First, I'm not looking for stupid answers. Just some honest help. My girlfriend and I were talking about sexual history and I became disturbed by something in hers. I want to point out that I'm totally in love with her...this shouldn't affect us. But it is. I'm having trouble dealing with it. I know it's shallow, but I can't help that. That's why I'm asking. If you've experienced something like this, how'd you get over it? I want to get over it and I need to. Thanks for any help.
2007-02-27 23:48:50 · 4 answers · asked by MikeBrown 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I had a similar episode and I realized her past is her past like mine is mine.
2007-02-27 23:57:51 · answer #1 · answered by Moby 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I will never understand why guys do this. And it IS always guys. You know darned well that you are going to be upset if you find out that your girlfriend so much as looked at another guy before you, yet you insist on asking asking about the past and you ALWAYS get upset when you find out the details. There have been several similar questions here on Y!A and they all look like they could have been written by the same person.
Unless one of you is a virgin, you BOTH have a past sexual history. If one of you has had "different" experiences than the other, that's just tough. If you couldn't handle the answer, then you shouln't have asked. First of all, if you having this much trouble accepting something about your girlfriend's past life experience, then you don't love her. Period. Love is unconditional and it means acceptance. And this is something that you can't change, so why punish your girlfriend for it (which is what you are doing). Second, have you ever stopped to think that maybe she's upset over your past history? Or do you figure that you are somehow unblemished and sacrosanct because you are male? I would suggest just letting her move on to find someone else who will treat her with more respect, and you should find someone without a "past".
2007-02-28 11:19:15 · answer #2 · answered by badkitty1969 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You asked and she gave you honest answers. You have to accept the fact that we all do things that we aren't proud of and make some stupid decisions, but we learn from them and try to move on. The good thing is that she was totally honest with you so that should help your trust factor. The things you are worried about are PAST. Try to leave them there. You know the person she is today ...the person you love. Focus on what she is like now and the things that make you love her. Don't hold past mistakes over her head. She is with you now and has a different life and frame of mind. Stop digging into each others past. It's who you both are now and how you feel with each other that matters.
2007-02-28 10:12:28 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgive. If you really consider the meaning of what it is to forgive, you will see the ingenuity behind it.
2007-02-28 08:13:37 · answer #4 · answered by Jed 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋