I was married for 14 years. I treated my wife like a queen. I loved her, I provided for her (she didn't have to work) and I kept our home, laundry, house cleaning etc. I hind sight I know I did to much for her. Her on the other hand was terrible to me, she would tell people that I beat her, she told people she ran my business and I really got in her way. She loved to brag on herself and knock me down, she seemed to love that. Her favorite thing to do was to tell friends and family that she was being abused by me, NOTHING could have been further from the truth, quite the opposite, she would tell some that I was cheating on her as well. She finally left me and married the next door neighbor 3 days after our divorce. Needless to say he treats her like crap, my children have told me their is violence between them, yet she never seemed happier. We have a younger son (12) that has said this too...she deny's this goes on and calls him a liar.
Why would she lie about me
and protect him?
2007-03-02 01:07:10 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
She lie's about everything. Her husband is for a lack of a better word a "redneck". Why would this happen???
Is there a name for it??
2007-03-02 01:08:35 · update #1
Greg, I'm no wimp, I'm an x-Marine. I just treated her like I thought a woman would like to be treated, respect, love, honesty, faithfullness, generousity, I adored her. That is not to be confused with being a wimp...IMO
2007-03-02 01:22:26 · update #2
Okay, Bud. You were a wimp, and women don't respect a wimp, and you let her get away with disrespecting you. Chances are the die were cast before you married when you failed to set healthy boundaries.
On her rebound marriage (she's not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed either, huh), she went after somebody who isn't a wimp (who will at least stand up to her) probably because he represented what you lacked in your relationship with her.
The thing is, it doesn't sound like either you or she have learned a thing from all of this: you still sound like a wimp, she still doesn't sound like she's in a healthy relationship with a gentleman. She's messed up, and you're a wimp.
Hope that helps.
per you comments: I don't care if you're Mr. Universe and won the first Gulf War single-handedly. You're a wimp when it comes to women. You wouldn't have put up with all that bad behavior if you weren't, and you wouldn't have rushed into a marriage with somebody who didn't respect you if you weren't. You've bought into some touchy-feely crap about treating women like a queen and forgot the mental health part of not submitting to bad behavior. If you were a confident gentleman, she'd know that you would leave if she treated you badly down in her bones.
You get no respect by turning into a doormat.
Take some time to think about this, really. Good relationships take mutual respect, affection, flexibility, etc.
Take your time getting involved in new relationships: go slow, look out for red flags, and if they are a mess, have a bad attitude or low character, cut them loose and move on having learned a little more. Keep moving until you are an expert and attract one worth keeping around, and then don't relapse into wimp mode if you find a good one.
Try this the next time a woman you are dating tests you with some small bad behavior: turn it into a joke and tease her, have fun with her acting like a child.
You might as well have fun with it while you are learning.
2007-03-02 01:18:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dude I have one critical thing to say. YOUR FREE! Free of the nightmares, free of the lies, free of the judasing you and free of the games. She wants someone to put her in her place, being controlled like a little girl. She had him planned out before your divorce. Granted this seems evil and somewhat redundant to say but ..SCREW HER! She made her bed, let her lay in it.
I really didn't see a bonified question here but a plea of insanity of this situation you all want us to share in. I came, I read, I understood, I have been there where you are and my advice to you is....Move on and enjoy the rewards of your single-hood. There a hell of a lot more wonderful giving soulfull women that Will make you feel like more than a man and will be your rock in a life of trouble times. This last witch left you resenting.
2007-03-02 01:20:21 · answer #2 · answered by Kill_Me_Now! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is called infidelity amigo! She said those things to justify her infidelity just in case someone found out that she was screwing the neighbor.Now she really screwed up and must face the music.That neighbor will never have respect for her,and she is about to find out the hard way! You are a good man so move on and NEVER give her another chance.Just concern yourself with those nice kids.Someone special will come your way sooner or later.
2007-03-02 01:15:28 · answer #3 · answered by Student 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you`ve been through hell, and that part of your life that made you so miserable is gone, learn from the mistakes you first made so that they won`nt be repeated ,if you can spend time with your kids, make them feel special, bring them up not down, take them to church if they will go, otherwise take yourself . For as hard as it may seem,your life will change. Think positive.
2007-03-02 01:31:06 · answer #4 · answered by h.tyou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stupidness!!!! Some people just can handle being treated like a princess. Maybe cause they are scared if they enjoy it they will lose it...I don't know...I know if I had a guy like you I'd never let you go
2007-03-02 01:16:01 · answer #5 · answered by Gloria B 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I don't know the name for it. but be glad she is out of your life, she did not deserve you. find someone that will appriciate the things you do for them and that is honest. and I would consider in trying to get your children out of that situation, who knows what will happen to them. good luck.
2007-03-02 01:17:58 · answer #6 · answered by misty blue 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i believe this is called retarded ex-wife syndrome. she sounds like a.... i dunno, witch.....
i think that you should get custody of your kids, and move. not far, so you could still have your buisness, but far enough that you dont have to see her anymore. she is doing your kids a lot of damage by calling them liars, and letting them see the violence that is going on in her home.
i wish you luck, you sound like a good man, stuck in a bad situation.
2007-03-02 01:18:00 · answer #7 · answered by smcopeland16 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
She might not be willing to admit she was a fool, unless it envoles your kids, let it and her go,
2007-03-02 01:16:24 · answer #8 · answered by Granny 1 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well...
2007-03-02 01:16:26 · answer #9 · answered by Britt 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋