my friend has a retarted brother but i dont think he knows i know and i dont know what to say when he finally tells me
2007-02-27 14:04:15 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Well I don't think it should matter because even though he's retarded, he's a person with emotions and needs just like everyone else. I don't know to what degree he's mentally retarded but none of that matters. It may take more time and understing from his immediate family because they take care of his brother and love/live with him. I think You should act natural if he ever mentions his brother. Maybe he doesn't feel like it's something that he necessarily points out to you. So what if he's brother is mentally retarded, what does that have to do with your friendship? I don't think you should worry about it so much. There's not a proper way to act or not act...just be understanding and accepting, just like you would if he had a brother that wasn't mentally retarded. It's ok.
2007-02-27 14:10:18 · answer #1 · answered by Jade D. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to reposition the focus here:
Wow your friend has a brother with a life altering situation. Things are probably not the norm in his home. He probably feels selfconcious and probably a bit protective of hi brother who he probably loves dearly but is afraid of how other's will judge.
If you are truly a friend like you say you are - you'll welcome this life difference with grace and humility.
Ask you friend if you can meet the family; if/when he brings up his brother - say, I 'm aware of that and ask simple questions like; is there anything I should know before I meet him so I don't make him feel uneasy? I think your a wonderful friend and would like to accept each member of your family as a friend as well.
Don't let this life difference have any negative or shallow affects on you - his brother is a part of him; is human; is just simply different. Don't ever think that just because people are diffent they shouldn't be given respect that we all want.
Sadi
2007-02-27 22:18:58 · answer #2 · answered by Sadi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would ask him to describe his brother to me. This person is STILL your friend's brother, regardless of what disability he has. It's not like you're going to be unkind and say something mean to either one of them. This brother is a PERSON. Your friend introduces you to his brother and you greet him just like any other person.
Some disabilities are very minimal while others are very significant. Most of these people are the most kind and gentle folks you will ever meet. They are so completely genuine because they are incapable of doing otherwise. Sometimes a person may ask a very personal question, merely because they want to know, not to embarrass you. Realize that they may relate to you as a little child would - very simply. Just try to give the person an answer that they can understand while still respecting them. Your friend will be very appreciative of the kindness that you show to his brother.
I would NOT offer condolences to your friend. The whole family is probably trying to relate to this person for who he IS, not for who they wish he would be.
2007-02-27 22:16:22 · answer #3 · answered by Thomas K 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just ask your friend to tell you more about him. If my friend had a retarded brother, I would hope to get a chance to meet him.
If you haven't been around retarded people before, just say so. And if you do meet him, ask your friend if there is anything you need to know to get along with him. Just be friendly. Retarded people can be anything from really disabled (like a baby) to so high-functioning that you might not notice if you met them. Sometimes they have physical differences and sometimes not. But they are just people with feelings and personalities like the rest of us.
2007-02-27 22:44:43 · answer #4 · answered by The First Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't do anything. I don't think he'll tell you, anyways. Most mentally challenged children don't even know what's wrong with them, so he most likely won't be telling you that he is. Just forget about it. It's not a big deal, so just let it go. There's nothing you can really do.
2007-02-27 23:10:13 · answer #5 · answered by Abby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing. Whats wrong with it?
They will tell you if they want, they may already think you know.
Whats the real question here?
2007-02-27 22:07:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say "OMG I NEVER KNEW THAT! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME! I FEEL SO BADD!!!"
2007-02-27 22:07:25 · answer #7 · answered by Rai 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just say wow i am sorry...
2007-02-27 22:08:17 · answer #8 · answered by FairyPrincess 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
DUH are YOU retarded? Does it matter?
2007-02-27 22:07:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋