i had an abortion over 10 years ago and i've always been honest with my partners about this but i've never told my parents. my close friends all know that i had one but i know they would never tell them, should i tell my mum or is it best that she not know?
2007-02-28 05:07:35 · 39 answers · asked by flojo 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
No, do not tell your mum. I was heartbroken when my daughter told me she did that. It is something that you will have to bare the burden over. Do not give the burden to your mum. One of the things that came into my mind was that I had failed her in some way because she felt she couldn't come to me, and I was overwhelmed with guilt. Another thing is she is not as young as she once was, and something like this could be very traumatic for her and could effect her health mentally or physically or both.
2007-02-28 05:11:30 · answer #1 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
If it was 10 years ago I do not see the need now unless you feel you need some support in dealing with things. What I mean is your mother is not going to gain anything from you telling her now and maybe it will make her feel a little sad because she was not there when you were going through this at the start, but this is totally your call and I wish you all the best whatever you decide.
2007-02-28 05:14:52 · answer #2 · answered by The Weird One! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont tell her as she will prob feel like a bad mother thinking you could of not confided in her 10 yrs ago. you have kept it away from her 4 10yrs so i dont think there is any point in causing unessersary upset. a friend of mine had an abortion last year and i was the only one and still am the only one that knew she wanted me 2 phone her mum while she was in hosp having the abortion but i wouldnt as i felt and still feel now it was never my place 2 break that 2 her mum. if you feel comfortable still not telling your mum leave it at that.
2007-02-28 05:24:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess it would depend on the relationship that you have with your mother. I firmly believe in telling the truth and being as honest as possible. The question you have to ask yourself is will telling her cause her any hurt? If she has strong feelings on abortion in general, this may cause her to be depressed or upset that she could have had a grandchild.
Of course this was your decision and you have every right to it. But keep in mind she has her own perspective on it.
Maybe in this case the quote "What you don't know can't hurt you.." is in order. I just don't want to see you strain your relationship with your mother. Good Luck.
2007-02-28 05:20:31 · answer #4 · answered by krupsk 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on weather or not you want to tell her. Its really your choice, what do you think she will say. She will probably be hurt to think you went through it alone without her. Maybe you should have a girly night and get a few bottles of wine down you and then tell. What ever you decide to do you are still the same person and it was a long time ago. Obviously it was the wright decision back then. Good Luck. x
2007-02-28 05:18:22 · answer #5 · answered by lou. c. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you be telling her to ease your conscious of not having told her before or would it be for a different reason? I ask because looking at it from an outsiders view I cant see what you would have to gain by telling them....perhaps only upsetting them and maybe some uncomfitable questioning. Maybe its best left i the past or if you simply have to tell them then do so. Goodluck with whatever descision you make
2007-02-28 05:32:52 · answer #6 · answered by doodlebip 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your personal business is that......YOUR PERSONAL BUSINESS. I don't see any reason to tell your Mum unless you are feeling compelled to. If you need to get this off your chest and think your Mum wont be too bothered/stressed with it, then do it. Another suggestion is you can go to your area priest and make a confession or your vicar. Honesty is great, but you don't have to tell someone if you don't want to about your own private decisions in life that have past.
2007-02-28 05:14:16 · answer #7 · answered by Mum to 2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have come to terms with the abortion and worked through all the issues that accompany one, then you may be able to tell her. If you have guilt or shame that has not been dealt with you may want to wait. If your mother is pro-life you need to be prepared for her reaction. I would pray a lot about this before you say anything.
2007-02-28 05:12:20 · answer #8 · answered by Tatochka 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you decide on parental consent, aside from in some states. in case you google it, there will be a catalogue of states and their rules on abortion. your state could properly be between the states that doesn't get carry of parental consent. you may additionally get it handed by skill of a choose in the event that they have not presented welfare for you or something like that, even nevertheless it fairly is all very complicated. So, it relies upon.
2016-09-30 00:34:55 · answer #9 · answered by intriago 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was 10 years ago-why bring up the past- as another user stated somethings are better left unsaid-besides it will probably hurt your parents and you don't want to cause them pain do you? If not then I would say just leave well enough alone.
2007-02-28 05:14:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋