I just found out my grandmother passed away last weekend. No one in my family bothered to call me and tell me, and now I will miss the funeral. When I asked, "Well, what is Grandpa going to do now?" imagine my SHOCK and HORROR to find out that my grandfather died 4 MONTHS AGO and NO ONE told me! I am going through so many feelings, including anger with my family for not telling me about all this until it's too late... please, any advice for this ridiculous situation would be most appreciated. I am at a loss as to where to turn, how to feel... I just feel blank.
2007-03-02 05:40:00 · 8 answers · asked by Liz F 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Write them a letter of how you are feeling. Be straight forward, but not insulting. Tell them how you feel. And how you would appreciate from now on a phone call whether someone in the family has taken ill, or if something has happened. Make sure you "refresh" their memories by writing down your full and complete address, e-mail address, home, work, and cell phone numbers. Let them know that you care about all of your family members and friends. That you are aware of how busy everyone can get. And then from now on send an email or make a phone call so that they see that you intend on keeping up with your family's current events. I really hope this works. This happened to me years ago when my sister-in-law passed away. My brother called me about a month and a half later. (Mind you at the time my phone had been disconnected). He knew how to get in touch with me.(How was he able to let me know of her passing? He called one of the other numbers that I had given him). I was very hurt and didn't know what to do. In the meantime if you have a close friend maybe you guys can talk. Hope that something of what I have written here helps you even if it's a little bit. My deepest sympathies to you.
2007-03-02 05:53:53 · answer #1 · answered by rencar32002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. That is tough. I have to be honest with you though- if you were close to your family, called your grandparents every once in a while, and took some responsibilty for your relationship with them, wouldn't you have known sooner? Is there a chance that you were caught up in your own little world and that your own lack of contact is partly to blame? I agree, they should have told you, but on the other hand, I have a sister that doesn't get any details about family stuff because her own behavior has alienated the family, so I can kind of see both sides. I am sorry for your loss. My own grandparents mean the world to me, and I don't know what I'd do without them.
2007-03-02 05:51:37 · answer #2 · answered by Lesley M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your double loss. Death is a very hard thing to handle. There is no easy way to deal and everyone deals with it different. It helps to have someone to support you. If you have a very close friend talk to them about your grandparents. You can find a support group. The best way to cope is to never forget the person keep them close in your heart. You could even talk to a minister or priest. They could give you advice. Pray and find peace in yourself. Crying helps also. Again I'm so sorry for your loss.
2007-03-02 06:02:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Focus yourself on grieving and processing and celebrating your grandparents for a moment. Pick a day and go on a journey in their honor. Bring a photo of them or a momento if you have it, or go to places that make you think of them. They want you to be happy, and it will make you feel good to be happy in their honor. You can't change what your family does - and what they did was really heartless - so my best advice is to treat yourself well and put effort into creating moments that give you strength to deal with them when you have to.
And in a few days, weeks, months, whatever, if you ever want to, write them a letter individually, or call them, or tell them to their face how their action made you feel. That's all you can really do I think. Each of them has to become aware and choose to act differently on their own. the only person you have power to change is yourself.
2007-03-02 05:51:22 · answer #4 · answered by imnotachickenyoureaturkey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to who about your loss. I can't say I know how you feel, but I know how it felt when I loss my grandma. I think you should pray to God he do answer prayers. Also, read your Holy Bible if you have one. Read Psalm 23 it begins like this The Lord is my shepard, I shall not want, He leadeth me beside the still water.
2007-03-02 06:08:24 · answer #5 · answered by angle2005star 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st i am very sorry to know about it and what could you do about it your family loves you or not you can do nothing for it just as a freind i can advise you that just be happy with yourself don't worry for it let it go give your mind some peace once again let it go The world is mean.
2007-03-02 05:48:30 · answer #6 · answered by krish_kissme 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Iam so sorry to hear that, but the only thing you can do is pray for you and your family dont matter what, because God is the only one who can help you through your problems
2007-03-02 05:46:57 · answer #7 · answered by candace63110 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there,. it's a fact of life,.,we all have to die,.every living thing has to die,..,.
good luck,.take the time you need to heal,...,..
2007-03-02 05:48:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋