My best friend and I (we're both 14) have begun to drift apart, little by little, in the past 6 months or so.. It wasn't really noticable until about two weeks ago or so... We've been best friends ever since we were like 3.. I don't know, it's just, we're both different in some ways and alike in other ways, we've always been able to get along and even though we'd grow in different directions, we'd always still be best friends.. But now it's like we're changing growing in an even more different direction than ever before... I don't really know what to do. I can allow change and growth, and that's never been an issue, and I'm allowing her the space she needs, but I'm also there for her when she needs help and advice or just someone to listen..
But it's like she won't let me grow in the direction that I feel is right for me.. I don't know if she's just scared that we'll drift apart or what, but her not giving me space is making things harder and harder.. I've tried talking to her, but
2007-03-01 10:18:11 · 9 answers · asked by Kiara 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
it either doesn't come out right or it appears to be a misunderstanding.. I don't know.. Should I just step back and see what happens? Or try talking to her again or what..? Thanks for any advice.
Please don't tell me that I"m only 14 and I don't know what drifting apart means.. It IS a big deal to me now..Please be respectful of this. Thankx for any help..
2007-03-01 10:19:30 · update #1
I know how you feel. But the only advice I can give now is that you have to let her know that you want to stay her friend, but you also need to learn to grow in your own direction. And I know this may be hard, but if your friend doesn't let you be yourself or if she's making you be someone that you're not, then maybe she isn't the friend that you thought she was. And you may try to lie to her so she'll think that you like everything she does, but it's only going to set you apart from who you really are. It's VERY hard to leave a friend or to tell them off, but sometimes it's something that we all have to do. You will be with a heavy heart for a while, but then things will seem like they were meant to happen. Everything happens for a reason.
2007-03-01 10:24:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I wouldn't tell you just because you're only 14 that you don't have a clue...in fact, I think you're extremely smart and sensitive to this situation. You can always keep trying to talk to her, at least you'd be making an effort to resolve things. If she cares about your friendship, she'll want to keep it going and do what's necessary for that. Sometimes, kids your age are wanting to experience new things, could be good could be bad and sometimes if it's not what you're into, they'll leave you on the sidelines wondering what you did wrong. I lost my best friend to this when I was 12. She/I met in Kindergarden and never were apart. Unfort. for me lol she discovered boys earlier than I was allowed to and it upset me so much that I got jealous to the point of hurting her feelings. I regret what I did as we never were friends after that. Maybe a little time apart would be a good thing for you both..give yourselves both time to grow in your own directions while still coming together as friends.
Good luck.
2007-03-01 18:36:55 · answer #2 · answered by aweety69 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a part of growing up and I commend you for noticing that! I have a best friend and we aren't always together because we have different friends and hobbies and we still get together occasionally and we have fun for that moment and we still love each other. You have to understand that there may be a boy that she interested in or something else. I would talk to her again and this time you need to talk from the heart and let her know what is on your mind but if she still resist then just be there when she needs you but please don't stop being her friend because good friends are hard to find. You have something special that is unexpanatory to some people because they don't have it. Things will work out in the end just give it time!
2007-03-01 18:29:54 · answer #3 · answered by doodie315 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if shes your friend then she will be your friend until the day you die... if shes a good friend. Do whats best for you and not her. If you think shes stoping you from growing then shes not a good friend. Friends argue and they fight, but they don't stop each other from growing that's a fact. Be yourself for now and give her more space. Don't run back to her let her decide if she wanting to be your friend. You can't be superwoman and save the situation all the time. She has to give a little... to get a little. when she starts to change in a bad way go your separate way. that means she wasn't made to be your best friend. talk to her more about it, if shes not willing to listen then that means move on.
2007-03-01 19:15:26 · answer #4 · answered by toy toy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her some space. Find lots of friends. You'll reconnect. You are at an age when you are trying on alot of different identities and so is she. You are all trying to learn where you fit in the world. Never talk bad about her. Never put her down, even if she hurts you. Keep your end of the bargin and be the best friend YOU can be.
2007-03-01 18:22:38 · answer #5 · answered by spinster wife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to her and make a date to go somewhere as friends and reconect with her before you are not friends anymore.
I am not trying to be negetive but it might happen. Like i said just have a get together with her an reconect!
2007-03-01 18:25:26 · answer #6 · answered by Chelley 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
find way to keep in contact and if that don't work give them space.
2007-03-01 18:44:34 · answer #7 · answered by clairekansas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u cant change your friend its too late to try to wurk things out
2007-03-01 19:04:58 · answer #8 · answered by anonymous 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
NO!!! go take the path you thank is right!!!!
2007-03-01 18:25:23 · answer #9 · answered by kid 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋