My ex left me to be with the mother of his child a one night stand before we met. NOW, when I was with him he was depressed even suicidal about this, I was there for him unconditionally. I told him he should have been a part of his child life. But get this, when he went to meet the child he developed strong feelingd for the mother. She made it very clear she wanted him and that he missed out on his childs life for 2 yrs. He turned so cold to me and acted like I never existed and even more so, he talked about me and devalued me. NOW, I pretty much saved his life, brought him to his daughter and look at how I got treated. I told him off in every way, and he wants nothing to do with me. HE and the mother of his child are no longer an "item", but they remain freinds and when I tried to confront him about us, somehow she meddles in and calls me to defend him>>?! They are not together because he found out she lied to him about some serious things about her childhood. WHY is he still
2007-02-28 17:40:36 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
defending her, they are like allies. And he can hurt me so badly. SOmeone who was there for him. I dont get it. ITs been months now and we dont speak. I feel like she manipulate him in a way, but even though she showed her true colors, he still remains friends with her, b/c he tells her everytime I called him and so on. I feel like she won in the end, maybe she didnt get him, but she destroyed our relationship. I thought for sure he would understand what her intentions were and what she was all about, after some time. I am just hurt still and very confused. I cry alot because I dont understand. We never fought, had a great relationship, besides his depression. He was caring, and respectful to me, until he went back to that situation. IT just hurts. WIll I ever hear from him again, I guess I just want him to realize it was wrong & an apology. Please dont judge me and tell me do you care,he messed with my head, all the suicide talk and then to act like it never mattered.
2007-02-28 17:42:20 · update #1
I dont have that I need to be a "hero" issue. thats not why i helped him, i told him he should talk to a professional about his depression but he wanted to talk to me, and he scare me several times. He even planned it out, I tried my best to help him because I cared about his life. Would you walk away?? And if he did kill himself how would you feel?? It was horrible. I feel he did mentally abuse me. I did go for therapy. I just want respect and acknowldgement for what he did, he is alive and well now and plays these messed up games. IfI knew he was a player, I would have never allowed myself to be out in the sitaution. He told me it was a mistake, this one night stand. So please forgive me, when someone tells you over and over they want to die and tell you they will and how, then walk around like they never did this, it can mess with someones head. It was not right.
2007-02-28 17:43:44 · update #2
The need for some closure comes from your expectations alone. Look within once you stop 'wanting' anything from this individual, you can walk away , be stronger, be objective and also might be able to help this person more. It is like you are on this roller coaster ride, but he is on another seat and you are on the other seat, you can see him but you both are still on the roller coaster. You need to get off the roller coaster to be able to asses the situation clearly. I don't mean to preach, just wanted to help. God bless and remember , "this too shall pass".
2007-02-28 20:14:42 · answer #1 · answered by Sam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do yourself a big favor move on this relationship is toxic and will bring you down it will sap your energie and be a waste of your time in a few years you will look back and say what the hell was i thinking so go out into the world and find your own true love someone that is there for you i promis if you close this door a new one will open and next time do not invest in someone who is already in a relationship with someone else good luck
2007-03-01 01:53:24 · answer #2 · answered by lorie v 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He fooled you emotionally, aperson who decides to suicide will never publicise about it. This person has a way of emotionally fooling people and making things happen his way from child hood days he gets pleasure in making impossiblitis happen in aparticular manner tillo he succeds he will never give up by hook or crook this is a psychic problem and it could be dangerous if its intense increases better forget him and thank god for the goodridance. Think want you spend with him was a dream and start living life in a new way. Trying to achieve him will lead you no were, it means more pain and selfdestruction, better forget him and kyou will leave a happy life. I dont see any future for lyou with this person.
2007-03-01 04:36:59 · answer #3 · answered by rema e 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy is screwed up and you don't deserve him. He certainly doesn't deserve you.
I hope that you didn't marry him.
Like all of us who misplace our hearts with unappreciative and ego-centric clods, you learned what you don't want and how to recognize a bottomless pit, before you venture in.
Your life is worth too much to spend any more of it on this one. You are only responsible for you. Don't take blame for what he does.
There is a wheel of pain: Victim, Rescuer and Executioner. It is not healthy to be anyone on that wheel, because the roles become each, in turn.
Enjoy the peace of a clear path.
2007-03-01 01:53:03 · answer #4 · answered by Charlie Kicksass 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not love him; neither does he loves you. However the animal instinct of male and female is doing the trick. You really want to defeat the other woman in terms of attraction from him. Accept that you love yourself first and the man next. Find a man who has crush for you. Love him and enjoy life. Forger this unworthy man. Control your EGO.
2007-03-01 09:26:19 · answer #5 · answered by joy bharat s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He showed his true colors. Find the courage to move on. Start moving on by getting your mind off all the details. Like Julia Roberts said in The Stepmother..."stay here and cry OR do something"...to move on that is.
2007-03-01 01:55:32 · answer #6 · answered by Over The Rainbow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no answer to his inexcusable behavior. Remember you are dealing with a very sick person here. Grieve your loss and move on. There is someone out there who will appreciate all your good qualities.
2007-03-01 01:53:43 · answer #7 · answered by starflower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll bet you she's feeling the same things you are. Have you considered that maybe he is playing you both against each other? Sounds like it to me.
2007-03-01 03:22:51 · answer #8 · answered by zaytox0724 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You deserve happiness not that burden
If it were me i'd just forget about him and change my number.
why go through all that really bad stuff, really awfull crap he is putting you through .
Let him go, be free
find someone who is interested in loving you for who you are.
2007-03-01 01:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by Sabriina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u helped him but he has no gratitude for that then why do u care bout that. just ignore him and move on with ur life.u should not waste ur time for someone who dont deserve your friendship.
2007-03-01 09:37:08 · answer #10 · answered by alekhya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋