I don't know if it's just me; but, I don't like people borrowing my car unless it's a absolute necessity. For instance, my wife will ask to borrow my car for no particular reason. I'll share everything else with her even my car if she needs it ... but she doesn’t. I don't ask to borrow her car, and I won't ever borrow her car unless I absolutely need it and all other options are out. I mean, if her car is broken down, or out of gas, I wouldn’t hesitate to tell her to take my car for the day. I just don't like it, the last time she borrowed my car, she got in a wreck and my car was in the shop for over three months because of it. How do I tell her that I don't like it without hurting her feelings? It's just a person's car is a person's car... am I making sense? Once as nicely as possible I told her and she got real mad. Saying, "I love the car more than her". It wasn't even that, it's just something to call my own. It used to bother me alot; but, not as much now. I still makes me grrrr.
2007-03-01 04:11:30 · 23 answers · asked by plop p 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's a BMW
2007-03-01 05:02:30 · update #1
time your use just before she needs it..anticipate it well.....can you please answer my question......Can you help me?Ibibo.com BLOGGING FRAUD.
2007-03-01 04:14:29 · answer #1 · answered by s g 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Just come forward. The same way you told us tell her, perhaps in a letter. I think your in title to something to call your own. It's not like your wife don't have a car to drive. She wrong to try to take that one thing you really like and enjoy. I believe you love your wife in all, but you need to really stand up as a man first. At this point I know this might sound mean, but you need to NOT care if it hurts her feelings, oh well. Am a women and am telling you this, your wife is to controlling over your things. And you need some back bone.I know you said you don't like to hurt her feelings, but sir if you do, she will get over it. And those dumb comments she makes that "you love that car more then her" bypass that, let her throw her baby fit. Don't live another day with out your car. And if she has keys to your car take them in hide them just an case of emergency. And if she ask you for them or your keys, just say nicely take your car and calmly walk away. If she starts acting childish turn her off, she will get the message. You need to get her to know your serious or other wise she going to step all over you again and again and again. Be all the man you can be. I know you can.
2007-03-01 04:34:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I think you need to stop letting it bother you.
I would work towards the middle. It's a car after all, not a person. (And I'm a car fanatic, so I believe I get where you come from.)
Explore what it would take for you to be enthusiastic about sharing the car.
Does she leave it with trash in the car, no gas in the tank, etc. Or is it just a control thing with you?
Because if it's something she can address, such as filling it up, or taking her trash with her, then I believe it's reasonable to ask her about that. However, if it's just your fears, get over yourself, it's just a car.
When you married, everything became ours. Our house, our cars. That's what marriage is, a team effort.
It isn't your car. It may be the car you drive the most, but it belongs to both of you.
Act accordingly.
2007-03-01 04:21:06 · answer #3 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
tell your wife its about her respecting you period. If she has her own car and like you said if nothing is wrong with it then you have the right to not want her driving your car. By being your wife she should respect your property simple. Its not that big of an issue.. She needs to respect your property and use her own car now if something is worng with her car thats different. But you shouldnt even have to give her no explanation period she should respect that cuz its not like u asking for alot just for her to drive her own car
2007-03-01 04:20:39 · answer #4 · answered by Im da Example 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-09-30 01:38:24 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all
DO NOT let/make her think its because of the whole "Women driver" thing.
Ask her why she likes your car more then hers
Also is your car flasher, faster then hers? because alot of people would prefer to drive in a flash fast car,
you could also try telling her you dont want her to get hurt again and maybe shes not safe driving around in your car (Try to make it sound like its the car, not her that needs to stay away from the other)
Well hoped this helped even a little bit :)
Cya
2007-03-01 04:20:17 · answer #6 · answered by b.ugmafia 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Fine, tell her, although I think this is a bit retentive.
Dude, it is a CAR. You want a car to come between you and your wife? In addition, it might be a hint that she's not happy with her car. Consider shopping for a new one if this is the case. You'll never know unless you talk to her.
2007-03-01 04:17:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
you say that it used to bother you more, It still makes you grrr. So if you just keep that thought in time it will become grr. the gr., then g., , and the last g will be for GO ahead take the car honey.
Its not like it is all the time, but I know what you mean. If thats the way she thinks that you show your love, its still allot easier than arguing about it.
Peace and harmony, ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.
2007-03-01 04:22:16 · answer #8 · answered by michelebaruch 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't play games or think up ways to avoid this issue. She is your wife and deserves your complete honest. Sit her down with a glass of wine and a gift, the gift is important, and explain to her why your car is so special to you. She may not listen to your words when you say you love her but....but she will be holding on the present you gave her as a token of your love and, if you married the right girl, she will understand.
Were I her, and you explained it to me this way, I would probably give you a gift certificate for a complete auto detailing on the next gift giving occasion.
Make it a very nice gift and a good bottle of wine. Then take her out to dinner, in your car.
2007-03-01 04:23:28 · answer #9 · answered by Liligirl 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Charge her 33 cents per mile with added fees if the car comes back dirty or in disrepair. Okay, that might hurt her feelings, but maybe if she uses that "You love your car more than me" line, you can throw it back at her, since she loves to borrow your car so much. This probably isn't very constructive, but if she's a) borrowing your car when she has one, b) wrecks your car, and c) complains that you love a machine more than you love her, this woman has psychological/esteem issues up the yin yang. She sounds incredibly needy. Good luck, man. By the way, what kind of car is it?
2007-03-01 04:17:36 · answer #10 · answered by pokecheckme 4 · 3⤊ 3⤋
It is better not to appear to be possessive about ur car particularly with ur wife. Regarding her carelessness, if u find it is due to her casual approach better be frank with her rather than showing rudeness on the basis of ur ownership of the car.
2007-03-01 04:45:00 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋