Ok, so my husband and i have a problem that we really dont know how to handle. He has been divorced for 8 years now and married to me for 4. he also has 2 children with his ex wife. His son is graduating the 8th grade this year. His ex called and said they will be having the cermony at 5 then the kids will have their dance at 7 and from 9 to 11 there is a party for the (parents only) after the party the kids are going to get shuttled over to where the parents are at 11p.m So she told my husband that this parent party is for Real parents only. I told my husband that that was a bit fishy to me. Since I am his wife and why would I not be able to come with. So my husband called the school and they said it was for parents only and i am consider a parent because i am his wife. so he asked his son if maybe he did not want me to come and he said he wants me there. but his mom does not so that is why she said it! How do we bring this up to her?
2007-03-01 23:05:34 · 8 answers · asked by Jennifer M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
MY HUSBAND WANTS ME THERE. HE IS UPSET. BUT WE HAVE TO PAY MONEY AND ONLY SHE HAS THE SLIP. AND MY HUSBAND HATES TO BE WITH HER! HE HATES EVERYTHING ABOUT HER!
2007-03-01 23:32:13 · update #1
I think he needs to be the one to talk to her and explain that she needs to realize that you are part of the family whether she likes it or not. Plus, if their son wants you to be there, then that's all that should matter. She probably has serious jealousy issues and it bothers her that she's not the only woman her children care about.
I dealt with a slightly similar situation. The school had a "Munchies for Moms day" where the moms would go to school with the kids for breakfast. She actually didn't want to go so I offered to go with my step-son since he was upset thinking he'd be the only one there without a mom. She just about blew a gasket! I ended up not going though to try and keep the peace. I regret that I didn't though.
2007-03-01 23:15:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I too deal with a nasty ex-wife that has my husband's children, so I am completely understanding and on your side here... But... why bring it up, really? What will it solve or prove? This is suppose to be the kid's day, don't make a situation that will deflect any of the spot light off him! Even if he is unaware of it, you guys will know there is tension and no one will be focused on the kid. Let it go. You will prove an even bigger, better point by going, smiling and having a good time. It's not like bringing up the issue will get a truthful response or even make the behavior stop. Do u really think if the woman is up to something that she would admit it anyways? Who cares... I really don't see the problem here. No matter what her intentions were you still get to go, so her plan is shot down. Make this a joyous occasion for you, your husband and your stepson! Don't make the kid or your husband regret asking to you to go.
2007-03-02 07:32:11 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is to bring up just go to the party if you want and the child wants she can not tell you what to do and she will only show her own ignorance if she makes a fuss in public
be nice and go about your life she can only run things if you let her
if you are always courtious but firm in yourself than she will get the message soon or later but it really doesn't matter she is only in your lives about the kids and only so far as you let her
2007-03-02 07:26:18 · answer #3 · answered by pokey's gumby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To hell with her...go to the party. If she acts a fool have your husband pull her aside and talk to her. Now if she continues to loss her mind, the both of you may have to leave a little early. Do not act ignorant if she does. Show who has more class ; ) There is an obvious issue with her about your presence. So what she better get over with it because you are his better half. Go and enjoy self and again, 'To Hell with her'. Good luck.
2007-03-02 07:25:18 · answer #4 · answered by DJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you should not go. You know that your husband son like you as a step-parent. So the biological mother might be jealous of you. Just let your husband go without you. It is that this lady and your husband made a child together. so for the boy sake let your husband go. remember your husband picked you and left her.
2007-03-02 07:18:30 · answer #5 · answered by mo1979ca 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why do you need to go? This sounds like a little insecurity going on. She is the mother and you knew this when you got married, so deal with it. Sometimes there are special occasions that are meant for real parents.
2007-03-02 07:13:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get your own slip from the school. You don't need her slip, as his father, the school must offer him the same invitation to school activities that the mother gets. Just go to the school or call them and handle it yourselves without the mother. Who needs her? Believe me, you're not alone in the way she treats you.
2007-03-02 08:16:07 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont bring it up to her at all. She is just being herself. Just go to the party/meeting with your husband and dont say anything to her about it. She will probably be mad, but her actions are her actions. It doesnt reflect you at all.....
2007-03-02 07:10:19 · answer #8 · answered by Encouragement 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋