My brother wants a makeover... he gave specifics.. is he making good decisions? Should I stop him or help him?

Question

My brother is 14 yrs old.

He currently has brown, straight hair. He wants curly, dirty blonde(or a blonde that works with his skin) hair. He evidently likes my hair, but I'm not sure how to react.

Now, he wants a diamond stud in both ears. I'm not sure how I should go about that. It seems like an odd request, I've seen 1, but not 2 ears pierced on boys.

He plans to continue to wear khaki shorts, but he said he'd like to wear button down shirts and preppy stuff(currently he's somewhat geeky, so to speak). He doesn't want to be a poser, of course.

He wants to wear flipflops, which is new to me. He's never asked to wear them before.

He's already told me he wants to shave what hair(not that hair downtown) he currently has because apparently "it's something cool" for kids his age.

Please help and advise me!

Much appreciation!

Answer 1

If he wants to change his look, I think you should be sympathetic, besides, its not your choice how he should look. If he decides he doesn't like it, then he can change again, but for now, it may be good for him to try out a new look.

As for the earrings, in MN, its fairly common to see guys with both ears pierced.

Answer 2

Well, you certainly shouldn't stop him from making changes in his appearance, and you definitely should help him make good choices about it, if you feel you're experienced enough to do that.

Instead of trying to use the looks of yours he might like, he should probably try to capitalize on his own good points. For instance, straight hair isn't going to get curly very easily. I would advise against perming or body waving his hair. That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.

If he wants to highlight his hair, that sounds fine. Lots of guys do that. He should probably get it professionally done, though. There should be a local place that is reasonably priced.

As for the clothing, it sounds like he's only making minor changes, so I don't see any issue there.What's the deal with flipflops? Everyone wears flipflops. I don't see that it's unusual that he'd wear them (although it is a little unusual that he'd ask you if he could). If he really wants pierced ears, he might try doing it one at a time. And of course let him know that any stud he'll be wearing for a while is going to be the one they pierced his ear with.

I don't understand what you mean about the shaving, but most guys don't shave their legs or underarms, so I'd warn him that once you shave, it really changes the area for a long time. I'd leave it alone unless it's on his face. Which, if he's 14, it's probably not. You left out your age, too, which might be helpful to know, in terms of your experience with haircolor and treatment and piercing and shaving. And advising brothers! ;)

I also must point out that if you're just being yourself, you're never a poseur, even if you're trying something new.
Best of luck to your brother in his makeover efforts.

Answer 3

Well, I am in California, and there are a ton of guys who have both ears pierced, wear Khaki shorts, flip-flops and shave, it is not a big deal and you shouldn't give him a hard time for trying to express himself. This is an awkward stage in his life and you need to be there to support him, not point out his fashions.

Answer 4

He should keep his hair brown but curly. I've seen ghetto guys with 2 earings, but i don't think earings really go with the preppy look...
He should wear leather flip flops. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 5

Help him understand that looks are not as important as his attitude. People with great attitudes who dresses badly will stick out better than someone who dresses well but has a bad attitude. Dress conservative it is the safest.

Answer 6

i think he just wants to look different like the other kids in school instead of geeky i think you should let him try

Answer 7

i think you should deff. let him try it.. sometimes it's time for a change but i wouldn't do the flipflop