"Spare the rod, Spoil the child"?

Question

Which category do you fall into ?

i Never spank
ii Pro-spanking
iii Wish we had not spanked

Or do you hold a different view?

Extracts:

Time: Should Spanking be banned
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1581853,00.html

ABCNews: Support for Spanking: Most Americans Think Corporal Punishment Is OK
http://abcnews.go.com/sections/us/DailyNews/spanking_poll021108.html

Discipline at Home: Spanking: Facts and Fiction
http://www.stophitting.com/disathome/factsAndFiction.php

Spanking Harms Children, Especially Girls
http://www.womensenews.org/article.cfm/dyn/aid/662/context/archive

To Spank or Not to Spank
http://www.elainegibson.net/parenting/spanking.html

Spanking: All points of views
http://www.religioustolerance.org/spanking.htm

Of Favorable reception towards Spanking – 18
Total Thumbs Up 91 Down 67

ABRIDGED
lapla.. – Exhaust verbal reasoning before spanking..difference between spanking and beating. UK’s laws are overly protective towards minors to the point of connivance that allows impropriety at school to go unchecked.

quack.. – “..a constant battle of wills and determination..Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is hereditary..”
:: Diet, medication, psychotherapy and a conducive environment may alleviate symptoms and root out the source of affliction. Above definition, spanking is certain to certify everyone a psychiatrist, if somewhat dubious.
“..from your kids.”
:: Drats. Really ? Just caught some off the screen by merely looking. Where is me eye ball sanitizer ?

KANGA.. – “SPANK..ALL THE WAY!”
:: Tut tut. Been to one too many school type parties in the City, have we ?
“..difference between spanking and beating, difference between spanking and abuse.”
:: Certainly. Is emotion likely to get the better of theory in application?
herma.. – :: As above sans school style party punishment.
Benny.. – Punishment followed with self reflection by the offender and parent-child discussion.
Debra.. – So long as there are rules to spanking.
Catli.. – Practise discernment on when and where to spank.
Watts.. – Discipline begins with externally enforcement.
zombie.. – Spank and hit without maiming or taking a life.

old_w.. – Spanking does not necessarily cause depression. It fosters respect, discipline and love.
bLuEe.., Confu.. – Turns out a well adjusted person able to distinguish right from wrong.
ronsw.. – “I usually deserve it..”
:: An opinion with candour. Question to Adults: Is this view ingrained from establishment or an independent thought sans adult or popular influence?

Corporal punishment as a measure of last resort:
♥Butt..; Angel.. ( Timeout before spanking. ); olsch.. ( For every action, a consequence: time-outs and warnings first. ); Steph.. (aka. Pink..), Vbryd.. ( Wrong when used excessively. )

Of Favorable reception towards other forms of edification 14
Total Thumbs Up 55 Down 50

ThePh.. – Spanking tends to escalate into beatings. This pattern of thought reinforces itself in punishment. In response, the child retaliates or seeks
physical affection in any form.
Gina.. – “.. it is because I have lost my temper..punishment is not directly proportional to the mischievous act.”

Thatm.. – Spanking fulfills parental desire to establish an order of authority, rather than an altruistic edifying intent for the child to realise and learn from impropriety. Corporal punishment is demeaning: are children and adults not humans and therefore be accorded similar respect ? Does force beget force ?

Mouse. – “Treat others as you would wish to be treated yourself.” The rules of spanking is a paradox of sorts when justifying use of force. Anger arises from the memory of hurt and humiliation, lingering longer after the act and serves to overwhelm the learning point of the offending incident.

Sexmu.. – Spanking is to be lazy in parenting. A child can be brought up well heeled without resorting to violence which is results from frustration.
Becca.. – Advantage of hindsight provides alternative views and solutions.

As_It.. – Circumspection by illustration to dissuade impropriety.
Karen.. – Threat of corporal punishment would suffice as deterrent.
Night.. – As above.

Other forms of Disciplining children exist:
Jazmi.. – “..other ways to discipline children..I am not against it..there are other ways.” :: To cherry pick, held in contention either for or against spanking.
Liz.. – Other non-physical ways of discipline exist.
Lost.. – Spanking is an out molded form of discipline.
AMAND.. – “Never spank.”

Hocke.. –
Head knowledge is different from application..punishment involves revealing consequences and engaging the child to explain the what and whys of impropriety and subsequent resolution..helps the child think things through before they act. I want my children to
- do the right thing because they know it is the right thing.
- to obey me because they trust and respect me.
Resorting to spanking shows a lack of
- patience
- thought on use of non-violent alternatives.
“My children are not my possessions..children and adults alike test boundaries because they are human..and are not rationalised equally.”

Last count as of 06 March.

RedSn.. – “Beating, however unpleasant, works..due to the lack of discipline..we have a nation of uncontrollable brats.”
:: It does appear a case of human rights gone awry.

Answer 1

PRO-SPANKING

I use every consequence in the book, I hold nothing back, that includes spanking. By tactics like time-outs, grounding, and multiple warnings not working, my children have chosen spanking for me, I just follow through.

Answer 2

I used to be a fan of spanking. Back when I had no children but knew everything there is about raising them.

Now that I actually have kids, I am of a new persuasion. I prefer methods of punishment that involve explanations of consequences and my child's interaction in explaining to me what was done wrong, why it was wrong and how it could have been done better. I find it much more effective when my child has a full understanding of what happened and what choices they had a choice from the beginning. Getting them to think of other things they could have done gives me the opportunity to discuss alternate consequences as well which helps my children know how to think things through before they act. Any one who tells me my kids don’t understand, are just plain wrong. Most kids deserve a lot more credit than they are given. There is a difference in fear and respect. I want my children to do the right thing because they know it is the right thing. I want them to obey me because they trust and respect me. I think that is quite a bit different than not doing the wrong thing because they are afraid of me. I know I'm bigger and stronger than they are. I don't need to prove it. I think that resorting to spanking shows a lack of patience to take the time, as well as, a lack of cleverness to think of any non-violent alternatives. The turning point for me was when I realized, my children are not my possessions, they are people. Society says that if your child throws a fit in the store, you are a bad parent that doesn’t know how to properly discipline them. I say, children will test the boundaries, not because they have bad parents, but because they are human. If you really think about it, you as an adult are not that different. Tell me you don’t push the speed limit. You’ll do it till you get caught, then you’ll do it again. Perhaps we should adopt flogging as punishment for speeding?

Answer 3

I am definitely not against spanking. It is however a last resort. I found a VERY good timeout method that works like a charm!! (on all 3 of my kids)

Answer 4

I was beaten on my 5th birthday because i took a sweet from a bin when my father told me not to.
I didn't do it again
Beating, however unpleasent, works and it is due to the lack of this sort of discipline that we have a nation of uncontrollable brats whommi would happily string up by ther £120 trainers.
I will beat my kids and the person who tries to stop me!

Answer 5

Pro-Spanking
Can the liberals not see time-outs are NOT working! My mom believed in time-outs, she took a time-out from what she was doing to spank my butt. Did me a world of good though I hated it at the time.

Answer 6

Pro-spanking.

I would always try and deal with things verbally but if a spank was needed then i would.

As others have rightly said there is a BIG difference between a spank and a beating.

If we in the UK had more back-up from law to spank our kids when leery or out of line we wouldn't have some of the loud unruly hooligans that plague our schools and towns. And if teachers had more control we wouldn't have all this diabolical behaviour at school...

Answer 7

I smacked my daughter on the hand when she was very small if she was sticking it into an electric socket or something but as she got older I used to count to three and if I got to three she would be punished, I never got to three as the tone in my voice would warn her never to push it that far. Now she's a teenager I threaten to take away her MSN or mobile phone, a fate worse than death for her!!

Answer 8

Never spank.

I've seen too many cases where the spanking escalates to beatings. Once a parent gets into that mindset, and the child continues to misbehave, as they usually do, either out of retaliation or because of a desperate need for physical affection in any form, they tend to adopt the attitude that the child misbehaves because he wasn't beaten long enough, hard enough or often enough, never that the punishment just isn't appropriate.

Better not to start.


Speak roughly to your little boy,
And beat him when he sneezes:
He only does it to annoy,
Because he knows it teases.

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6.
Lewis Carroll

Answer 9

I hate getting spankings but I usually deserve it so I guess I am pro spanking

Answer 10

When I was young, I was spanked and sometimes a little bit more (kicked). This only happened if I was being rude or disrespectful. I turned out ok anyway. It just helped me realize what was right and wrong. I will probably spank my kids when I have them but I think I'll spare the foot. My brothers and I were always so scared when Dad kicked us. So yeah. I'm pro spanking as long as it's just spanking and doesn't go any farther.

Answer 11

Pro.

I want my children to grow up with dicipline. Not go off the rails as I have seen around here where parent cannot/will not disipline their kids.

That said, only do so when it warrants that sort of punishment.