Why am I feeling so sad?

Question

Okay so, two years ago my Dad quit smoking...and we thought he'd actually quit, because he didn't smell bad or anything and his breath didn't stink anymore. But then a couple weeks ago my sister found cigarettes in his car. My mom confronted him about it and he admitted he had been smoking. My mom and sister didn't tell me until yesterday because I'm really sensitive about the subject(It was because of me he quit in the first place, I suddenly burst into tears, and he told me he'll quit). So anyways my mom and sister told me that he's a grown man and he can make his own decisions, but I still feel really bad. I was always "Daddy's Girl" and now I'm ignoring him and calling him "that man" but I still feel really sad that he's smoking again. He also doesn't admit smoking is bad for you and thinks that it's a bunch of lies and propaganda. How do I try to cheer myself up or try to convince him about smoking? At this point I'm really confused...

Answer 1

He is your father. I lost my father from lung caner last year...Love him for what he is! I was mad when my father started smoking again, but do you knwo what I would give to have him here smoking or not! It is an addiction and the only people you are hurting are yourself and your father. It wont change him bc it is his life. He will chose when to stop. Love him for who he is, not who you want him to be or who you make him up to be. Sometimes do you think of how hard it is for him to live up to what you expect him to be? Let him do it for himself. I hope this outlook helps you see that there are worse issues than this. TRY LOSING HIM! Then see how crappy you feel

Answer 2

Trust me, you are still "Daddy's Girls". If he could quit right now, he would! But smoking is extremely addicting. And when he saw that first tear drop from your eye, he really wanted to quit, for you! But I am sure he was caught up in the moment too. Im sure that night he was regretting that he told you that. As much as he would love to quit cold turkey, he cant. It is a long and tedious process. I know you are worried, smoking is very serious and dangerous to his health. But "nagging" to him about his addiction, is NOT the answer. He already feels bad enough. What he really needs is your support and to know that you love him and because of that you want him to be the healthiest he can be. Its not up to you to convince him about anything, just love him. Thats all you can do, he knows how you feel already. And smoking or not he will always love you too. You must understand that it is very hard to overcome smoking and some people never do, and to not base that on how much he loves and cares for you.

Answer 3

I'm sure your Dad tried very hard to quit for you. What you need to realize is that it is an addiction, a drug! He's most likely smoked for many years and is having a hard time quiting. You should feel proud that he tried for you. It could be he has slipped which is possible. Show him your love and respect . He is not smoking to hurt you and most likely feels terrible about it. Dad has a long hard road to travel and needs support not your scorn. I'm sure there are things you have done that have disappointed him, did he stop loving you? Did he call you "that girl? I think not . I sorry you're disappointed but think how he must feel. Go give Dad a hug!

Answer 4

If you truly love your dad, it's fine that you want him to 'quit smoking' but you MUST understand that you are 'just a kid' and that your dad is an 'ADULT' and that he 'can't quit' smoking for you or for anyone ... the ONLY WAY he can 'quit smoking' is because HE WANTS TO. Go and give your dad a big hug and a kiss on the cheek and tell him that you really appreciate him 'trying to stop smoking' for you, but you also need to tell him that you are 'old enough to understand that he must want to give up smoking for HIMSELF alone for it to 'work' and tell him that you don't 'like' him smoking, but that you do LOVE HIM ... and then just 'forget it' ... because you can't 'make' your dad do anything he doesn't really want to do, no matter how much you 'love him.'

Answer 5

Well, as long as you no smoking is bad, your on the right track. Feeling bad about your father is nothing but normal and I bet your mother and sister feel the same way. To help you feel better encourage your father to quit, and keep him going, support him. When you know you are helping him to stop, you will feel better. Also you can have some friends over to get you distracted. (but thats only short term)

Answer 6

I'm sorry i know what you mean my dad smokes too. He has smoked sense he was about fourteen and he had a heart attack about two years ago and almost died. But sadly we can't make them stop they have to stop on their own we can help them through it. I actually got in trouble for trying to make him stop I got all his cigarette boxes and took them outside and broke every little one and threw them in the garbage. But try this give him bubblegum maybe it might help?
Don't worry It'll Work Out In The End,
Miss Regulus Black :)

Answer 7

You can convince him to stop smoking by telling him what all the bad things are about smoking but if that does not work save your allowance money to buy him one of those smoking patches.

Answer 8

you are sad because you are shutting him out. Try to accept hat he has a problem with smoking. It's a bad addiction. Once you can accept this you will be better able to help him to quit. Mostly don't be so hard on him, and even moreso don't be so hard on yourself.

Answer 9

Go to the nearest drug-store and pick up some pamphlets on the hazards of smoking, present them to your dad...

that way you can back up your argument with science...

you're really sweet for caring about your old-man...

Hope my children turn out to be as loving as you are someday...

Answer 10

Sorry lass, it is his choice, you can not control him, just let him know that you love him and pray that he will quit. Only 16% of all smokers are diagnosed with lung cancer maybe he will be the other 84%, best of luck to you...