How can I stop negative thinking?

Question

I don't know what I should do about this. I am always thinking about the bad things that happened to me and It always make me down. I can stop this thinking only when I am very very busy. Now I try to make myself busy on the time. I know this is not a good idea but I don't know the better way to stop this. Please help me.

Answer 1

You are right that it is not a good idea to make yourself busy all the time. (You should listen to your feelings more - they will show you the way to Your Truth.) This is because even though you try to ignore the bad things by keeping busy, the bad things are still there - like ghosts haunting your life. And even worse, more bad things could hit you while you are so busy trying to stay busy. Then, you will have bad things both in the Past & Present.

1) Your Future Life will happen... because of your Present Life.

You say, "I'm always thinking about the bad things that happened to me." If you always think about the bad things from the past... then what will happen in your future? Most likely, more bad things will occur... because you are too busy looking backwards in the wrong direction.

You need to start thinking about the Present & Future... about how to live your life now, so that fewer bad things - and more importantly, more good things - will happen in the Future. Because of the Past, You are exactly where you are now in the Present. But in the Future, you will be wherever you are..... because of what you choose to do now in the Present.

It is OK to remember the Past and to Learn from it, but it is more important to Accept & Take what we learned, and use it so that we can create & live a Better Life in the Present & Future.

But, before you move to the Future, it is often helpful to Understand our Past...

2) There are Positives Inside the Negatives.
The Past is Your Teacher - all the Experiences of your Life, whether they were Positive or Negative, can teach you something, both about Life & your Self.... so, if all these Experiences have Lessons inside them,.... then they are also Gifts.

So, you should Study your Past Experiences. Do not focus on how bad they were, but try to discover what you learned from it, and what Good(s) did come of it.

3) An Example from my own life -
Since you did not describe the bad things that happened in your life, I will use my own as an example. Throughout my schoolhood years, I felt lonely, unhappy, and angry at life & the world for circumstances that I did not choose. I was stuck in my Life, and the only way I could escape was with my Mind - dreaming about a better future. I felt no one understood me, that no one loved me - not even my parents, who I knew loved me in their Own Way, but that Way was not a Love I could feel. They loved me because I was Their Son - not because of who I was inside, so they made little effort to understand & support the Real Me. And to this day, they still do not Know how, even though they have tried before. And during that those many years, Nobody came to Love or Understand or Care.

What are the Positives I gained from this? Well, I learned that Love truly is the most important thing in the world - because I had felt & experienced no love, I realized that without it, you can die inside your heart... I almost did. And I also learned that Love is not just a Feeling in your Heart (which my parents had), but also a way of Thinking in your Mind, and a Being in your Soul.

That if you truly wish to Love another person, you also need Understanding - or at least, to try & understand. I learned that Feelings are very important, because they are the Messages of the Heart, which show you how close or far away you are from Love & Happiness. I learned that many people, when they love, they only love what they want to love about that other person - and not because of who they are as a Whole Person.

I learned that, since Nobody came into my life at that time to deliver Love, that I would have to give it to my Self if I wanted to live,... and to grow it in my Heart, if I wanted to be Happy. And then I learned later, that Love cannot simply remain inside one's Heart, because if one wishes to keep Love, they must Share it with Another & Others, & Give it Away. So, I am very grateful for all these things I learned about Love, and my Life has been better because of it. If it had not been for my Past, perhaps I would have taken love for granted, and not seen its true Value.

So, if you find your Self compelled to dwell on the Negatives, perhaps this means your Heart desires you to discover the Positives inside the Negatives. If you continue to Ignore & Push Away the Negatives, then you will not discover the Positive Gifts that they hold within them. You may need to reflect, search, & dig for a long time - but don't give up. When you do discover them, it is then that the Negatives no longer appear as complete Negatives, but also as Positives as well.

Many believe that looking at the bright side & looking towards a better tomorrow means ignoring the Night, and waiting for the Sunlight of the Day to arrive. But even the darkness of the Night has its gifts, for it is only in darkness that we can enjoy the beauty of the Stars. And how can we enjoy the stars, but we must use our own Hearts & Souls.

I sincerely hope that some of this may be helpful for you - if you wish to email me about anything, you are welcome to do so!

i wish you the best

Answer 2

Is negative thinking something that should be washed away with the bad memories that trigger them? Or do the represent issues that remain unresolved.

Society tells you to censor negativity. That's because modern society is bent on consumerism, and salesmanship means wearing the plastic smile. Put a bandaid on a cancer and call it a day.

One of the best ways to deal with negativity is to learn not to run away from it. If you don't, you'll never learn to get to the root of it, and you'll always be in your rut. One of the best ways I've learned to deal with mine is to use creative outlets. You could take up writing, creatively, or as a diary. Either way, it works like a release valve.

Answer 3

We're philosophers, not psychologists.

What if what is to be thought only is evaluatively negative? If it's true that, for instance, you've wasted your life on some banal task or etc., you want us to further help you to repress that fact?

Because you should know by now that lack of candor, lack or perspective, lack of negative thinking is what is most likely causing you to think in the way you are at the moment. This may very well be your moment of clarity and you're missing it. Act accordingly. Face it.

Answer 4

I know that this sound silly but there is a book called the course in miracles that can show you how to do this.

It worked so fast on me that I thought something was wrong with me. I had had the negative thoughts controlling me for so long that it seemed like something was wrong when they disappeared.

It works try it.

Its been 9 years without them, and I don't miss them a bit.

Love and blessings Don

Answer 5

As soon as a negative thought comes into your mind, say STOP aloud to yourself and then replace that thought with only good and positive ideas. Good luck

Answer 6

Have you always felt this way? If so you won't change. However a psychologist and a psychiatrist can help.Antidepressant drugs can help. Positive people won't even know what I'm talking about. They can't help you. However if you were a positive person who changed then I can't help you.

Answer 7

Keeping busy is a good option.... a better option is to be busy in activities that you yourself believe to be good... that enhances self esteem and thus kills negative thinking.

Answer 8

got out TODAY and purchase the book :The Power of Positive Thinking by Dr. Vincent Peale - you will never be the same again after reading it.

Good Luck

Answer 9

Maybe a good way would be not to stop them, but let them go. I know it is not easy. Wish all the best.

Answer 10

dear! remember the huge GOD that you have, not small problems that you had. keep yourself beasy in a good ways, like reading useful books and dont forget to exercise,it really helps you to think positive and controling your mind.
good luck