we both work 40 hrs a week but i always get to watch the kids while she runs around on the weekends.
2007-03-01 15:04:03 · 21 answers · asked by bubba 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The reality is that she doesn't appear to want time with just you....the kids and husband thing appear to be a task for her and her release is going out and bar hopping? I gather she doesn't read books...or do anything that is intellectual.
Bars are generally for people looking for people who they can settle down with, raise a family and snuggle whenever they have a chance....
She seems to be still looking.....maybe you should start taking the kids away for the weekend....go on trips without her....and go places that are fun...
Remember the most important parts of your family.....are the children....they need you and they don't need a mom who loves to spend her free time at a bar.
Go to Disneyland or ????? just go dude.
2007-03-01 16:12:08 · answer #1 · answered by Michael Timothy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A relationship should not just be satisfying the needs of just one of you. If yu have talked about this and her bar hopping is more important to her than your family I don't really know how you can fix the relationship.
Obviously your relationship is costing you a lot emotionally and you are not happy. Ask yourself what you are getting from the relationship compared to what you are putting into it. Possibly the price you are paying in order to stay married is too high and under these conditions you are better of getting out of it. A scary prospect but better than staying for further abuse of your feelings. You and your kids don't appear to have a wife and mother anyway, just someone who takes without giving. Getting rid of the burden may actually be easier than trying to carry that load as well.
2007-03-01 15:30:23 · answer #2 · answered by John B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why have you let this continue? Maybe you guys could get a sitter and go out together on the weekends, if she is just wanting to get out. I would tell her that you would like to spend more time with her as a family, then plan some fun family time. Or I guess you could tell her that it is time for you guys to switch off and the next weekend make plans to go out with the guys and leave her home with the kids.
2007-03-01 15:34:18 · answer #3 · answered by Kristal E 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not fair and she is taking advantage of you and your kindness. Stand up for yourself and tell her that it is not good enough and that this weekend you are going out with the boys.
You should take it in turns and also go out together for quality time, once you have someone to look after the kids.
2007-03-01 15:10:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, why is she always going out without you? Do you guys ever do anything together?
Second, why are you just sitting by and letting this continue? Speaking as someone who did this, I can say that it isn't healthy for your relationship at all. I did that, and I don't care what she tells you she's doing or why...I would suspect that she is either cheating or she will. I cheated, left, and am now on my second year of being divorced.
I think that you guys either need to begin repairing your marriage or you need to admit that its over...because its definately not working the way it is.
Good luck.
2007-03-01 15:23:22 · answer #5 · answered by hd112596 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Would it be fair if it were HER staying home with the kids while YOU ran around on the weekends? So what are you doing WHINING here? Sit down and TALK with your wife.
2007-03-01 17:33:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that being married and having kids should mean that nobody is hanging out at the bar. I've never, never seen any good come of it. It is most unfair to the kids. Time and attention that the kids need is given to folks at the bar. Time and attention to a spouse and marriage is given instead to people at the bar. Time and attention needed to build a family is spent on people at the bar. It is a setup for relationship and family failure.
2007-03-01 15:23:29 · answer #7 · answered by ozzman 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Before leaving work on Friday, call her and tell her you will see her on Sunday night because your busy this weelend and she needs to spend some good time with the kids.
It's not working when there is a steady stream of going to bars. It's not acceptable for this to continue,
2007-03-01 15:35:38 · answer #8 · answered by Nort 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you both dont go together, then neither should go. Bars tend to create horrid problems for married couples. And there shouldnt be any reason for her going. Why not approach her about this. Maybe if you ONCE left before she did, I wonder what her reaction would be. Two can play that game. But it doesnt say much for marriage, family life, and children.
2007-03-01 15:27:14 · answer #9 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow your question was like mine awhile back about hubby coming and going as he pleases. sounds like reverse rolls and i've heard about marriages that women have the dominate role instead of the man. I got some good responses. good luck.
2007-03-01 15:56:14 · answer #10 · answered by bustnloose_2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋