I spent years of my life without crying. My family always comments on my lack of emotion, but the truth is I am so emotional that sometimes I worry that I am not normal. I have always hid it well. I cried alone a lot. However a few years ago, a friend of my passed away and it seemed to unearth this wave of emotions in me, and now I cry for every little thing. I can't take critisism with out crying. I cry during any argument...and the crazy thing about that is that I never used to argue because I found it pointless. I am a big cry baby and I hate it. I am 28, and the boss of lots of people, and I fear this crying thing is gonna get in the way of how people veiw and respect me.
I need my tough skin back and it is not happening. Anyone have any suggestions? Also, my favorite passed time, and part time job is teaching and training in martial arts and kickboxing. (Actually, it is one of the only places my feeling can get hurt and I don't cry.) So, I do have a stress reliever.
2007-02-28 13:29:59 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
oh, and I cry when other people cry, I cry when people on tv are crying or hurting, and I cry when I make someone else cry. (I work with kids...sometimes things get emotional and if we are dealing with a tough issue, find myself fighting tears. Luckily, I haven't bawled in front of them, but I know they have seen tears in my eyes. Plus when I have to discipline my neice...(shes my world) and she crys...we cry together. How horrible is that from a discipline perspective!
2007-02-28 13:33:01 · update #1
Get some more age behind you. things that used to make sad I now just say "next" and move on......
2007-02-28 13:36:11 · answer #1 · answered by conx-the-dots 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems like exactly like you said. (I know this sounds stupid, but hear me out) That after that incident, your emotions have just spilled over and are now flowing out of control... This could be due, in part, to the fact that you've held it in for so long. Give it some time, in this case, and when you can, cry it out.
Now, we should get to the root of your problem: your past. You said that you've always been sensitive, just never shown it. So can you remember something that you were really sensitive about when you were little (there must be something)? Why were you so sensitive to it? What affected you so much?
I can't really say much right now... I can't even ask much. You've given us a lot about your present, but the root of your problem is definitely in the past. Only when you find the root of the problem, can you effectively pull it out.
There is another possibility, though. Perhaps, instead of having an extra *something* that causes you to be sensitive, you are missing something that inhibits you from becoming sensitive...
Just another theory... the only way I can help you more is to talk to you in person... and since that can hardly be arranged, I say go to a place and get some help. Propose my ideas and see what they think of it. In any case, you should do some deep thinking about why you were so sensitive as a kid. If you want, you can always repost a question once you have something.
2007-02-28 13:52:44 · answer #2 · answered by Simplex Spes 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I cry all the time too. I see nothing wrong with it. To me crying is a coping mechanism. Tears are put there for a reason. Why some people do not tolerate people who cry is beyond me. I know how frustrating that is to hear. But, alot of people are more into themselves then they are other people. Your personality is the opposite. You have empathy and compassion for yourself and for others. As far as getting a tough skin what is it? I don't expect to be rawhide beef jerky of nothing. I am a human being and so are you. If you are crying more then normal you may be grieving.
2007-02-28 13:39:30 · answer #3 · answered by Don't Know 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I used to be that way when I was a teenager - sad about watching the news, for example, and seeing people hurt. It's funny how people can sense sensitivity - and usually use it to exploit a person. As a teenager I used to put up with a lot of crap because people could tell I was sensitive and caring... it's sad that people feel the need to bring others down to their level.
But, it worked. After putting up with crap from people for a while, and realizing I can't change the world - I just slowly, but surely, stopped caring. As the first replier said - just let age catch up with you. I'm younger than you (only 22), but have seen (and experienced) some bad things - it's hardened me up a lot.
2007-02-28 13:41:35 · answer #4 · answered by Bluefast 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is OK to cry. Anything in extremes is not. If you have some control and you can stop after a few minutes, then you are fine.
Sorry about your friend. Grieving takes a couple of years and often, longer, if you were close.
Crying along with the child after you've yelled at her, or perhaps, spanked her, is not necessarily a bad thing.
You are being empathic.
You didn't cry for many years. Discover the reason for that. That was not the average behavior for a child.
Now, you think you cry too much. Your emotions just have to level out.
2007-02-28 13:56:38 · answer #5 · answered by Charlie Kicksass 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
you're not alone. i feel what you feel. my husband and kids are laughing at me most of the time coz i just can't help being too emotional and sensitive over things. sometimes i think my friends think that i'm weird coz i'm just like that, i cry on little things and cry on sad things that happens to other people. i'm happy that i'm not alone. there's nothing wrong with it aside from the fact that we feel so much about things happening around us.
2007-02-28 15:30:53 · answer #6 · answered by Lola 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
All that 'tough skin' you had before may have caused emotional inbalances. Go see a psychiatrist just to make sure you don't have anything. It's nothing to be ashamed of, but also not normal behavior.
2007-02-28 13:54:48 · answer #7 · answered by Gina Chess 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you just need to get a solid mind set before you go into the situation. If the TV makes you cry, and you don't want to, change the channel. If you work with kids, niece included, know before hand what is and isn't acceptable behavior and response from you so you don't confuse them.
2007-02-28 13:42:56 · answer #8 · answered by piggletsmom 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Emotions is something that we have no control of. I mean, you can't possibly control or decides how you would like to feel. Same goes to our emotional reaction. It's something we have no control over.
That said, it doesn't mean it will stay this way for life. It's something that will eventually change as we grow older.
2007-02-28 13:44:47 · answer #9 · answered by Hornet One 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're doing fine, people always try to change others because they are afraid of those who are better.
2007-02-28 13:46:11 · answer #10 · answered by Scpwnz 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋