what should i do... and does anyone else feel like this
2007-03-01 16:09:30 · 11 answers · asked by jai1603 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I felt the same way when I was pregnant with my daughter. She and my son are eighteen months apart as well. However, the minute I held her in my arms for the first time I knew that I would somehow manage. The love part is easy. You'll see when it happens. The time is a bit more difficult because your newborn will consume quite a lot of your time at first. However, try and get your eighteen-month-old involved in some of the tasks. Such as, during a daytime feeding, have your child snuggle up beside you while you're feeding the baby and maybe read to them together. Or just talking to your older one about the new one... If possible, ask your husband or significant other to try and make sure they spend some special, quality time with your eighteen-month-old. Hope this helps!
2007-03-01 16:16:05 · answer #1 · answered by Jianna 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It comes after time. The good news is that newborns don't typically need a ton of verbal input, etc, so what you learn to do is to take your schedule from now, and kind of insert the new baby. As the baby gets older, she'll gradually take more time and need more intensity.
The first six weeks to eight weeks are very tough, but I know from experience that your 18 month old will probably be very enthralled with the baby, and want to be very involved. Let that happen as much as you can tolerate...because you guys will be building family time.
When my fourth child was born, I had a four year old, a two and a half year old and a 15 month old. The older two were okay with this (maybe jaded since they'd seen it all before) but the 15 month old was so very involved in the baby, wanted to hold her all the time, cuddle her, pet her when we were nursing, she brought me diapers whenever the baby cried. It was so heartwarming to see this, and now that they are eight and seven, they are BEST friends. They play together all the time, even in a huge group they stick together. People often think they are twins, and they'll play that up ;-)
2007-03-02 00:21:18 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have 2 that are 364 days apart(I have 7 total...6 age 6 and under) When the new baby arrives make a big deal about how great being a big brother/sister is. Involve the older child with the care of the baby. My kids always loved bringing me the daiper or wipes for changes. Praise the older kid for being a great helper. You will have no problem loving this baby as much as your first. It can be overwhelming at times. Especially in the beginning. But it will get better.
2007-03-02 00:56:43 · answer #3 · answered by SKITTLES 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My kids are 2 years apart and I felt this way at first, but you really do get the hang of it. Newborns sleep so much that you have a bit of time to let your older child adjust. Also try to include your 18month old in helping with the new baby - little things like holding a fresh diaper or singing to the baby. I would also suggest setting aside special alone time with each child - even something as simple as reading an extra book while the baby is napping or "cooking" something together.
2007-03-02 00:31:52 · answer #4 · answered by GatorMom 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh yes, it certainly scared me too. I ended up having 3, as in -ring-circus lol
Well, don't worry about the love part. It doesn't divide; it multiplies.
I wish the time did too! But although it's a more demanding situation timewise, somehow, they almost always take turns lol.
Seriouslly, you can hold the baby and still deal with your toddler's physical and emotional needs; and the toddler will often enough be interested enough to participate in responding to the baby.
Nonetheless, thank heavens once in a while for TV.
Congrats! Best of luck.
2007-03-02 00:21:53 · answer #5 · answered by and_y_knot 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jai,
Not to worry,..... We mom's have enough love and time for each of our children. My eldest 2 are 16 months apart age wise.. they are now 17 yrs old and 15 yrs old... I found a great way to make each of them feel extra special.. once a week while they were little I would take each one of them on an outing with me alone.. just some us time... to this day.. my 2 big boys look for that US time every week... it can be as simple as a run to the grocery store.. or trip to pick up a take out dinner...
Every night when you read them a bed time story.. rather than 1.. make it 2.. they can both choose one book... that makes each of them feel special...
I think it's just a case of nerves at the moment... we all go through it.. just do the best you can.. that's all any of us can do.. your children will grow up to know they were loved so much and that you did everything you could with them and for them.. and that's all that matter's in the end...
2007-03-02 00:18:06 · answer #6 · answered by gin_in_mi 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's a little hectic at firt but you'll get the hang of it, my older 2 were 18 months and 4 days apart, now they are 5 1/2 and 7 but are best of friends, have the same interest and it just makes things so much easier, even though it was hard going at first.
2007-03-02 00:13:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im going through the same thing.I ahve a 15 month old and im 6 months preg. honestly as a mommy well make time for the other child. Well the infant sleeps spend time with the 18 month old. I know you'll be exausted but being a mommy comes before sleep.Congratulations and good luck too you!!!!!!!
2007-03-02 00:24:50 · answer #8 · answered by amanda_shay_bauer 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You'll do it! Moms always do what is neccessary for their children to thrive. It's instict!
I had TWIN 18 month olds when I brought my youngest home from the hospital...and a husband who didn't work on top of it! He was harder to deal with than the 3 kids put together...lol.
2007-03-02 01:01:00 · answer #9 · answered by jess119mah 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes well kinda my daughter is 14 months old and im due anyday now...so yes i am scared that she wont like me anymore...im 19 yrs old and the only way is to play as much with her as possible when baby is asleep and let her be a part of it...like letting her feed him but you actually helping her ...my baby is alot younger than yours and its actually harder...but its life..
2007-03-02 00:15:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋