We met about15 months ago fell in love with each other but went no further, never went to bed either. We remained best friends, we talked alot about the future, being together etc. I am always there for her and I mean anytime. 2 months ago her husband ended the marriage and they will be separated. She still needs me but all talk about being together in the future has almost stopped. She is distancing herself from me emotionally. But I still am her best friend and will help her in any way she needs after the separation. I guess my question is, Is this normal for her to push me away emotionally and still hang on to my friendship, is this temporary. I do love her dearly and I am willing to wait it out, but lately have been losing hope about the way she feels about me.
2007-03-01 04:31:46 · 12 answers · asked by lettinggo2006 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
An emotional relationship with a married woman likely contributes to further marital difficulities in her marriage which may lead to divorce. She may be connecting the dots and realizing her poor choices, and yours, helped contribute to a divorce.
2007-03-01 04:36:14 · answer #1 · answered by AF 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I don't think she is ready to step into another relationship with you and that is why she is distancing herself from you. It is too soon and she is still hurting. That may be why she is distancing herself from you emotionally. She is trying to tell you that she cares about you, but she cannot commit right now. If I were you, I would take a few steps back and give this lady some room to heal and get her act together. Tell her that you understand that she is hurting alot and that she is confused, but that you love her and you will always be there for her if she needs you and when she is ready you will be there to love and protect her. Call her occasionally but don't see her right now. She is going through alot. She still has to go through a divorce...there is alot of time. Wait it out...You will know whether or not she cares after a while. If it doesn't blossom into a future committed relationship with her, keep her as a friend.
2007-03-01 04:42:35 · answer #2 · answered by cardgirl2 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to be there for this woman as much as possible. I am currently going through a divorce as well and my friends are my one hope of sanity. There are days that you go through so many different emotions. You try cleaning up the house and as you put things away it brings back part of the past. Even when a marriage is ending you remember the happy times you once had. There are times you think that trying to make things work would be so much easier. You cry when you are happy and cry when you are sad. I currently have someone else I am in love with as well and I don't believe I have been pushing him away but everyone deals with things differently. Be there for her as her best friend until things are said and done. When the stress has passed and she can begin the healing process i believe she will turn around. If not then it is not meant to be and you should try to remain friends but move on with your life too. Somtimes things happen for reasons we don't understand. Maybe this happened because she just needed your support and you guys are going to fall in love with different people. Hang in there and be there for her as much as possible. In the end you will find out if your feelings are returned. My bestfriend will tell you it was worth the wait for him.
2007-03-01 04:46:02 · answer #3 · answered by Jenn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't push the subject fo the future.. .Going through a divorce is a VERY hard time..okay? She needs you to be there for her, as a good, close, understanding FRIEND.. Don't make a move, don't kiss her, don't do anything like that... Wait and be there for her, and don't make a move until you now for sure that she's moved on and ready.. Otherwise it'll ruin your chances of this working out.. Be a good friend for now, and you said you are willing to wait it out, so do so.. It is normal for her to push you away emotionally, as this is a very difficult situation and time for her right now.. She still loves you, I'm sure of that, just be patient and kind and understanding.. Because what she needs right now is a really good friend.
2007-03-01 04:36:33 · answer #4 · answered by Kiara 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt you are in love. Maybe infatuation, maybe lust, but probably not love.
The most loving thing you can do is encourage her to work out her issues in the most loving and moral way possible.
If that means divorcing a man who will not keep his vows, then wait for her to divorce. If she is a contributing factor to the marital issues, encourage her to get her own side of the two way street called marriage clean before she calls it quits.
If, after she has done all of that, her marriage still ends, you will not possibly have the guilt of possibly breaking up a marriage that may have been savable.
I still believe you are in love with the idea of love, and not in love with her. I believe it's dangerous for you to consider the idea of friendship at this point as it may put her marriage in peril.
2007-03-01 04:38:49 · answer #5 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is confused right now because her marriage ended. She is weighing things and may need some space to think clearly. Respect her need to be alone. l'm sure she appreciates your presence as a good friend and a shoulder to cry on. Give her a month or two to sort out her life.
Who knows, she might call on you one of these days. Try not to pressure her on a serious relationship as some scars are still fresh from the previous one. Good luck.
2007-03-01 04:44:30 · answer #6 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seeing your household decrease back jointly is not at all going to ensue in case you proceed this affair with the different female. there are truly some awesome human beings accessible that you'll likely fall in love with. you're allowing your self to be tempted. strengthen a pair and concentrate on your dedication, Dude. you're youthful. you do not yet have many factors from which to charm to with the intention to make a wedding ceremony artwork. develop into conscious of the themes and deal with them one after the different. in simple terms because you do not see ideas does no longer advise that there are none. Sheesh! provide up operating remote out of your issues. Be a guy of integrity and honor your vows.
2016-12-05 02:42:35 · answer #7 · answered by lesure 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friend, it hurts me to say it, but she is going to dump you for sure. I think you are in the middle of the oldest story there is: 'Wait for me.'
Nobody is 'nearly separated', in the way that no-one is 'nearly pregnant'. You either are or you aren't. And clearly, she isn't. She has a lot of hills to climb yet before she can say to you a definitive 'Yes' or 'No'. But, if she were really serious about you, she would have done that before now. So, looks like you are going to get very badly burned by this woman. Hope you survive through it all.
Good luck.
2007-03-01 04:36:19 · answer #8 · answered by Superdog 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
She is in a very difficult time in her life right now. Wait for her.
She may be distancing herself because she doesn't want to jump right in after her separation. Let her know you are there in any way she needs you to be. Give her time and support.
Good Luck.
2007-03-01 04:37:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Even if a seperation or divorce is what someone has talked about, when it comes down to it and it actually starts happenig it is normal for them to go through a period of many different emotions. She is hurting and scared and confused, even if this is what she wanted, its a tramatic thing to go through. Right now she is just trying to get through it. Be there for her but don't mention your relationship at all. Just let her know that you are there for her if she needs you. Its hard for others to understand unless they have been through it. But it just takes time.
2007-03-01 04:47:47 · answer #10 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋