Why did you do it, what were the conquences and did you regret it or were there some things you missed about the marriage and some things you did not?
2007-03-01 23:37:09 · 16 answers · asked by gotagetaweigh 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Surprising that these divorces have reasons I agree with. The times I heard people go through divorce was the woman and usaully was "emotional unfullfillment"
Explain that to me please.
2007-03-02 00:12:53 · update #1
She was constantly crabby, moody, etc. I could do all of the housework or none of the housework (after working 3rd shift) and she'd still come home and be grumpy. I seriously think she is bi-polar, but she wouldn't get a doctor opinion.
Another thing was discipline of the children. They'd get a swat from me, but get a timeout and then a cookie from her (she felt guilty) so whenever there was a conflict, they pushed her buttons BIG time, and she'd end up screaming into a pillow. They knew better than that with me, foot in the a** and it was done.
Money. I went from making 25k when we first got married to now making 63k in 8 years. I've strived to improve myself where she did not. She was comfy with her part time job and didn't even want to continue with school even though I offered.
I like to hunt, and would be gone a lot in the fall for hunting. I would always come straight home afterward. I asked her one time if it would be better if I went to the bar and chased women instead. (Like her friends' husbands did, or be gone on a two day bender without calling home) She didn't see the humor in it. lol
It's not usually the man that files for divorce, but this one did. Most of my family asked me what took me so long once they heard the news.
I am now with a woman who is wonderful. I can't believe my ex and my girlfriend are the same species.
One last tidbit, I was her 3rd divorce. Obviously the men weren't the problem here.
2007-03-01 23:47:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Reason for getting a divorce - married a guy who said he wanted kids, after the marriage he changed his mind. I found out I was pregnant, he asked me to get an abortion, I told him I would not. A month later I miscarried. Ever since he asked me to get the abortion I dispised him and couldn't stand being around him. So, I divorced him because I ultimately wanted kids. I do not regret my decision to divorce him. The only thing I missed about being with that guy is that he used to like taco bell as much as I did. :) That's it. He was a gamer, played on the computer constantly and he played Mech Warrior, Mage Knight and ran games at the gaming store. Was a real big Gen-Con person. I don't miss any of that. My house doesn't have figures and other crap all over it now.
2007-03-02 08:02:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Encourage is WRONG!!!! The only reason for divorce IS NOT for being unfaithful. Alot of people can actually work through that. I am getting mine annulled because I caught him watching little girls on the internet. I have a teenage daughter of my own (not his) and grossed out when I saw what he was doing. I miss absolutely NOTHING about the marriage except for the fact that he refuses to give me the rest of my belongings I brought into the marriage...most of which actually belong to my daughter. All because he thinks I have the hard drive to his computer...which I DO NOT. He is also an alcoholic and drug addict. He is abusive and laughs to everyone at work how he threw steak knives at me and barely missed.
2007-03-02 09:50:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Deciding to divorce is not the easy way out for me, it's the hardest decision I've ever made in my life. It took me 10 years and lots of trials a tribulations to make that decision.
Staying in an unhappy but not horrible marriage would have been easy. But I would never have been fulfilled.
There are all types of abuse in a relationship besides the obvious ones such as man who verbally or physically abusive or is a drunk.
I left because I never felt like an equal partner, what I said and thought didn't matter. Years of resentment set in and as my kids go older I decided it was my turn to find my happiness. That was hard. But I'm at peace with myself for me it was the right thing to do.
2007-03-02 07:54:16 · answer #4 · answered by cream city chick 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My first wife fell in with "the wrong crowd" at her work. They went on "business" trips and spent the company's money on having a good time. She got a taste of life that being at home didn't offer much of. It was like a drug to her. She eventually tried marijuana and other substances while with her coworkers. Stories of her being totally drunk to the point of passing out circulated back to me. She slept around. During the last 7 years of our marriage she was with at least 4 other guys, some of which were cheap, one- night stands in which she never asked the guy his last name. Some of the other men were also married. Meanwhile I was at home taking care of our 2 kids, wondering if we'd ever get past this and put our family back together the way it should be- the way it WAS before. She didn't want that. She filed for divorce. I am now remarried (almost 3 years). The kids love their stepmom and she loves them like her own. We also have a newborn together! My ex just recently remarried. I feel sorry for the poor guy. I have never known anyone more sinister and coldly calculating than my ex wife. I also feel sorry for my 2 oldest kids. They don't like their new stepdad...
2007-03-02 07:47:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anomaly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well my reason came suddenly i guess we were arguing over him not doing equal amounts of housework and some sexual problems and he said somthing to the affect of me being a nag and we were happier when we lived apart ,it just suddenly dawned on me that i should move out (it would be better for all ) without the intention of us breaking up ,at first anyway ,
while packing my things which took quite a few days my feelings started to change and i realised i did not want to be with him at all anymore.
i moved out within 2 months i was seeing someone else who i'm still with
some people may think my reasons are silly but i don't he obviously viewed me as being lower than him somehow .
and no i don't regret it i know i'm better off without than with.
p.s when i do bump into him he occasionally ask's me if we are going to get back together (when not yet divorced )and my answer is a firm "no we are not"
2007-03-02 07:53:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first husband left me when our daughter was 16 months old. He played mind games about just needing space for a while, harrassed and threatened me at work for six months before I filed for divorce. It took three years.
My second husband went to prison for sexual battery/victim under 12, 4 children. I got my divorce 10 months later.
There is nothing I miss from my second marriage. From my first the only thing I regret is that my daughter does not have immediate access to BOTH of her parents but the situation was not healthy for any of us if we had kept on.
I wish marriage and divorce were still as idealistic as others wish it were. But honestly, in either of those circumstances what else could I have done?
2007-03-02 07:43:02 · answer #7 · answered by Betsy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Getting a divorce as we speak---Infidelity,lack of communication over time...deal breakers.The trust issue will drive a person insane.The infidelity issue sometimes keep coming back to haunt me like a boomerang.We did try for a year and half before coming to this conclusion.We have a 11 yr old daughter,so we did try,but i guess all is well in the end,we are not angry...just still have to be great parents together..
2007-03-02 08:54:33 · answer #8 · answered by ccrazeegyrl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was an alcoholic, sex addict, refused to have kids, refused to go on vacation etc. I could go on and on.
What were the consequences? Well I had to pay him off to get rid of him (yes sometimes WOMEN have to do that). Oh well, you can always make more money right? Your sanity on the other hand is priceless.
Life is much better being single! I am a better person now than I ever was when I was married.
2007-03-02 09:00:18 · answer #9 · answered by Ker Plunk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ONLY reason to get divorced is if you are miss treated brutally...or your mate is unfaithful. Marriage is a gift from God and people act like divorce is the easy way out.
Most people that do get divorced arnet really regretting it.
We were DESIGNED for marriage so we would not be lonely!
2007-03-02 07:44:19 · answer #10 · answered by rockinweazel 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋