How do u react when you found out your bf for 2 years lied to you 2 times?

Question

I've met my bf thought he's single.After 1 year,he proposed to me but he admit that day that he's married.I accepted it because he said they dont live together anymore and before he meet me their divorce is already on process.And his wife is aware about us.After 1 yr.we got engaged they still live together.Ofcourse,I am hurt and asked him why he lied to me?He said,he doesnt want to hurt me.I talked to his wife,and she said they really dont do anything anymore.And she wants to leave her husband too.Ofcourse,it is humans nature to get mad and angry if you found out your love of your life betray you.He said,I am not thinkin rationale,if he dont love me why he dont just get a whore and why he stick with me for 2 yrs?and he have enough money to do it?He asked me now that I know everything,if I can handle it?If not,he said he can't do anything anymore but to wait only for the annulment.What does he wanted to say about this?Do I still have to wait for him?Felt like he's givin me false hope!

The last time he came here is the time I found out he still with his wife.Ofcourse,I get cold bein with him and we fought a lot because I am hurt deep inside and I felt he betrayed me.Even he said,he doesnt want to hurt me,I know that would be his excused.When he went back to his wife,tried to break up with him and he said,he already dropped me since he left.But after that,he said sorry to me again.And I am stupid to accept him again.But now I am getting tired,I told him I hate him and not to bother me anymore.But then,just one call from him,I am fine again.How can I get rid of this kind of situation?He said,it hurts him that I dont trust him anymore and I am thinkin that because he lied to me,,he will lied again.He want me to trust and have faith in him and doesnt want me to ask about his wife because he said it reminds him about the time that he wasted staying with her.He wants me to be more focus but how?I told him if he can't let her go,I'll go and move on but he said I am crazy!

Answer 1

Sometimes, people feel the need to tell little white lies. Things like, "No, you don't look fat in that dress," or "This cheese soup is absoultely delicious!" Those type of lies are done normally to protect another's feelings or cover an embarassment.

The lie your fiance told you is NOT a little white lie. It is a huge, red, nasty, poisonous deception.

I would not be able to trust someone who had lied to me about something so major. Just think -- what else might he be lying to you about? Does he have kids that you don't know about? Major debt he keeps hidden? Drug problems? STDs? How can you take his word for anything?