Move in together or get married first?

Question

Give me some input if you can.

Answer 1

Married, first.

Answer 2

Get married first! I have been there. If you live together then the guy will probably be satisfied with that and not want to get married. And why wouldn't he, he will be getting all of the advantages without the real commitment. I also believe that if a couple is married they try harder at making the relationship work. If they are just living together go through a rough patch (like everyone does) then it is to easy to say "see ya" and not try to work it out. Then they are gone for a day or so, realize they want to come back home. The back and forth is no good for the relationship. If you are married that doesn't seem to happen near as much. Just my opinion.

Answer 3

It's entirely dependent on your relationship with your boyfriend and what you both want in the future. If commitment is still up in the air right now, but not out of the question, then move in together and see if you want to commit to living together (ie. marriage). Dating and actually living with someone can be two very different things! You might love dating someone, but hate living with them. Personally, my lover and I moved in together and then decided to commit after the test run. Keep the lines of communication open to make sure you're both on the same page. If one day you decide you could be with this man forever, make it known and the same goes for him. Then commit and start planning your ritualistic party. If you decide it's just a flingy sort of thing, it's probably best to move out as soon as you know. It'll be harder on you if you end up with the latter. Take a close look at your relationship and talk to your boyfriend. Is marriage in the future or do you just need a man to cook and clean for you and someone to share the rent?

Edit: By the way, recent statistics show that living together prior to marriage is no worse than not. It used to be the opposite, but times have changed!

Answer 4

I think you have to live with someone first. We all have quirks and it is best to learn which ones your partner has in the beginning and work on your relationship before the wedding. My boyfriend and I have been living together for 7 months now and we are doing great. There is a HUGE difference though between having your honey sleep over a few nights to living together. The two of you need to find a happy balance, in regards to everything, money, chores, cleaning up, which side of the bed, etc. Especially since I lived by myself for 7 years; having a roomie was a big adjustment, not a horrible one but it takes some getting used to. Trust me.

Answer 5

For heaven's sake get married first. If you are in love enough to want to live together then trust the love and get married. Living together is for the weak and non-committed. Believe me some people never can commit. Why not give marriage a try.

Answer 6

I would get married first. I lived with mine first and then got married and and Ithink he would have been better to have married him first instead. Most of these others are right. If you live with him first he gets content and doesnt see a need to get married. He has all he wants and none of the strings attached. I think men at least some appreciate being married if you dont live with them first.

Answer 7

The norm these days is move in together and it is really called 'shacking up'. So, it depends how long you two been engaged or how long have you two known each other.

My opinion would be is to get to know the guy first for at least 2-3 years. Get engaged and set a date to be married, then live together as a husband and wife. Because when two people shack up together, they are not even close to being commited to each other, but rather than just using each other for sex and not wanting to make it right by becoming as one. Shacking up is like only two people, being married you are now one. So, if this guy has respect for you and for your body, you two wouldn't even consider shacking up or even having sex. On your part, you are not respecting yourself as a woman.

Answer 8

Okay first of all, don't listen to other people. 70% of the population here is either smart and lazy with answering, or dumb and gives stupid answers.

Now the BEST thing to do if you intend to marry the guy is to NOT move in until a WEDDING DATE IS SET. The reason is that you save rent or whatever AND by then you can vent excitement together or whatever.

Moving in earlier than that is a waste of time. He gets a housemaid, is content, and BECAUSE of the contentment, he won't really see a need to pop the question. A guy WILL know if he wants to marry you before needing to see what it's like to live with you. He's lying if he says otherwise.

To move in earlier will make him lazy in the relationship and that is NOT what you want.

Hope I helped,
Franklin

Answer 9

I believe marriage first, I wouldn't feel comfortable living together and before you know it your together 5yrs and a child later and still not married. Getting a home together and insurance benefits, Look at Anna Nichol Smith.....she can't even get buried which if she had been married the husband would have the say and also would have the child.

Answer 10

Move in together first and then get married. How long should you wait to get married, well that depends on how long you've been seeing each other. It takes on average 2 years to figure someone out. Unfortunately it only takes one date to know if you like them or not. So just remember you can like people that are not right to be your spouse, that only comes with time.