So my boyfriends 13 year old niece and I are really close. Recently she confided in me that she thinks she is gay.
At first I thought it was just a phase so it didn't really think anything of it but over these past few weeks it has become apparent that this is not a phase.
The problem is that her family is really strict. I am worried that if she comes out to everyone, she is going to let them know that I was the only one who knew. I know that everyone will be SUPER pissed at me for not telling anyone, including my boyfriend, but I'm trying to respect her privacy. Also, she feels really comfortable going into detail about things that make me SUPER uncomfortable but she is at the akward age and I know if I say anything she will get her feelings hurt and never talk to me about anything ever again.
Please help...
2007-02-28 10:16:18 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
If you think her family is strict, then she must think you are tolerant.
She NEEDS you, or someone like you. There's a confrontation coming.
In the meantime-
Be impartial, don't take sides.
Let her know that you don't need to hear details.
Oh, and give her a hug. Everyone needs a hug now and then.
2007-02-28 12:45:46 · answer #1 · answered by Alan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should keep letting her confide in you, and you are doing the right thing no telling anyone about it. The only reason you should tell someone is if she is doing something that puts her in danger. It is important for someone her age to have someone to talk to...especially since she is gay. Gay teens have a very high suicide rate, but you giving her an outlet, and a voice is going to make her strong and confident, and most importantly it is going to show her that there is no shame in loving who she is.
If you boyfriends family finds out that you knew about it...and they get pissed...they are the ones who are going to miss out on seeing what a great young girl she is. Whether she is gay or not. And if they are mad at you for it....let them be...would you rather be part of encouraging someone to be happy, or oppressing someone?
2007-03-04 09:24:49 · answer #2 · answered by LoveBats 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Don't tell others. She'll come out when she's ready. If anyone complains tell them you were respecting her privacy and end that conversation right there.
2. If she says something that makes you uncomfortable, you can either put up with it in hopes that you're helping her by allowing her to confide in you or you can take the chance and ask her not to go any further into that subject because it's starting to make you uncomfortable going that in-depth.
2007-02-28 20:08:13 · answer #3 · answered by carora13 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Given how the first assembly went, i'd avert spending the nighttime in any respect until eventually you've gotten to charm to close his kin extra appropriate... extraordinarily in case you've already made him conscious of the actual shown truth that it makes you uncomfortable. If he's were given a difficulty with that, then i imagine you want to take a lengthy confusing look at your relationship.
2016-12-05 02:02:13 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋