ok so its not so much the names, 2 months before i found out i was pregnant his uncle died very suddenly, he went into a diabetic coma and passed away. 3 days after my grandfather died i found out i was pregnant. we discussed that if it was a boy there was a possibilty of 2 MIDDLE names after his uncle and my granda. so we went out to lunch with the his aunt (bereaved) and he told her i was pregnant and if it was a boy its first name would be after her husband. she got all emotional and i didnt have the heart to start anything, she was telling me how much it meant to her bla bla bla. now i feel soooooo bad that im angry about this and ive talked to my partner and he said he misunderstood what i meant.
i dont know how to sort it so that we are both happy with the name and so as not to hurt anyone. i feel so guilty but i also feel i might be over reacting too.
2007-03-01 02:11:04 · 16 answers · asked by Şơƥɦɨȩ'ȿ ♡Μυɱ˗Μυɱ♡ 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
the names are james - his uncle and either ronald or robinson - my grandas first and middle names
2007-03-01 02:27:49 · update #1
it not the specific names that are the problem, its him telling her that and me feeling guilty about saying well actually no i know your still cut up about your dead husband but we're not gonna use his name as a first name after all
2007-03-01 02:32:21 · update #2
ugh, id be upset too...my fiance is always telling people things like that, and it irritates the crap out of me! they mean well though...try not to let your pregnancy hormones be too harsh on him like ive done! maybe your grandfathers name could be his first name? and the uncles name the middle name...or vice versa. if not, maybe two middle names would work...
2007-03-01 02:21:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't get yourself all worked up. Its not good for the baby or you. Just relax. Now, first of all, your stupid husband should not have told his aunt that the baby was going to be named after his uncle when you guys have not made the decision yet. That was very wrong on his part. Don't feel guilty. Here's an idea. You can give the baby 2 middle names. A lot of people do that. Talk to your hubby about it and see if likes that idea. Also, you need make it clear to him that with you being pregnant, he doesn't need to be stressing out all of the time. Im trying to scare you but if you are under a lot of stress it can cause a miscarriage so please take it easy. I have a 6 month baby girl. My mom and friends had to warn me about that in the beginning pregnancy because I was freaking out. Take care!
2007-03-01 10:24:44 · answer #2 · answered by KokoQueen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully it will be a girl! :)
But seriously. Wait until all the emotion dies down. That is sweet of you to tell his aunt that if it is a boy, you will name it after her husband, but it is SO not worth arguing with your honey over something like that. What is the name? Do you even like it? Can you say it day after day? When he is born, whatever name(s) you pick ahead, you may not even feel "fits" him all that well. Take a step back from the situation. The two middle name thing is a good idea - could do both grandpa and aunt's husband... then the first name of you and Dad's choice.
My husband's name is Wallace (mom's name choice) Albert (an uncle) Enright (grandpa) Dittrich. My name is Angela (mom's name choice) Marie (aunt who died 2 weeks before my birth) Barrick.
2007-03-01 10:22:13 · answer #3 · answered by Angie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What are the names?????
2007-03-01 10:19:32 · answer #4 · answered by Peacen 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I wouldn't be so stressed out about it-he made a mistake at least he admitted that he misunderstood. names today are so open and range that you don't only need to have one but two or more or you might even consider trying to combine the two.l you guys still have a long way to discuss options and figure things out don't get to angry all ready you have a ways to go.
I understand your frustrations though-we had are boys named picked out from day one basically-we came up with it right after our daughter was born two years ago and then when i hit 28 or so weeks he said he isn't sure if he wants that name, now I'm at 33 weeks and he isn't telling me which direction he wants to go.
just stay calm he said he misunderstood the conversation-talk it out, and if you can't agree either way don't use either then it will be fair on both parts. you may have to agree to disagree and come to terms with completely different names. hey you could be argueing over something that there is no need to-might be a girl right
2007-03-01 10:24:31 · answer #5 · answered by emery_sage 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Use both names and relax. If you are not comfortable doing that tell his aunt that you think it was a little strange using her late husbands name and you wanted to spare her the grief ( tell her before the birth of the baby)
I pray all goes well. Like someone mentioned before maybe you'll have a girl!! Problem solved. Don't stress so much. Try to enjoy your pregnancy.
2007-03-01 10:25:18 · answer #6 · answered by Da Queen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Names are hard. Exspesialy for boys. We didnt have a named picked out till about the 7th month. We argued for the first 5 months LOL. So please just take ita ll with a grain of salt and worrrie about it as the time gets a little closer. You do not need the added stress a tthis time. 18 weeks pregnant, you still got a ways to go. Enjoy it!
2007-03-01 10:25:05 · answer #7 · answered by BOOTS! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First find out if it's even a boy (maybe you'll get lucky and have a girl!). If it is, figure out what you and your husband REALLY want to name it. If it's first name is not going to be after his uncle, explain this to his aunt BEFORE you have the baby. I'd suggest giving the kid his uncle's name as a middle name like you were originally thinking. Tell his aunt that you want to honor her late husband, but you chose a first name that you feel is less depressing.
2007-03-01 10:18:02 · answer #8 · answered by Rwebgirl 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What I would do is just be honest with her. Tell her you are sorry about the mis-communication, but what your husband told her is not what you both had decided on. Tell her you know how much it means to her, and that you still would like to have her husband's name a part of your boy's. I bet you anything that she will still be happy and flattered that you are going to do that. But don't get too stressed over it.. Who knows? It could be a girl!!
2007-03-01 10:21:23 · answer #9 · answered by tmac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have seen this before. Just take a deep breath and I know the two of you want your child to have a very meaningful name. Use the names for a first and middle name maybe. But you have plenty of time to think about it.
2007-03-01 10:19:50 · answer #10 · answered by lorisbarbie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋