She won't talk about it. It bothers me all the time. How can I let it go and be there for her?
2007-03-02 02:08:21 · 11 answers · asked by Lost one 4 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
This is truly the sad result of many sexual assaults. Many women will not prosecute because they know that scum defense atty's will drag them through the mud.
I would go to the police and find out if there is a statute of limitations on sexual assault. If your friend can prosecute, she should.
Please tell her from me that I know what she is going through, I had a friend who had the same thing happen. I convinced her to go to the police and she found a great atty who helped her to prosecute and the guy is now doing 11 yrs in the state Pen.
It will not be easy. As I said she will be dragged through the mud. But she must be strong as these guys WILL do it again, believe me. Only by facing evil can it be stopped. And true heros will at least attempt to stop others from being victimized.
She is not alone, and she is not a bad person. Never let her forget that.
2007-03-02 02:18:53 · answer #1 · answered by Eric K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am writing from BC, Canada.
In BC, there is no time limit for bringing a civil claim for sexual assault, but if the attackers have no assets, doing this has little point. Other provinces, such as Alberta, have different laws.
I am not sure about the criminal procedure, as I do not practice criminal law.
If she will not talk about the events, she cannot claim or try to get the police involved. Your friend had a very traumatic experience. Just thinking about what happened, much less talking about it, can be very difficult. It can trigger flashbacks, lead to drug and alcohol abuse, and in some cases put a person over the edge so that they attempt suicide. I say this as a lawyer who has represented many victims of serious sexual abuse.
Your friend should have some counselling if / when she wants and she should call a lawyer if / when she wants. Do NOT push her to get the legal process involved, talk about the events, get counselling, etc. If you make the assault a focus of your relationship, your friend may start to identify you as part of the trauma and that is not a good thing. She does not need to feel branded by the assault. Please remember that the decisions are hers and hers alone. Your role is to love and respect her and her choices. As for "let it go," I suggest that you let it go through your love for your friend.
2007-03-02 03:43:15 · answer #2 · answered by Eric W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As for prosecution it depends completely upon where it happened. The statute of limitations on rape is typically several years, however....some states have taken a tougher route on this and pushed for removal of statute of limitations. So you need to check within your state laws.
As for the problem of you letting it go and being there for her.
I don't mean this the way its probably going to sound, but you need to get over yourself. Keep in mind this did not happen to you, it happened to her. It is a very traumatic thing and very personal. Talking about it is the hardest thing she will ever do, unless you want to alienate her completely you need to accept this is her problem and she NEEDS to deal with it on her own time. The more you talk about it the less it sounds like you support her and the less she is going to trust you. She trusted you with a very intense secret from her past, do NOT violate that trust by pushing the issue. The last thing she wants and needs to feel like is a victim and everytime you bring it up you victimize her all over again. Granted I know you are trying to help, but sometimes unsolicited help is a hinderance.
If she is ready to talk to you or anybody she will, so drop it for now. Good luck!
2007-03-02 02:33:42 · answer #3 · answered by Chrissy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could try this site if you are looking for legal help. Not sure if it's too late to prosecute--it depends on how long ago it was...there is usually a 7 year statute of limitations on these things. http://legal.divinfo.com/
2007-03-02 02:18:22 · answer #4 · answered by Reenie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she won't talk about it - then no... there is no chance of prosecution.
Prosecution at this point may not help her heal any faster... is it possible that you are hurting her by bringing it up?
Or does she bring it up and THEN not want to talk about it?
With abuse victims, you just have to be there for them as much as possible so they know that they have a trustworthy friend... that is all you can do...
and don't talk about it with other people unless she specifically asks you to - just common sense.
2007-03-02 02:14:48 · answer #5 · answered by rabble rouser 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It really depends on the staute of limitations on the particular crime that was committed and in what state. I dont believe sexual crimes have a statute of limitations, the problem is it would be her word against theres as there would be no chance at any evidence..... Unfortunatley I dont htink there is much she can do at this point.
2007-03-02 02:12:44 · answer #6 · answered by joeinchino2000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think there is a limitation but it would be very difficult to hold up in court....if she won't talk about it then there's no case really....even if she did talk all of the DNA evidence would be gone....i don't think u will ever be able to let something like that go...but it is really great that u are still there for her....i wish all people could be as concerned about their friends as you.....hope this helps
2007-03-02 03:17:19 · answer #7 · answered by Sam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really cant transfer her bad emotions or whatever she is feeling to you. I know that that is a bad situation that your friend went through, but the only thing that you can do is be there for her. Dont talk to her about it, when she wants to talk shell talk. Remember that this is not an easy situation for her. You can suggest she go to therapy to work on those issues.
2007-03-02 02:17:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is a statute of limitations on rape but it would be extremely difficult to prove after more than a year unless she was underage and there was still some physical evidence lying around.
2007-03-02 02:13:25 · answer #9 · answered by Nicktu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi friends is how a lot kundli matching is real?i extremely opt for a most suitable answer because i'm slightly perplexed!My sister and her boyfriend kumdli does journey because the boy is mangli and that i extremely don't understand what mangli skill!yet they love one yet another easily for one and a 0.5 year.And the priest suggested that they couldn't get married as for a short era they're going to be at liberty yet her boy buddy would have yet another existence with some different person!My good judgment says that kumdli matching isn't real yet slightly perplexed!Please help... thanks...
2016-11-27 00:05:03 · answer #10 · answered by hole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋