My husband still talks with his old girlfriend after all the years 21, she never calls the house or come over when she's in town, he does the calling and going over to see her, he said it's innocent and that they are friends I stated have her come to the house and talk with us but no. This is the same girl he was with the day his daugther was born. He has admitted that they have had conversation that they should have had. But he said he values her friendship and will stay there well over 4 hrs. I get so mad everytime.
2007-02-28 20:54:28 · 14 answers · asked by new me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Tell him next time he sees her not to bother coming home....
2007-02-28 22:05:00 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
This is not complicated. You have not really posed a question but i will give you an answer. Your husband is openly disrespecting you by seeing this other woman, while he knows it makes you uncomfortable. You may want to sit him down and let him know how his actions are affection your marriage, and that by continuing a relationship with a former lover will ultimatly end on bad terms for everyone. It is completely justified that you are angry at your husband for carriying on in this way. I think your husband may feel trapped and that he could be looking to his former girlfriend as an escape from reality. Try talking things out first, but if he persists you can give him an ultimatum to choose yourself or this old love.
2007-02-28 22:24:20 · answer #2 · answered by "the Otter" 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt he would like if it the tables were turned and were the one with the ex-boyfriend. It sounds like you have every right to be suspicious; if he were on the up and up and she were "just a friend" neither he nor she would have any problem with her coming to your home when you are there...as he is always going over there and even went there the day his daughter was born, that is a huge red flag. At best, is he cheating emotionally, at worst, physically also.
You need to decide if you can continue to live with this sitution or not before issuing an ultimatium for him to see her anymore if he wants your marriage to work as he may chose her. If you are not ready to take it to that level, just start hanging out more with your family and friends and make new friends, new male friends and slowly distance yourself from this man.
2007-02-28 21:07:07 · answer #3 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is innocent, why won't she come over to your place? Is she uncomfortable around you? If so, she may have feelings for your husband. You need to have a serious talk with your husband about this and let him know it bothers you. Speak calmly about the subject and tell him if their friendship is so innocent then she can come over to your place. If she won't then tell him you will go with him to her place. But to be honest it sounds theres more to their so called friendship than he's telling you. If u can, find out somehow. This isn't the best advice but I hope it helps. Take care.
2007-02-28 21:06:14 · answer #4 · answered by Dr. Phyll 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is total disrespect to you, and how would he feel or what would he think if the shoe was on the other foot? and you even said for her to come over, well there's nothing wrong for women and men to be friends, but the way he goes about this is looking like he is hiding her and maybe is cheating...and to be with her on the day your child is born instead of being with you... would not tolerate any of this if I was you...
2007-02-28 21:09:27 · answer #5 · answered by Renee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Shorty, What the HELL does your husband think he is doing!!! Does he really think you are going to believe they are only friend!!! Wake-up and smell the roses. You are not his door mat to wipe his feet on. You need to lose your husband and move on. He is not the person you believe he was. I am very sorry you had to go through something like this.You really deserve a lot better treatment than you are receiving from this a s s h o l e... Move on and have a much better life. A Friend.
Clowmy
2007-02-28 21:23:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not blame you for being mad and hurt! I would be.
It seems they are to cozy and friendly and I am AMAZED that he thinks this should be ok with you.
You should be 1st, you are his wife and you should be his best friend and he should be yours. Not an ex and he should never be afraid to bring her over, tell him that looks bad. I think it is nice for you to even invite her over personally!!!
When you are married your marriage comes 1st.
I would tell him it is time for marriage counseling. See what a professional 3rd party thinks on this and it may help.
You should come first, it is nothing to do with trust. It is normal for a woman not to want her husband, the man she loves to be with his ex alone for hours.
Good luck and I hope my thoughts helped a little.
2007-03-01 00:31:34 · answer #7 · answered by Ann 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's disrespectful. He won't allow the two of you to meet for a reason. Just to reassure you that nothing funny is going on, he shouldn't have any problems with all of you hanging out together sometimes.
2007-02-28 20:59:19 · answer #8 · answered by ßαßε 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
same situation over here. don't worry about it i know it is hard but do worry about it. let him know how you feel is the only good thing to do and he can fix it or leave it....
2007-02-28 23:43:58 · answer #9 · answered by Sonya 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him you trust him... but you dont really know her so how can you trust her. tell him your angry cause your madly in love him and it hurts you to see him hanging out with his ex girlfriend alone at her house for 4 hours. remind him he picked you not her.
2007-02-28 21:00:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋