I have been divorced for just over three months, been seperated for over a year. My husband is now dating a younger girl (she is 18, he turns 23 on Friday) but we still talk often. I still love him very much and I know it sounds like I'm in denial (and yeah, I know to a point I am) but I know sometime we will get back together. We're just friends now and I'm fine with that. Should I send him a card? Would it be inappropriate? I'll go either way, I just would have to send it today to get it there on time, haha. I just dont want him to think I'm the crazy stalker girl I have been in the past...
2007-02-28 22:44:37 · 28 answers · asked by Laura 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I counted it up, its almost 50/50 on if I should or shouldnt, haha. I should add, I never full on "stalked" him. But for nearly a year it was simply impossible for me to move on, I was very very in denial about everything. I am leaning towards not sending anything, I did just see him two days ago. I know he has plans with his GIRLfriend (sorry, it just bugs me that shes still in high school) so I probably should just respect that, right? Maybe leave a friendly MySpace comment? He only signs in like once a month anyway, so one single comment would seem normal, right? I just wanted to thank everyone for answers, I'll leave this open while I think about it more :)
2007-02-28 23:54:13 · update #1
If you've been a "crazy stalker girl" in the past, I urge you not to send that birthday card.
2007-02-28 22:47:35 · answer #1 · answered by kja63 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sure, send him one. It'll drive the new girl friend nuts but who cares. I got along great with my ex when we didn't have to live together and we did a lot of nice things for each other even after he remarried, even went on trips together that the #2 wife still doesn't know about. We exchanged gifts for holidays until he got sick and finally passed away in Dec. I was on one side of his bed and #2 was on the other and it was her choice that I be there. She had nothing to do with the divorce so she actually had my sympathy during the years she lived with him. LOL Give him the card and see how it lands.
2007-03-01 06:53:24 · answer #2 · answered by moonrose777 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with sending a card, just make it a friends card and simply sign it. Do not get into a big discussion or state your feelings for him. That way it will not appear that you are still stalking him.
2007-03-01 07:18:25 · answer #3 · answered by Mike S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the 2 of you still are friends and you don't think you are going to cause a problem with them, then I don't see why not. Go for it let him know that you still care or that you are still his friend. Make it simple though, no lovey mushy type of card.
2007-03-01 06:49:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with sending him a Birthday card and then keeping up a friendly relationship with him.
2007-03-01 07:12:14 · answer #5 · answered by Stareyes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are still on quite decent terms with each other, then yes. And also as long as you don't write something about your past in it - that could be dodgey. Just an innocent happy birthday and then if anyone gets iffy about it, you knwo it's their problem, not your, because you did nothing wrong!
2007-03-01 06:49:28 · answer #6 · answered by Domina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah gurl!!! thats alright to send a birthday card..i dont see why not...well you still have something in the past and your still freinds now...well i hope that someday you guys will get back together..if you still love him and he loves you..sounds corny but I'm a hopeless romantic... muah!! good luck gurl!!!
2007-03-01 06:55:00 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've read your question Laura......and it raises so many issues that I just can't go there. Sorry.
Don't send the card is what I'd say. I don't want to go into the reasons.
2007-03-01 06:49:54 · answer #8 · answered by lou b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a good idea...why send mixed signals. It's over. He has moved on and you should too. I don't believe in this "we're friends" stuff. It is mere tolerance even when kids are involved. Stop kidding yourself.
2007-03-01 07:33:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey laura, if ur still hung up over him, but he's carried on with his life, dnt send him a card. Think only of yourself at this point. I know, saying is easier than doing.
But if you were wished by him by some means on your b'day by him, during this time you were separated...then at you can wish him. But it still is your choice.
2007-03-01 06:51:28 · answer #10 · answered by angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋