Yeah, I suppose you`re gonna say don`t do that, etc. but yeah my husband will never know unless someone tells him and only a few people know so that is not likely.
Yeah, I wish I had his baby instead of my husband`s, I don`t love him that much.
So I thought this would be a great way to have the memory of my love close to me, forever.
2007-03-01 09:08:13 · 33 answers · asked by terracotta 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Baby Names
I still love the first guy and it`ll probably last for a long long time, maybe forever.
2007-03-01 09:09:41 · update #1
That thing between the brackets was meant to be (and only, so far ) :)
2007-03-01 09:12:00 · update #2
Well i don`t love him, he doesn`t love me, that`s it. We both wanted children, that`s it.
And no, my first love isn`t dead and no again, I didn`t have a relationship with him, he is married and I didn`t want to become his lover and I never will!I don`t want him to get divorced because he has children even though he doesn`t love his wife.
That is how much we respect each other.
Well, this name is like any other male name , it just means something more to me.
2007-03-01 09:25:16 · update #3
i think that's great i would do the same like u love this other guy and your husband doesn't love you so u have a memory of your love !whats the name id love to know
2007-03-01 09:35:26 · answer #1 · answered by Raman 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well, pining after a "first love" that you don't even know or have actually been with is the same as reading romance novels. They're not real - but it's great to imagine what if...?
Start reading a few juicy Harlequin novels to give that imaginative mind of yours another impossible love story to focus on. You need a creative outlet.
And then... you might even want to write a romance novel.
About a woman who pines for someone whom she's idealizing although she doesn't know him. About a woman whose husband has figured out already that something is off. But who stays with her anyway because he loves her. And because he would do anything to make her happy. And then, suddenly, the husband and the idealized "love" meet. By chance, of course. But it's a life or death situation. Our heroine is in grave danger! And so...who saves our heroine from getting kidnapped by a greedy vampire in the night? It's the husband, of course! The "love" just ducks and runs away. Because he loves his own loyal wife too much to risk his life or, worse, be unfaithful to her.
And so our heroine and her heroic husband live happily and totally into each other forever after.
Yah!! It COULD happen to you!
2007-03-01 13:37:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me begin by saying that I respect your dilemna, as well as the respect you show by not committing infidelity despite your feelings for each other. It is an unfortunate situation.
That being said, I cannot help but worry about the future implications of naming your child after this man. At some point, perhaps due to an angry outburst from the "few who know", or even yourself, you risk doing emotional harm to all parties involved:
1. Your son - how will he feel to know that his mother does not love/respect his father, and that he was instead named for her forbidden love?
2. Your husband - you must, after all, respect him enough to have married him - and enough not to cheat on him. He shouldn't be betrayed this way either.
3. Your love and his family - even though he is not the father, much drama will be created by the sudden knowledge of your son's name and reason for it.
If you look into a crystal ball, and it guarantees no one will ever know, sure, what the heck. But skeletons have a way of being pulled out of the closet. I truly think doing this will come back to haunt you.
2007-03-01 10:06:41 · answer #3 · answered by ~Biz~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is that really the legacy you want to give your child? What if your child finds out someday? How would that make your feel? You may not love your husband but please don't disrespect him and do that. You chose to marry him and he is still your husband and he deserves that much respect. This IS his child, even if you wish it was the other man's. This child will love his father and would be very hurt if one day he found out he was named after another man that you loved more than his biological father. Don't do that to your child. The truth has a way of coming out in time, usually at the most inconvenient time.
2007-03-01 11:55:13 · answer #4 · answered by LindaLou 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are so funny! I dont think it make any sense since you probably could never tell anyone (except us, of course) the signifigance behind the name. And if you do indeed stay with your husband and he finds out- which he will...than he will be crushed knowing that he wasnt your first choice. Or that you had to "settle" with him.
Imagine if your marraige blossoms...every time you say your son's name you will be forced to think of the love you lost. So do your self a favor- dont put yourself through the pain of the past. Look toward the future!
2007-03-01 11:26:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's awful. Don't name your child after your former lover. That's not fair on your child. They didn't choose for you to marry someone you didn't love as much as the person who is now your former lover or boyfriend. The child won't even look like the other man because it is yours and your husbands child. DON'T DO IT! That's really selfish of you. You wanted honest answers..there you go.
2007-03-01 18:30:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T DO IT! ONE VERY IMPORTANT REASON IS BECAUSE LATER IF YOUR FIRST LOVE'S WIFES KNOWS SHE MIGHT THINK IS HIS AND THAT WILL BE A PROBLEM. I think that if you love him you should just keep it to your self and don't tell everybody. It doesn't say anythink good about you because you married someone else and you are having a family. I really don't understand why anybody would do that if they know that marriage is for the rest of the life don't you want to be happy for the rest of your life? If your love if married and have kids you should just try not to think about him because is not helping you ok. Like you said he didn't wanted anything to have with you and you did and still do love him just keep it to your self!!!
2007-03-01 11:05:22 · answer #7 · answered by ITALY06 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think it's a good idea, i personally wouldnt do it but it is your choice at the end of the day.What if your husband did find out and you might regret it one day if your feelings for this particular person change, which in my experience chances are they will, i used to have deep feelings for my first love when we split but now he's just a distant memory.Naming your child is a big decision as the name will stay with it for the rest of its life, also think about how the child will feel if he find's out he was named after your first love.Think about it properly before you make any decision.
2007-03-01 11:38:53 · answer #8 · answered by Zanaie02 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess it is hard to let go of the past. Tell me about it. I was with my ex for four years and now I am preg with my current bf. I love him but not as much as my ex. I guess if you would like to name him after your true love go for it but think of the consequences. What if your husband finds out? Will he be happy? Will he want a divorce? Think about it and good luck with your decision.
2007-03-01 11:47:14 · answer #9 · answered by almost there 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How would you like it if your father had named you after someone he desired, who your mom didn't even know about? I wouldn't like it, myself -- seems like a way to use your child as the container for your frustrations. Which is a bad pattern to get into. Sorry if that sounds harsh, I know it's not the answer you want, but I'm sure you realize I'm being honest. I know how you feel about your desire not being your husband -- but remember the grass is always greener, and life's what you make it.
2007-03-01 10:54:57 · answer #10 · answered by zilmag 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh honey, what a tangled web. No, do not name your child after another love...the pain of saying his name everyday for the rest of your life will not be good. DO NOT HAVE KIDS WITH A MAN YOU DON'T LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!! You will mess up the poor kids. Wouldn't you like to teach your kids that love and marriage is about RESPECT for eachother and your vows? Look into adoption. get a divorce. START OVER. you owe it to yourself and those you love.
2007-03-01 13:07:30 · answer #11 · answered by Mary J 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋