i need guy help?

Question

please help me.. i know this guy since one crazy year. we have been having a long affair. i am still in love. he was too. but long ago started looking for other girls & going out. having fun. he also has got 2 kids (which he did hide from me quite some time - when things cleared then.. it had been too late - me in love - he probably a little bit too.. BUT FROM THIS DAY ON HE COOLED DOWN this affair step by step.. like he was trying not to get into love too much)

he lately told me i was the best thing, that happened to him in 2006.

he is too, for me, no doubt.

but he seems to avoid contact. why? any guesses from you, guys, why :-) we are still there for each other, sending messages. and trying to fix a date. but we don't get that far!! we both have too complicated lifes at the moment :-(

i am sad and angry. what to do. i can't get him out of my head. trust me, i TRIED ;-)

Answer 1

If you have to use the word affair, the whole relationship is screwed from the get-go. The sooner you move on, the sooner your life will actually start. You haven't "tried" to get him out of your head hard enough. It is going to hurt, breaking it off, but you will have more self repsect if you do. I am assuming of course that he is the one cheating on his spouse and not you.

Answer 2

First of all to get over some one you have to AVOID contact at all possible. There is a saying that if you set something free and it's meant to be it will come back to be. Okay so on the hiding the childrens deal this is the start of not being completly honest. Why hide it, it will come out anyway. So start by avoiding messages and calls. You need to clear your mind to start over.

Answer 3

1. You sound like a sweet girl
2. He lied to you not about his age but his kids, would he tell anyone else about you?
3. It sounds like your in a love affair and he's dating
4. If he really wanted to make a date with you he would find a way

I worked nights and my wife" then girlfriend" worked days. We made it work, Follow your gut instincts, there usually right, like when the hair on the back of your neck stands up. It's telling you somethings wrong.

Hope this helps

Answer 4

I think you answered your own question> we both have too complicated lifes at the moment .... let things settle down then if things are still good tell him you like to take it to the next level

Answer 5

WELL I HAVE BEEN IN THIS SITUATION ONCE B4 AND IT SUCKS THE GUY HID THE FACT THAT HE HAD A KID AN DIT PISSED ME OFF TO NO END....BUT WHAT I DID IS I WENT OUT HAD FUN AND GOT HIM OFF MY MIND IT TOOK A LIL BIT TO STOP THIKING ABOUT HIM ALL THE TIME....I JUST WENT OUR MET NEW PPL AND HAD FUN....AND HE ONCE SAID THAT I WAS THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED TO HIM ALSO AND WEHN I FOUND OUT THAT IT WASNT TRUE I FELL APART...BUT YOU CANT LET IT GET YOU DOWN B/C IT JUST TAKES TIME AWAY FROM YOUR LIFE AND IT SUCKS....SO GO OUT AND HAVE FUN MEET NEW PPL AND MAYBE YOU WILL FIND A GOOD GUY THAT WILL MAKE YOU FORGET ABOUT THE OTHER GUY THAT IS MAKEING YOU ANGRY AND DEPRESSED AND PISSED OFF.DONT LET HIM PLAY HEAD GAMES WITH YOU.

Answer 6

I know how it feels. I t is hard when you think you ar ein love with someine, to get them ou tof your head. First of all, remember that everyhting happens for a reason! We may not know that reason until we are old with grey hair with tons of grandchildren and great grandchildren, but there is a reason! Obviously he doesn't love you as much as you thought, if he kept his children a seceret from you. so, you need to think about that. Second, he is trying to break it off completely in a nice way. You noticed he was distancing himself little by little. Okay ohney, when a guy does that it's because he wnats it to be over. Since they don't have enough balls to come straight out and say it to a woman, th ejust figure they'll disappear! Third. Honey, you haven't tried very hard to forget about him if you guys are "still there for eachother, still email eachother, still try to set up dates with eachother, etc." You need to cut him off completely. The reason those dates, never become dates is because he doesn't want them to.Yes, it's going to hurt, it's going to hurt very much. But you sound like a very nice girl, and you deserve someone who is going to be completely honest, and open with you. Someone who is going to respect you 100%! And you may not think so, but that person is out there. There is someone for everyone! You need to tell yourself everday that you are beautiful, and you deserve better! Give your heart time to heal.Yeah, there ar egoing to be days where you want to call or write to him, just to say hi and /or see how he is doing, but don't do it! Find that strong powerful woman that you have inside, and bring her out! Go get a makeover, get your nails done, cut your hair, buy a new outfit! Pamper yourself, enjoy yourself! Don't let one man bring you down. Make yourself so beautiful that you have all of them turning ther heads to take a second glance! Enjoy your life. You are young, and have lots of time to deal with the everyday stress of man drama! Fin dsome friends and make an official pamper ourself day, or an official shop til you drop day! Forget about men! "We are women. They need us,we get along just fine without them!"