I married to this man and I really feel like he does not care about me>I do everything for him but it never seems enough.I probably deserve better but we have a baby together and I live in Texas from NY and have no where to go.My family and I dont talk anymore(long story) but I really need some advice and help if possible.
2007-02-28 12:36:17 · 9 answers · asked by Lexy320 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I cannot answer that question because that would be asking the impossible.
But your situation is a serious one and it should not be taken lightly. If this is your husband, then you should definitely talk to him about your concerns. The only way you will accomplish anything is to be HONEST and up front with him.
If you still think the same way after trying to work it out, then:
1) Stop thinking about yourself. You have a child to think about and as the parent you have the privilege of raising that child and teaching them the values that will shape the rest of their life. If your husband is not the example of a man, husband, or father you want your child to see, then get away.
2) Do not let your excuses stop you should you decide to leave. There are plenty of hotlines, shelters, THE INTERNET, that will help you find transitional housing, employment, and day care for your child all in an effort to help you make a life for yourself. Mabye you could use the opportunity to go back to school and really be the person you always wanted be.
3) Pray, Pray, Pray - whatever God you believe in - talk to Him and let Him lead you and guide you throughout your path and He will cause you to prosper.
I will pray for you too.
2007-02-28 12:49:18 · answer #1 · answered by fenway2k 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't make someone love you more. If you aren't happy, you need to talk things out with him. If he doesn't agree that he sees a problem with your marriage after you discuss this with him, then he evidently doesn't care very much about you or whether you are happy or not. Could be he sees you don't have family close by to aid you so he's not worried about you going anywhere. As far as not having family contact, that is a big concern! Is this family conflict back in NY due to you marrying your current husband? I would try to re-establish some sort of communication with one of your family. If you can't with family, what about a close friend back in NY? What about a church close by to where you live. They do offer counseling at many churches that can offer you guidance and in rougher times even financial assistance(a couple of bus tickets) to get back near family if it gets to that point. Just realize, no matter where you are (without family or close friends nearby) you are never alone. We have enough of a religious network in this country that no one that needs moral support is alone.
2007-02-28 21:01:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you got a hard one there but you could try to ask him if anything is wrong, seriously, you guys should sit down and talk this thing over maybe there are some things that bother the mess out of him and he has no way of telling you because he doesn't know how to and if you guys can't work your differences together I suggest you should see a marriage counselor and he'll give you more advice on this issue. trust yourself all the time..
May the force of life be with you always.
2007-02-28 20:44:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can not make him love you and respect you.. that is something that has to come naturally or it is not coming at all.. I say go get you a job and save up. You need a new start. Okay you have a baby with him, tell him you want him to be a father, but you need love too, and since he is not showing it BYE
2007-02-28 20:42:51 · answer #4 · answered by Shonda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your in a tough spot honey. I feel for ya, really.
Maybe you instead should try to talk to him, yeah I know...easier said than done...but Im serious.
You waste such precious energy coming here to find an answer when he is right there.
Since you seem to be at wit's end...what have ya got to lose?
Just be honest, and no name calling..no dramatics, just the facts with an honest open heart.
tell him you are feeling lonely and isolated. tell him that you're overwhelmed.
dont say "you" to him, it causes an automatic defense mechanism to kick in.
Say, "I feel so alone and isolated, and lost and I need your help"
Not, " I feel so alone and isolated, and YOU're not helping any"
Just my .02
2007-02-28 20:48:49 · answer #5 · answered by r.k. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you have to respect and love yourself. Stop acting like a doormatt and stom doing everything for him. Find an activity that you like and make yourself some girlfriends.
2007-02-28 20:44:20 · answer #6 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
all i can tell you is that you CAN NOT make a man do anything. he has to make that decision himself and if he hasn't then ....i don't know what to tell you. this is really your choice. i know you have a child and can't (or think you can't) go to your family, but if you are unhappy you have to make a move for the sake of your child, they can sense that unhappiness and believe it or not it takes toll on them. this is all on you kid, do what ypur heart tells you.
i wish you the best.
2007-02-28 20:42:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love and respect him back. Find God
2007-02-28 20:41:05 · answer #8 · answered by betrue 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is spoiled an he may never change...............i am sorry you are away from those that love an care for you
2007-02-28 20:42:35 · answer #9 · answered by bonnie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋