Am i too young to get married????help!?

Question

hey...im 19 and my fiance is twenty.....we are engaged to be married next month but our families are kind of giving us a hard time.....they think we are to young and that our marriage is going to fail within a year....but we are truly in love and i know for a fact that we can make it work...both of us are very responsible..i practically raised my bother and sister and took care of a household for many years due to parents never home.....he has a good job, he loves children, and we settle our differences very well....and we both know "what we are getting ourselves into".....im just scared that our parents are right and we are too young...please! i need advise

Answer 1

awwwwww i got married when i was 19 too......& still married will be 4 yrs next month, as of if ur too young? only u can answer that question...... u will know when ur ready, & if ur soo happy with him & u know everything will be fine then do it, & if it doesnt work out (wish u guys the best) then thats how u will learn, thats what life is all about, is taken chances.........i did get married at 19 & have 2 boys now one whos going to be 3 soon & the other just turned 1, we have our ups & downs but we're still here & believe me my family talked sooo much **** bout him leaven me after a yr & that im too young, but look at us now still here.......anywho no one is going to make it last but u & ur fiance......soo do what u feel is right in ur heart.....good luck & good bless

Answer 2

I'm 39 and I would agree with your parents but not because I necessarily think your marriage will fail in a year. You both need to spend many more years having fun before you settle down. I got married when I was 23 and at the time I didn't think that was too young. Sure enough, a couple years later when I met some friends at work who were single and liked to go out for drinks after work, I wanted to go along and party with them, and I did for the most part. It was a big strain on the marriage and we ended up divorcing soon thereafter. I would totally totally suggest to EVERYONE not to get married any earlier than 27. Have some fun first - if you and he are meant to be together you can get married when you're older.

Answer 3

HONESTY is the start of a good marriage... It builds trust and believe us married folks, trust is something that either grows or can soon be destroyed! Be upfront with each other in all you do! Ask each other what you expect in the marriage! Many husbands took a survey and were asked what priorities they would choose in their marriage and the wives were asked the same question. The men put sex as the 3rd priority and the women put it next to caring for the garden at number 13! Ha. We are not just physically different but our brains are different. Scientists found out at around the 16th week of gestation, the male babies brain is attacked by a hormone, but not the girls. This hormone makes a male less caring and more into fact based thinking! The girl will be somewhat confused in her thoughts because both sides of her brain have caring still in them! The boy has but one side that will care. The girl will be able to multi-task better than most boys because she can use both sides of her brain to do this. The boy will be prone to make better decisions when it comes to major things in his life and in his marriage! He is not feelings oriented and the wife usually is! Hormones play an important role in this as any husband knows! OH OH, it is that time of month, again! I am in favor of the marriage, if you do your homework on what to expect and don't be so optimistic, because marriage is no bed of roses. It is hard work for both and both MUST work at it everyday! God bless you both and your marriage. Earl

Answer 4

But can you live together and make decisions together and support each other not just financially but emotionally as well?! I do not say that I am condoning living together out of wedlock but lets face it divorce is way too easy and very damaging to everyone involved. Why not put off the wedding until next year i think more time if you really love each other is just going to make your love that much stronger. And no this isnt coming from some old fuddy duddy. i am only 29 and was married at 20 myself. Practically raising children is not the same as having your own BELIEVE ME i was in the same situation as far as always raising someone for the better part of 15 years of my life, but they eventually went home to their parents. 24/7 365 is a whole nother talk show I promise. Think about this and make a deal with the families: if you can stick it out a year then not only do they need to back off they need to give you a fantastic honeymoon and be supportive of your relationship.

Answer 5

Only you know the answer to this question. If you are truly in love and the weird things that he does, doesn't drive you nuts you have a good shot of making things work. No one gets married thinking they plan to divorce in years to come but some people are more in love with the idea of being in love and not looking at all the problems that lay ahead.

Make 2 lists one for all the pros's of the two of you marrying and the cons of why we shouldn't(be truthful) and if the pros's win out go for it and God bless you. Good luck

Answer 6

If you feel your parents are right you might be too young. Be aware of how much you have changed in the last 4 years. We are constantly changing and growing as we get older. Now if you enjoy doing different things together you should be able to grow together. Just know that it is WORK to stay together. It's all love and roses in the beginning, it then becomes dirty socks and dishes. But if you respect each others ability to grow, you can do it. My parents married when they were 18 and 19 and they have been together 38 years. So it is possible. But it takes more than love. Wishing lots of love and laughter during the roller coaster of life!!

Answer 7

These days I would say yes, you're too young. I would suggest waiting until you're both out of college, have had the time to experiment a little bit, and chalk up a few hangovers so that you know without any doubts what you want in life. But if you feel in your heart of hearts that you have, then do what you think is best. It very well COULD work out between the two of you. Statistically the odds are against you, but if you two have your act together and are responsible with your decision making, then another couple of years worth of mistakes won't change anything! Good luck! Do the RIGHT thing!

Answer 8

Well you came 2 the right place for advise you will have every answer there is 2 chose from.But since you are asking than you shouldn't be getting mar===your parents or trying 2 help you . Give it some thought, Read the sites here at all the young mar=== & drama that are here
if you still want 2 get mar=== read it again,& answer the question if you have probems answering then than your not ready for mag===.Just my thought & that didn't cost you anything.Hope this helps.

Answer 9

short answer: yes, you're too young.

long answer: if you're asking complete strangers to advise you on whether or not you're ready for a life-long commitment, then you're obviously not ready. my guess is that you are just looking for someone to tell you what you want to hear. love is a funny thing. everyone seems to know what it is, but no one can ever agree on a definition. does he fulfill you cognitively, emotionally, and sexually? has sex even entered into the equation, yet? does he inspire you to live a more ethical life each and every day? is the reverse true? have you dated a lot of other guys (i do mean date, that's not a code word for sex)? if you haven't met and conversed with hundreds of other guys, how do you know what a great guy is? what do you bring to the table? are you completely honest with him? are you sure? did you tell him that you were planning on getting advice from yahoo answers? whatever you decide, know that if you're planning on having children but not adopting, you aren't ready until you have read countless books on child psychology and live a debt free life with at least 20k in the bank. if, down the road, you decide to break your promise to your life-partner, then you have done something that you shouldn't be proud of doing; however, if you bring a child into this world without surrounding this child in a committed, stable (emotionally and financially), challenging, and nurturing environment, then you have done the world a great disservice by wronging an innocent child who never asked to be born. true maturity is not something that magically happens with age, it is a conscious choice to become a responsible citizen of the planet.

nate

Answer 10

I really don't think you are too young. I'm about to turn 17, and my boyfriend and I are planning to be married shortly after I turn 18 next year.

Everyone is saying its up to you, or wait til your parents approve, and "if you're so in love, why rush?", and I agree with all of these, to a point.
It is up to you whether you go through with it right at this minute in your life, and maybe by waiting even 6 months or so might hit a chord with the parents, and they'll see that you do care about their opinions too, while still keeping your own. If I were you I'd wait til just a few more months, and get both sets of parents involved in the planning and arrangements, they may change their minds, and decide you are ready for such a commitment.

I hope this has helped you.

Love and Luck,
Em

Answer 11

I don't think your to young. In fact the norm now days is to wait until after college. Who came up with that crap? Now a days your suppose to be 40 before you have kids?? I don't understand it. Its just a mirage that society puts out for us. There is nothing more important than family, not even an education. Families are the backbone of society and if your ready to start your own family and its whats important to you than do it.
The reason why divorce happens is because of selfishness. That is always the case even if the divorce is justified. Just look at that lady who posted about how she wanted to go with her single friends and get drunk and it ruined her marriage. How selfish is that? People claim that their spouse has changed. People do change. My husband and I changed a lot since we have been married. Marriages have several phases, some good and some not so good but if your really in love you have the faith to know that things will only get sweeter with time. I got married young, 20 and had my first child at 21 and second child at 23. I don't care how many of you give me the thumbs down I do not regret it one bit. I love my life and I know that I did the right thing.