I need help for a paper: Can you guys tell me about ur marriage Experience?

Question

I need to interview a couple that has been married for 10years,,,,20 years....and a divorced couple....

PLease help me out!!

I actually do not care how long the marriage has been....

I just want different opinions and experiences from people that have been, are,,,,or are going to be married.

any experience will really help me out for this paper...thank you guys!!


I WILL REALLY APPRETIATE IT!

THANK YOU ALL FOR ALL YOUR ANSWERS!!....all the answeres helped me A LOT!

thx thx thx!!

Answer 1

well i can tell you about my parents and all the married couples i know

there seems to be a pattern in all marriages and that's that the first 5 years are really hard Cus you have to change your whole life for your marriage and you have to learn to swallow your pride

also i think that marriage is so hard and now a days when marriages hit a bump in the road its over i think that you have to work at it and it hurts sometimes and people will mess up but as long as there isn't abuse or infidelity then you can get through most things i also think that marriage is so important and so many people get married cus they just want to fill there wholes
what i mean by this is as we grow up we get hurt and disappointed and we get wholes in our lives that are caused by the pain life's brings us and when we meet someone with the same Problems (wholes) we connect and we feel its love when in fact its just that those two people fill each others wholes

and after a while the love that they thought they had actually starts to turn into hatred

take my parents for an example
both my parents were abused in all different ways
and my moms dad left when she was little so she grew up felling alone and like she needed a strong male figure to take care of her

well my dads family fought all the time and abused him and were so over baring and so loud and demanding that he grew up not ever being able to voice his opinion so he grew up wanting a calm quit person

well those two met and they just fit my mom wanted a strong loud tough guy and my dad wanted a passive quit girl so they got married and there problems came out and what had attracted them became the problem

but they really did love each other and and so they worked it out it took 22 years to get over most of there problems but they are so happy now cus they worked hard and they fixed them selves

but i think we all can save ourselves 22 years of unhappiness by making sure we are emotionally healthy before we get married

Answer 2

April will be 11 years. We have 3 kids. First year was just plain weird. It's tricky trying to get to know each other. 2-4 was pretty cool. Year 5 is tough. I don't care who you are. I've seen several of my friends not make it through year 5. We came very close to not making it through year 5. Year 6 is kind of a recovery year. If you make it through 5, you're better but your nerves are still a little raw. Year 7 and everything after just keeps getting better every year.

Major changes, have been different jobs, 3 different cities, 3 kids, 2 houses, loss of a few close (young friends) and some older family members.

The biggest change of all was accepting Christ. I became a Christian after year 5. And marriage now is 10000 times better. And I love her more everyday. I always thank God for her and my children.

That is my marriage experience.

Answer 3

we've been together for 10 years but married for 2 years. I have to say we have been through many different stages. But our most challenging stage i would say is when my "new husband" of 10 years, stopped being intimately interested in me. I would say it is not an age thing, and i did not get fat, or anything like that. I think he was going through a stage. I found out that alot of men and women go through a stage where they have no excuse why they don't want to have sex, and all they can say is that there is nothing you can do or say to help them, they just need to accept that they have already been with you so i guess the thrill is gone. I also would say that this was my biggest challenge so far, because men approach me to date me all the time, so to cheat or not cheat???? very hard. i eventually had to decide, so i decided to stick it out and see what happens, because i couldn't imagine my life with anyone else, and i would rather be alone or dead. I was sooo hurt. So far everything is working out again, i am glad i stuck it out. but that was my loneliest time because he's my best friend and has been since 1995. It is something that only a married person can tell you how hurtful that is, when the one and only person that you love, and of whom you've made this great commitment with, doesn't want to be intimately involved with you. we were like 2 roommates. i would cry all the time in private. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. correction; ;if i had a worst enemy that would be worse than death and yeah, i might wish that mess on them lol

Answer 4

i was married for over 4 years, technically. we were seperated for the last 10 months. it was fine at first, but then he started drinking (again--he had quit & had addiction counselling prior to us getting married) and he was alswys abusive when he was drunk, usu. just verbally, but a couple times physically & sexually. after divorcing him i reconnected with a few frineds and found out that the reason we fell out of communication was because he wouldn't let them talk to me, and he told me lies about things they said to discourage me talking to them. the guy was obviously a jerk! (btw, i was a housewife and student, he worked)

i am remarried now, for 2 1/2 months! he's so considerate and not the least bit controlling, though we do have some communication & trust issues we are working on, just to make everything perfect! i work full time (have a higher earningn potential), he's unemployed currently.

my mother & father are getting divorced right now--well, for the past 2 1/2 yrs. they were together since my mom was 14--she's 49 now. they were married when she was 16 because she got pregnant w/my bro. it was a 'traditional' marriage--she was the housewife, he was the provider. she did everything around the house (cleaning cooking landscape-maintenance) he did major projects though (building decks, etc). they didn't communicate well & were miserable, always fighting. but now my mom has no way to support herself and only gets $200 spousal support per month, has no retirement and no health insurance.

i hope some of that helped... you didn't say if there was a specific thing you needed to know about....

Answer 5

I don't what you need in particular , but I have been married for 37 years. When you are first married, don't go crying to mama everytime something goes wrong. Unless it is your lifetime best friend, do not belive gossip from anyone, it just means trouble. always try to remember what you love about each other and don't take each other for granted because you never know what will happen the next day to the one you love. believe me, that is so scary.In my experience it doesn't matter how long you've been together, it can sometimes get hard and you have just got to keep hanging on and wait the storm if you think it's all worth it.

Answer 6

ok lets see....... I got married when I was 18 yrs old right out of high school. My ex-husband (can't you see the outcome of this story already) has a twin brother who he was not about to part with, so we got a large town home. The home consisted of my ex, his brother, one of his friends, and me. It was a full house, and I ended up cleaning and cooking for everyone. After one year of marriage we decided to go back to his home land (not going to mention where) for vacation he left me overseas with his family while he went out drinking with his friends for about a month. When we came back I was already mentally moving on. He constantly went out with his friends, worked, and left me alone. I started moving on, and became supervisor of the company I worked for, and that’s when it happen. I met another man who treated me like a woman and I felt so wanted, a way that I hadn't felt in a long time. I didn't want to get seriouse with him, but I did want to leave my ex husband. I got an apartment and had too much pride to ask for help, so I ended up getting a little apartment in a bad neighborhood and slept on the floor for a while. I did see the man I met at work during some of that time, but that didn't last. My ex husband and I are still friends, but he does call me sometimes to see where went wrong with us. I don't rub it in, and I tell him that we both made mistakes. Hope this helps with your paper; it was kinda nice to tell my story.

Answer 7

My experience with marriage has been this-Do NOT ever get married under ANY circumstances. There is NO benefiet for the man at all.

All the benies go to the woman, and it is true-alamony, the screwing you get for the screwing you got.

Answer 8

best thing that I can suggest is to look at answers from other members , when you see an answer you like look at the other questions that they have answered . for my self your asking more then I could type here