02 07:09:23 · 18 answers · asked by malakii2 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I just to add this.. im not really proud of what i have done.. I treasure our friendship.. and if i could only turn back time, i wouldnt let that thing ruin our friendship..
2007-03-03 14:21:36 · update #1
First, let's be honest. You're not "straight." Neither of you are. For the sake of accuracy, you should refer to yourself as "mostly straight" or perhaps "a little bit bi." Most people, I suspect, are a little bit bi. But because they are conditioned not to think of homosexual behaviors as desirable, they suppress this aspect of themselves, and it only emerges when there is a convenient excuse (such as, "We were drunk").
Your best friend's sensitivity about being seen as gay means that he's insecure about his own sexual orientation, and he's very easily threatened. He's afraid that others will perceive him as gay because there's a part of him that is afraid they are right.
If your friend is in active denial, he may not ever want to think about what happened between you two ever again, let alone talk about it. He may claim that he was so drunk he doesn't even remember what happened.
On the other hand, maybe it was a wake-up call of sorts. Who knows?
The mature thing to do would be to talk about it. If nothing else, assure him that what happened between you two that night will not be shared with anyone else and it will never be used against him. And if he's not ready to talk, let him know that you're ready to listen if the time comes.
I hope you two can still be friends after this. Best of luck!
2007-03-02 07:24:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Time to fess up.....you and your friend are gay.....or at least bisexual. A truly straight person won't do the gay thing no matter how drunk they get. Don't use the "I was so drunk" excuse, because you two probably have had the hots for each other for some time now. You might as well wallow in the dark side, for this seems to be your destiny.
2007-03-02 07:53:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had sex with my straight friend too, and he was drunk, he just really wanted to see what it was like(gay sex) and maybe that is all that will happen with you guys,we still friends and when he gets drunk he asked me to do it again. but i saiod no because i am afraid that it might hurt our relationship and i dont want to lose his friendship. I dont think others are going to say anything unless someone else saw you or you tell someone. don't worry about it
2007-03-02 08:18:34 · answer #3 · answered by jumpinjackdw 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What can you do?
You got drunk and had sex...welcome to the rest of the world.
So what that it was gay sex...chill out.
That does not mean you need to be placed in any box nor start marching in parades.
if you enjoyed it maybe you can hang out and get drunk again...
if it grossed you out then don't do it again.
But bottom line is chill and DO NOT think this defines you as a person. So do not listen to those that automatically want to call you gay or place you in any other box. We are powerful spiritual beings that transcends the physical things like sex.
We are soooooooooooo much more.
2007-03-02 07:27:00 · answer #4 · answered by Papa Mac DaddyJoe 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well, he wasn't too anti-gay THAT night, now was he?!
I think you should just go about your business and don't bring it up unless he or you has something to say about it. Don't be shocked if he gets drunk and wants you again - I've seen it all before!
2007-03-02 07:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well for one thing you should probably stop referring to yourself as straight. Then get him good and drunk and ask him what you should do about the last time the two of you were good and drunk.
2007-03-02 08:00:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, thats pretty akward right there. I guess ya'll can pretend nothing ever happened and just go about your business, or talk about it and decide it was stictly the alcohol and then never talk about it again, or you could just never talk about it. lol jk
Thats hard to answer, but you definetly need to confront him and ya'll need to accept what happend and be more careful next time. It's ok, don't beat yourself up over it. Ya'll were both impared and there is nothing you can do about it now.
2007-03-02 07:15:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like neither your friend or you are too straight. Do not bring it up, but when you have some drinks again, be very aware that he may turn into wanting you again. The people that are that afraid and anti-gay, usually are fighting themselves in regards to their sexuality. They usually are afraid of becoming "one of them", because they already deep down are confused. Sometimes we hate what we are.
2007-03-02 07:23:11 · answer #8 · answered by corona001500 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Talk to him, and let him know how you felt and that you don't want it to change your friendship. He shouldn't be upset, because it takes two to Tango. Don't stress much, and if you do, it's because you're holding it in instead of facing it and solving the after math.
Krazy Libra
2007-03-02 07:22:31 · answer #9 · answered by krazy_libra_from_ac 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dude if your best-friend had sex with you ,,maybe that's a sigh hes not as straight as you thought he was,,maybe its the beginning of something beautiful..when i was 17 that happened to me and we were together after that for 3 years ,,i would talk to him,see where his head is at and then work it out if you guys are really best friends its all how you approach it.. GOOD LUCK p.s. remember it could be something more ,,,TALK IT OUT
2007-03-02 07:30:11 · answer #10 · answered by fitboyfitboyfitboy 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋