How do people ever get over an abusive relationship , emotional and physical abuse ? Do u ever get over it ? I dont think its something that ever leaves u ...
2007-03-01 21:23:51 · 15 answers · asked by jizzumonkey 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I am over it in the sense that i am a very happy person now and have learned to actually like myself ... its been almost 4 years since i left .. but i cant see myself ever being able to trust anyone ever ...
Nice to hear of the positive comments xox
2007-03-01 21:38:09 · update #1
Hi Friend, No you never get over something like this. I had a abusive husband for 30 years. I guess i stay because of my 2 daughter. After the grew-up and left home the abuse got a little worse. I couldn't even have my friend over, even if he was at work. If i went shopping and wasn't home WHEN HE THOUGHT I SHOULD BE. He would say i was with my boyfriend and cheating on him. The list gos on and on and on.He did get physical a lot with me and hurt me. Is mentally abuse is what was the hardest i think.He would say terrible things about me,and he really meant it. I finally had enought and finally divorce his sorry ***. I feel sorry for any woman who gets tie down with this a s s h o l e. I will never get over a lot of things he did to me. You just cannot forget. There's a lot of things i cannot do with my true soulmate because of my X and probably will never beable to do these things ever. Sweetie just hang in there and take one day at a time and do the best you can do. That's want i do everyday. A Friend Who Cares And Knows.
Clowmy
2007-03-01 21:40:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in an abusive relationship once upon a time. I got beaten on regular occasions, my 2 eldest children can remember things that i cant. I got out of the situation and took my kids with me. That was 14yrs ago now, ive never looked back. I am now in a happy relationship, and my children want for nothing. I might not have money and wealth but they have a loving stable environment. I found someone who loves me for who i am and yes you do forget when you find the right person. Although it was hard at first the slightest argument and you start cowering but you overcome that with the love and trust you receive from your partner.
2007-03-01 21:30:54 · answer #2 · answered by spensmum 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I didnt have an abusive relationship but my parents were abusive and you are right it never completely leaves you as I know, but you can move on with your life it is normally hard to trust tho as i have problems in that area. But you cound like you have already got really far after that. All you have to do is keep your head up high and dont think bout the past think about the future.
Good Luck.....
2007-03-02 07:47:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, just a few facts about domestic violence. Like you said, it is something that never leaves you, but you CAN move on. Take its as experience. My sister was a victin if domestic violence and something she said stuck in my mind: "Things that hurt, only make you stronger". I dont think she will ever forget what happened that night, but atleast she can move on with out having him in her life.
What is domestic violence?
Domestic violence is physical, sexual, psychological or financial violence that takes place within an intimate or family-type relationship and that forms a pattern of coercive and controlling behaviour. More
How common is domestic violence?
1 in 4 women experience domestic vioelnce in their lifetime and between 1 in 8 to 1 in 10 women experience it annually. Less than half of all incidents are reported to the Police, but they still receive one domestic violence call every minute in the UK. More
Who are the victims?
Domestic violence can occur regardless of ethnicity, religion, class, age, sexuality, disability or lifestyle. It can also occur in a range of relationships including heterosexual, gay, lesbian, bi-sexual and transgender relationships. More
Who are the abusers?
Abusers come from all walks of life. They can come from any ethnic group, religion, class or neighbourhood. They may be older or younger. They can be male or female, but the majority of perpetrators are men. More
What is the cause of domestic violence?
Abusers choose to behave violently to get what they want and gain control. Their behaviour often originates from a sense of entitlement which is often supported by sexist, racist, homophobic and other discriminatory attitudes. More
Why doesn't she leave?
Whilst the risk of staying may be very high, simply leaving the relationship doesn't guarantee that the violence will stop. In fact, the period when a woman is planning or making her exit, is often the most dangerous time for her and her children
2007-03-01 21:35:53 · answer #4 · answered by Sarah W 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes you can get over the negative effects of an abusive relationship, but it doesn't just leave. You need to do lots of hard work in changing negative thought patterns. It is hard to forget about an abusive relationship but it doesn't need to linger like a dark cloud over your life. I think people who have moved on from abusive relationships are much better at great relationships because they have learned the hard way what does not work.
2007-03-01 21:32:06 · answer #5 · answered by Mishell 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Despite who you are, some times life makes you what you are, I agree that you can never get over it but how you get on with the rest of it is different. You have a unique insite in to that side of life, it can destroy you or enlighten you. Empower yourself and others, it takes time , when I was a child and I listened to people who said that time is a great healer, I would say to myself WHAT. But there is life after death in the real world. If you can believe in a ca coon, a moth or a butterfly, you can believe that you will go on to see things differently in time. Be strong, you may be a little bit damaged but there is hope for us all
2007-03-01 23:02:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For me it took only a few minutes... a second hit/slap was all I needed to see that this was going down the wrong road.
I wanted more for myself so I left and was over it. I choose to have a great life and no one will hit me again with out being dropped like a bag of dirt after I get up.
I did not want to dwell on the past but I will also not let it repeat itself. I have and had the power to direct my life the way I see fit. I wish others would catch on to this as well.
2007-03-01 21:38:26 · answer #7 · answered by Kitty 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, it is possible, however, for some this may require psychological counseling and assistance. Anything that does not kill us, has the option of making one stronger. So, yes, one can overcome and heal and become a very strong and more empowered individual. And learn to make better choices in regards to the mates they choose in the future. Good luck and God bless****
2007-03-01 21:31:32 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm.....
Abusive relationships take time to form....
One day there was this sweet guy wining and dining you....
Then he's bullying you, verbally & physically abusing you, using you....
few years later he was abusing your children too...
Its not all at once...
its a little bit over time...
mixed in with periods of good...
You begin to feel like you are crazy...
like it really is you...
you walk on egg shells...
you pray, cry, scream, fight, give up....
Until one day the pain of staying where you are is greater than your fear of leaving.
Then...
slowly...
you rebuild yourself... you family... your life...
it takes forever...
every time you think you are over it... you get scared again...
you flashback... you remember--all too clearly...
And you are afraid again... you are afraid to trust... afraid to love... afraid to commit... to give....
But now... now you LONG for it... becuase now... now... now there is something different....
something you never tasted the whole time before...
something that lets you know you aren’t crazy....
Now... you have a life... and freedom... and choices...
So you do... you let go... you trust... a little bit more than yesterday... a little less than you will tommorow...
And you know... there will be times you are afraid... times you are haunted by your ghosts....
A a man that loves you..... will accept and understnad that....
As long as you do.
Good luck baby.... It has taken me years... and I still get scared... It just happens less often now than it did before.
2007-03-02 12:39:08 · answer #9 · answered by Jennifer Anne 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have had my mind played with over and over again. This is a form of abuse and is not easy to get over........I am working hard at it but not finding it easy. I want the person who deallt the blows to suffer and of course they wont so am stuck with negative thougts and feelings.
2007-03-01 21:59:35 · answer #10 · answered by eagledreams 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋