How to deal with a racist family?

Question

I want to invite one of my best friends to my family reunion and she wants to come but I'm afraid my distant family members will say something racist and totally humiliate me and it will make me seem the same way and I'm not! Most of my family is ok but some of them are horrible about it and rude and say stupid racist things! I want to continue to be her friend. We are close. What should I do? Thank you.

Answer 1

well just tell her exactly what u sad here that some of Ur family members a bit back ward.....it does not mean that u share the same point of view..........it is very unfortunate but it is truth there are some people like that.........if u r really that close as u sad than she will defiantly understand u and appreciate u been open and honest with her

Answer 2

Well first a family reunion is really for family. BUT if you still want to invite her the best thign you can do is probably to just tell her beforehand what it will be like. It may not bother her, she may just realize how stupid racist remarks make the one saying them sound and be able to just have a good inward chuckle at the speakers expense. If you do invite her you can share teh chuckle together, but since it's family it may be best to do what it takes to just avoid that type of situation, which sadly woudl mean not bringing your friend.

Answer 3

if you are close then you could explain the situation to her before hand, if she is prepared to chance a racist comment and come to your reunion all well and good, if she feels uncomfortable about it then she can choose to stay away, either way you have offered the invitation and can probably share a joke about the 'nuts' in the family tree!

Answer 4

talk to your parents about it, tell them about your concerns and see what they can do to help you. Maybe they can talk to your family members about keeping their attitudes in check during the reunion. If they don't, then i reccomend that you don't invite your friend over if your family is going to act like jerks....you don't want to put your friend in an uncomfortable position.

Answer 5

Tell your friend there are a couple racist people in your family, don't tell her which ones but tell her its only like one or two and to be prepared. This way she know's what she's going into and its not your fault they are like that

Answer 6

invite her out after the party with just some of the family maybe?... I had the same problem with my dad.. man alive was he mean about stuff like that..

I finally stopped inviting him over and told him why... we dont see eye to eye on alot of things.. but he under stood once I told him...
thats the best I can do for you...

Answer 7

i would not unavoidably use the term "racist". Your grandpa grew up in diverse cases of segregation. the place interracial dating or marriage wasn't tolerated plenty. So this is imbedded into his strategies and he's ignorant approximately different races. in case you like this guy, you may desire to no longer permit your loved ones provide up you. they could be against it in the beginning up, yet possibly as quickly as they be responsive to the guy and notice he's a stable guy. it may replace their attitudes in direction of race.

Answer 8

Give her a warning, My grandfather is very racist and I give everyone who comes over a heads up. They usually understand once I explain it.

Answer 9

i would ditch the family reunion all together. but if you have to go, don't drag your poor friend along and put her in that hostile environment... for gosh sake.

Answer 10

Apologize in advance for those people who might say something unappealing! Your friend should know by now, you are not responsible for the dumb things people say!