i mean i love her to death but her boyfriend does drugs and drinks all the time. i can tell that he is just looking to get layed. she is 14 and he is 17. (im 17 her bestfriend for life.) i really want her to break up with him before its too late. and just to make matters worse word has been going around that he rapes girls. ewww!!! i dont know what to do. please help! ASAP
2007-03-02 05:49:51 · 28 answers · asked by Ashley 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If he's that bad and you really care about her it might be best to tell her flat out then tell her parents if she doesn't listen. You may lose a friend temporarily (or maybe forever), but that beats finding out she was raped in my book.
2007-03-02 05:54:20 · answer #1 · answered by Rossonero NorCal SFECU 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would let her know that she could do much better.. tell her how beautiful she is and how smart she is... just tell her that you really dont think he is good enough for her (not that you are going to think any guy ever is.but) Then just leave it at that.. that way she knows how you feel about her and about him.. but ultimately she is going to make her own decision.. and being her best friend you will have to be there for her no matter what that is. If you try and make a big scene, throw a fit, get mad at her it will only make matters worse and leave her feeling like she she is out a friend. Just put yourself in her shoes.
hope this helps! take care and good luck!
2007-03-02 05:58:18 · answer #2 · answered by callmecouture 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because you think he is a complete loser does not mean that she thinks so. Everyone has different tastes.
As a friend you might tell her the things you know and have heard about him and see how she reacts.
Let her know you don't want to hurt her, but you thought she needed to know these things if she didn't already and as her best friend you are concerned for her.
Straight forward and to the point...no game playing or dancing around the subject.
If you feel she needs to know these things, then tell her.
I would not call him a Loser as that might put her on the defense, but I would tell her what you know. That is really all you can do as it is her choice who she sees.
be cool...
2007-03-02 05:57:40 · answer #3 · answered by CC Babydoll 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if he really is that bad then you need to sit her down and say that you love her to death and you only wants whats best for her and you didnt want to tel her this cus you know she is so happy to have a boyfriend but you had to tell her and then tell her all that stuff
and if she doesnt listen then you need to really help her cus he is nad news usually if there are rumors about rape its already been going on for a long time and it only gets worse so if sh doesnt listen then slip a letter with no name on it and no return address to her mom or in her moms purse or something that way she can get the help she needs to get away from this guy
and 3 years isnt a big age gab except at her age then its huge
so be the best friend you can be and try to stop her even if she gets mad at you
2007-03-02 05:57:24 · answer #4 · answered by carmelfude2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if she is really your bestfriend and the other way around. You should just tell her exactly what you think of the situation and that you dont think that this is good for her. If she is truely your friend she will take what you say into consideraton! Thats all you can do- Just be straight forward! and Hope that she will listen!
2007-03-02 05:54:01 · answer #5 · answered by 04/12/2008 :) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is truely your best friend, then you shouldn't have any problem telling her that her boyfriend is a loser. I wouldn't spread the rumor about him raping girls due to the fact he was never convicted or had accusations brought against him. You need to be her friend and be there for her. If she decides to continue to see the boyfriend, you need to stand by her and respect her decision. Thank you and good luck.
2007-03-02 05:56:54 · answer #6 · answered by cookie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell your friend straight how you feel....Nine times out of ten, she won't listen and she might have to find out on her own unless you talk to the guy and get him to stop talking to her but then you run the risk of her getting all mad and never talking to you again. Basically it all depends on what you want to do...Save her safety and never talk to her again or let something that could possibly be horrible and still talk to her? Either case, things could change, he could get rid of her before anything bad happens to her or eventually she might understand that what you were trying to do was help her and eventually become BFF again. Good luck whatever you plan to do....
2007-03-02 05:54:10 · answer #7 · answered by the_wicked_itch_of_the_west 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she's 14 and dating a 17 year old?? who drinks and does drugs??
Either her parents aaren't involved, or she is hiding it from them.
tell your friend to DO THE MATH:
--if she gets pregnant by this loser, she's only to get about 20% of his pay as child support. If she thinks she can raise a baby on 20% of a loser's pay, good luck!
2007-03-02 05:56:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
try to talk to her about it and be honest. Maybe she will listen to a voice of reason and finally break up with that loser boyfriend.
If that does not work however, then there is little you can do to help her. In that case I suggest you stay out of their way completely and not get caught up in their business. Otherwise, they can bring trouble to your doorstep.
2007-03-04 17:47:06 · answer #9 · answered by alwang92581 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to tell her anything..you need to tell her mom. A 14 year old has no business dating anybody,much less a 17 year old that drinks and drugs. If you are 17 you need to show a little bit of maturity and tell her mother she needs to reign this kid in.
2007-03-02 05:55:25 · answer #10 · answered by dog8it 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋