2007-03-02 01:40:03 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That's the problem I want 2 b n 1 place w/my family, he wants 2 b w/his
2007-03-02 01:44:40 · update #1
I don't think either would be fairer. If both the husband and the wife want to live ner their family, neither has more right. Unfortunately you both can't get what you want here. I think you're better of both compromising and living in a completely different state, rather than one person getting to live near their family because it will only lead to resentment for the other person. If you choose somewhere that is somewhat equidistance between the two, that would probably the fairest for both of you.
2007-03-02 01:56:12 · answer #1 · answered by LMS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that u need to come to a serious conclusion about this one. There is no way that u can get around this one. A good solution is to live where ever the two of u met. Of course that doesn't work if the two of u have been commuting to see each other since u met. It will work if u both lived in the same state. I don't see why u would want to leave the state that u live in so u could go back to where your family lives anyway. Talk about it and see where each person stands. It shoudn't be about living with your family any way. Where ever u 2 go, it should be based on the opportunities that it provides for your new family.
2007-03-02 01:48:19 · answer #2 · answered by Vince R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That should be considered, discussed, and decided prior to marriage and not after. It has a great impact on holding a marriage together. Even though a husband and wife shouldn't care where they live as long as they are together, it does matter when it comes to having family close by. Which state is fair? That has to be a serious discussion you both have and can compromise on. Be very careful of your decision because it's not that easy anymore packing up and moving once you put down some roots especially when kids in school, jobs, and purchasing a house is involved. It doesn't just affect your mental well being it also has great impact on your financial future.
2007-03-02 01:49:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first 6 years of our marriage we didnt live near either family, but his family was closest, at 6 hours away. The last 4 years, we have lived near my family, mostly all within the same county now. Its hard, but we have always went where the work is. The main reason we are here now, is cuz my gramma passed away and left me her house, plus its a small town with an excellent grade school system, rated in the top ten in my state. You have to live where it suits you and your husband, or find a hapy medium, where travel to each others familys is equal.
2007-03-02 02:09:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I am from Irleand and I moved to San Diego where I met my husband so this is where we live, it turns out its not near my family or his really. The compromise we make is , having a cabin in the mountains where is family is from so during the winter we all go there at every opportunity....it is great for the kids too as they can snowboard and so can we it really is what suits our family as a whole. During the summer months or sometimes for Christmas we all go home to Ireland, where we have a house very close to my family.
It is all about compromise, neither of us want to live around the corner from the other's family, we need our own space as a family too. I am unfortunate as it is much more exspensive to travel to my family but they visit regularly and it all works out for the bast.
You need to do what is right for your family as a whole not the inlaws.
2007-03-02 02:21:37 · answer #5 · answered by strictmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The couple should live where it is best for them. A main factor to consider is: where can you get the best job(s) and the best education for the kids. Also where is the cost of living most affordable. It's nice to be near family, but you have to think of you "new" family first.
2007-03-02 01:45:56 · answer #6 · answered by Michele H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Anywhere that makes the two of you happy, it is your relationship and you will be working on building a new family of your own.... a choice between the two of you not anyone's parents! Have you considered living in the middle of the two states?
2007-03-02 01:44:26 · answer #7 · answered by Betty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
marriage is all about compromise! 1/2 way between the two families should work for the two of you ..
2007-03-02 07:29:11 · answer #8 · answered by <3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should live where the two of you want to live. Not base it on where family lives.
2007-03-02 01:43:07 · answer #9 · answered by Jewel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You go where the jobs are! No matter what. Whether its with his or her family doesn't matter. You can visit either way.
2007-03-02 01:44:34 · answer #10 · answered by Mightymo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋