I've been in scouting for like 7 or 8 years now. But i'm 17 and i'm in Venturers. Anyway we got a new leader about 6months ago, he's always been really friendly towards the girls in our group. He's about 40 and married.
But we went on a camp in the weekend and he started getting far more dodge. Like he would comment on how nice my breasts look, infront of everyone. Also when me and one of my friends were sunbathing he would stare at us (my other friends saw him). He always tries to sit next to me and says how attractive i am etc.
I find him really creepy and I'm at the point where i'm to scared to go to Venturers.
I talked to my other leaders and they said they'd have a talk to him, but i don't feel that this is enough.
I've got some strong male friends at Venturers who have said they will look out for me (which they already do)
What should I do? I'm really scared of this leader!
2007-02-27 15:55:33 · 15 answers · asked by ★☆✿❀ 7 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
first of all hes not a leader, hes a wolf in sheeps clothing. second, he is drawn to you because of your fear of telling or objecting to him, he can smell it, your indecision. trust your instincts ALWAYS. nature gave them to us for a reason. the next time he does anything inappropriate, i would very loudly, confidently, clearly say (so others can hear and he knows you arent afraid) that he is totally inappropriate and that he needs to find a job far away from children since he has a serious problem with looking at their bodies that way! make sure this happens in front of a lot of people, and that they hear you. embarrass him. then you immediately go to the police, tell them what happened, tell them who wittnessed your outburst. you cannot let him go on like this, im sure he is hurting a lot more kids than you think. be strong, you are right and hes not. hes threatening you, defend yourself. i also noticed that you have not mentioned talking to your parents about it, probably because you know they will freak out and make it a huge deal....they should, and you should tell them right away. getting you to keep secrets for this creep is all part of him trapping you.
2007-02-27 16:23:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're 17 I'm not sure that entirely counts as being a pedophile (I'll let the lawyers answer that -- but you are nearly an adult so it's not like you're 12), but it's hugely inappropriate nevertheless, and you should definitely discuss it with another adult scout leader. That's not acceptable behavior. I'm 40 and I can't imagine ever commenting to a 17 year old in that manner -- much less if she were a scout and I were a scout leader in that kind of adult-leader capacity, trusted by adults to take care of the kids.
Maybe he's just somehow socially tone deaf and not a bad guy, but seems there is a risk there, and even if so he needs a bit of counseling at a minimum. Don't just say nothing and rely on your friends being available in a pinch -- if he's really a bad/sick guy that's too risky.
2007-02-27 16:07:49 · answer #2 · answered by KevinStud99 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well u shoulda already got scared or creeped or though something was wrong as he commented on your breasts
talk to everyone in your Venturers as u mention, somehow get the top authorities aware of this, have him be either removed from bein leader or something similar, and of course always be around grounds and NEVER alone wit him, don't let him knoe wat u're tryin to do to him , otherwise he'll find a cover when the time comes, and nothing will happen to him
2007-02-27 16:47:31 · answer #3 · answered by Zi-Shu 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, talk to your parents. Then talk to the other scout leaders again. If that doesn't work talk to someone at your school. I'm sure somewhere along the line you'll get someone's attention.... Until then just make sure you're not alone with this person. make sure there is always someone else around you.
2007-02-27 16:00:15 · answer #4 · answered by jessidawn_69 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
confirm you talk on your mum and dad approximately this. Sexual predators progression as in at first it could be basically looking even nevertheless it could become molestationor worse. Im no longer accustomed to scouts even nevertheless if there's a close-by chief or something touch them with the problem and have your friends who've witnessed this write a letter. additionally i could touch the police and enable them to be responsive to what has been occurring, additionally ask your friends in case you may supply the police their contanct advice too.
2016-09-30 00:15:22 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to report him to other leaders in the District or even the Council and when you do make sure you take someone who has been with you and seen how he acts toward you go. Do not by any means be alone with him.
2007-02-27 16:02:06 · answer #6 · answered by AC 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to quit Ventures until this man is gone and you have to notify your national organization that there is a man who is making participants uncomfortable. He already commented about your breasts, which I bet would be audacious enough to get him fired immediately. Don't worry about ruining his reputation or his marriage by coming out against this sort of behavior, he has no one else to blame but himself.
2007-02-27 16:01:18 · answer #7 · answered by Johnny 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I like how some dumb *** tried to correct your spelling with some bull **** spelling of his/her own. Anyway, I agree with most of the others: Talk to someone with real authority. Who cares if you're 17 and close to being legal; who knows what other ages he 'preys upon'...
2007-02-27 16:45:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask him for a few minutes of his time and explain your concerns and perceptions to him.
If nothing else you will have put him on notice.
2007-02-27 16:10:10 · answer #9 · answered by Mr realistic...believer in truth 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can look him up to see if he is on the sex offender registry just type in sex offender registry and whatever state u are in i would also tell your parents about it and have them file a complaint with the police because he sexually harrassed you and your a minor its a crime to do that
2007-02-27 16:00:49 · answer #10 · answered by tabethamarie2002 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋