How do I tell him this....?

Question

Im gay. Ok, If your homophobic. Leave your worthless comments. I could care less.

I have a crush on this guy. I have for 3 years now. We go to school together, but we have no classes together so it's sorta hard for me to tell him. I don't think this is one of those High School crushes niether. I mean...its been, afterall, 3 years. I know for sure he is str8. I see him with is girlfriend all the time. We see each other all the time. Just never speak to one another. Like I said, I know he is straight, but I at least want him to know how I feel. {Oh yeah, I have a lack of self confidence. I don't think I have any self confidence} To let him know how I feel would make me feel a little better. It'd take away alot of pressure.

>_< I don't Love him. It's a crush. We talk sometimes...well, he talks, I don't. Im like....speechless. Can't speak!!!

First off. He is my friend. He knows Im gay. I just told him. He is FINE with it. and..."Me's Dirty Mouth" Yeah...Stop Stalking Me. If your a homophobe...why in the world...are you stalking a gay person?

Makes curiosity wonder.
For all you other Homophobes.
Why are you in the LGBT section.
You have a secret you'd like to share?

Answer 1

Well I tell you for what I know. I once had a crush with this beatiful guy and I told that If I tell him what I fell it would be better. But I was wrong I then felt kinda stupid. So this is my opinion be his friend and keep your little crush a secret and move on to a gay guy who want you for who you are. Trust me as sooon as he know that you like him like that he will take advantage of your good heart and kindness. Dont be stupid. Take care and Good Luck!!!

Answer 2

Since he has a girlfiriend, don't expect too much. It could just be a
cover or it could be he really digs her. Do they kiss in public, that is
---put on a show? If so, that could mean even more that he does
prefer females.

However, what I would do is...when girlfriend isn't around...ask him
if you could hang with him sometimes, cause you think he's a cool guy. If he asks what do you mean...just say you think you could become good friends if you had a chance. Don't stare and just see how he reacts. You might find he is very open to you but you could get at best a cold brush off.

If he isn't interested, try to find some other guys you like and try the same approach. If he is open, then go slowly and get to know each other. Ask him what hobbies or pastimes he has, and if
you share any of those interests, tell him. Let the friendship develop naturally. Ask him what were some of his favorite
TV shows and movies (curently, as well as in the past five years.)
If he mentions Will and Grace, Golden Girls, Scrubs you may
have a lot in common. If it's all action or dark stuff he may be
more macho and hetero. But good luck. There are guys out there
for you! You'd be surprised how many of your classmates are!

Answer 3

well, I am wondering how he would feel, and if he would feel so weird after this experience (you telling him), that there might be some kind of retaliation....
I have nothing against gay people at all, but if you know that this other guy is straight....why would you want to invade his space like this....and I am sure that it would get this "off your chest" but would it not just lead to more problems? just asking, as I have never had to deal with this before.... what is the ratio of gay to straight in your school and is your community accepting of this lifestyle? I just wouldn't want anyone to get hurt here......... if he is a good friend, maybe he will understand, but if he is not, then I don't think most young guys would really have a grasp on what was said to them and may want to start trouble with you...and also, why even bring it up.............and make him feel all weirded out..... I don't know what to say, except...good luck in your life...but I think you may have to find a gay crush

Answer 4

Let me get this straight. You want to tell someone that you do not even talk to socially that you love them? What's wrong with this picture. Gay or straight this is not exactly a good thing to spring on someone you really don't know (even if you think you do). Since he is straight, there's not a bat's chance in hell that he feels the same. And if he's not open to even thinking gay relationships are 'OK"...he may not have a good reaction (to put in mildly). The best you could hope for in this mess is that he could maybe be a friend...and if you tell him about these private thoughts of yours, you will probably alienate him completely. What really are you thinking?

Answer 5

One of the posters here, named Amber, suggests that you are invading his space by coming out to your friend. That is hogwash and makes for a very one-sided friendship. He and his girlfriend are part of your life and he has no problem demonstrating his heterosexuality, so why should you have a problem sharing who you are with your friend?

BUT, it is true that there could be some very serious, possibly even dangerous, ramifications by telling him. You don't want to lie, but you also need to pick your battles wisely. The best thing to do first is to scope out his feelings on the subject of homosexuality, to see if he is a bigot or if he is gay-friendly. Bring the subject up and see how he responds to it.

And now I'm going to give you your first lesson in self esteem. You must tell yourself and KNOW inside yourself this: there are only two things that you need from anyone, love and respect, and anyone who cannot give you those two simple things has no place in your life. You can hope for the best that he will still be your friend if you tell him, but if he should turn against you, prepare yourself in advance that you will not allow his problem to be yours. You are gay whether he likes it or not and his approval is not required, merely hoped for. Do not let your good feelings for him blind you. No matter how much you like him, if he rejects your friendship after you tell him, don't waste another second of your heart on him.

And tell your low self esteem to kiss your butt and get out of the way because you intend to have a great life, have great friends, and be happy, and one day fall in love with a wonderful person! And each time it tries to rear it's ugly head like when you are feeling depressed or bad about yourself, just tell yourself that this is only a temporary feeling, it's not the end of the world, you will go on, and that you are going to take what you've learned from bad results and make great choices next time. YOU ARE WORTHY and you are no less than any other person in the world. You have a fair shake at happiness just as anyone else no matter how people have treated you in the past. Don't over-criticize yourself, when you mess up, LAUGH at it and believe that you will do better next time. All people fail, all people fail each other, and all people fail themselves. That's life. Treat yourself good, talk good to yourself, and NEVER demean yourself - don't tolerate from yourself what you would never tolerate from others. There's nothing wrong with you, and if anyone treats you like there is, then they are the freaks. And that is the truth. Don't let what other people feel about you dictate who you are.
-Jim
www.GayChristianSurvivors.com

Answer 6

i had a crush on a guy for 2 years also and he was def. straight and i thought i would never get over him but on the 2nd year, he started to change, his nose got uglier, his hair style and changed and i was like watever. but i never told him and its a good thing too because if i did i wouldve have to deal with the ridicule from his friends and he'd probably ignore me. to cope with the butterflies, tell more of your close friends how u feel, it helps alot to let it out. so right after i got over him, i made another friend and hes like 10 times better and i can actually talk to him. but hes long gone now, havent seen him for like 4 months and hes just completely fcuked me up when he left sighh. but there are much better guys out there, our brains are just limited to know that because were so hung up!!.

Answer 7

In all honesty, if I were you, I would begin by considering a few things. Anytime you try to bring up the topic of a crush, it is important to consider the feelings of your crush, while remembering that they are a person just like you.
I would also consider, "Is this person secure enough to handle my telling them without jumping to any conclusions about my expectations of them?" It is also probably good for you to ask yourself, "Am I able to tell them without expecting any particular response in return?"
Also, ask yourself one more thing, "Should I start by saying Hi and introducing myself, before making a move to say anything about my feelings about them?"

Whatever your decision, I wish you luck.

Answer 8

I suspect you have some misguided death wish. Why would you want to do that you yourself and to him??? Letting him know how you feel would NOT make things any better for you. You know that he is dating girls, WHAT THE HECK is the matter with you??? Don't go round tempting fate, you know life is already going to be tougher for you, this situation would be easier if you would stop the fantasies.

Answer 9

If you two don't talk, it will make it hard to just go up to him and tell him. Try to run into him somewhere and strike up a conversation. If he remembers you, that's great, and you can tell him the truth right there. If he doesn't remember you, tell him anyway just to get it off your chest. But be carefully that you don;t come off as threatening as to make him angry.

Answer 10

ur gay!!Thats kool my bestfriend is gay... i love having him as a friend maybe we can be friends imme sometimes redneck_country_gurl_0607 < thats yahoo Anywayz back to your problem..
yea it's really hard to tell a guy u like them expesually if ur gay and their st8 u might get lke punched or smething ( no offence) i seen it happen befor... but if you wonna talk about this more just imme like i said redneck_country_gurl_0607 @ yahoo.com well ima bounce i hope u imme so we can talk...... i am good @ relasionship stuff so imme i will help u