im working for a firm and i was very close to my employers. They have been living together for 25 yrs and are very nice and share everything with me. they are old couples and are always there for me when i need help. I thought that they were in love and have never hurt each other. But recently i found out that they have been cheating with each other, and still satying together. Now my problem is that i was hurt when i found out about them and once again i couldnt judge people. Im very hurt and need advice because i cant work there anymore.
2007-02-27 09:12:30 · 8 answers · asked by ranigii 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It's disappointing to have role models and be let down by them, but you have to learn to adjust in some ways.
I will tell you this, every couple has their secrets. You will NEVER find an old couple who have been together for a long time who "are in love and have never hurt each other". The nature of marriage just doesn't allow for that possibility MOST of the time.
The weird thing is, they may know about the cheating, and really not be hurt by it. This doesn't necessarily mean what they're doing is right (I dont' think it does), but it's not totally unheard of for an elderly couple to love each other in the way two people who have lived together and shared a life for a half a century would love each other, without there being any romance or sex appeal anymore.
Personally, I don't think you should quit your job over their infidelity. You're going to have to get used to people you disagree with, or who you don't respect, in the workforce. Find a different mentor, or even tell them what's on your mind, but you're bringing personal life in in a way that will make it difficult for you to function in the working world.
This is something my mom told me once, and it pissed me off when she said it, but now I see that it's true: dont' make this all about yourself. The problem is between them. You may have lost respect for them, and that's fine and understandable, but your'e turning it into a "they cheat on each other what am I going to do" thing, and... well, it's just not about you.
I hope you can work through this, and that you feel better soon.
2007-02-27 09:35:45 · answer #1 · answered by CrazyChick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think you were judging them. you just assumed. and i would assume that also. they obviously have some marriage problems. for example, you said they were old. maybe they just decided that it wouldn't be much of a difference if they got divorced, so they decided not to care. I'm assuming this also, and it was just an example. so I'm probably wrong. but theres no reason to be hurt. after all, maybe they didn't want to embarrass themselves. it is a bit embarrassing if they come out and just say that they have been seeing other people but are still staying together:)
good luck on your problem. and if you really like where you work, i don't think you should quit. it is quite hard to actually like where you work.
2007-02-27 09:27:03 · answer #2 · answered by Kodak Moment 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see that you weren't ready for the real world to hit you square in the forehead.
Some people actually think and are successful at an open relationship. They realize that it human nature to want different flavors at times. The lack of this "variety" can actually cause stress to build and break down a relationship.
It's like the cliche...
Set something free, if it comes back, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was.
Well, they set each other free regularly and because each of them comes back, they have no worries of jealousy and other destructive emotions.
2007-02-27 09:26:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i assume the simplest thank you to make a determination on despite in case you're doing proper or incorrect is to ponder whether you will possibly like it performed to you. If the respond is not any then do no longer do it. The nasty mindset works with the comparable concept, if its no longer style do no longer do it. there is an old asserting, by no potential look down on each person until eventually its to help them up. wish those could instruction manual you and good success
2016-12-18 12:03:59 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Their love life has nothing to do with you. I have no idea why you are hurt. Stay out of it and keep your job
2007-02-27 09:22:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're just being over-sensitive. It's none of your business as to why they're splitting up. You have absolutely nothing to do with it. That kind of stuff just happens in life, so just get over it.
2007-02-27 09:22:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a job. Their love life has nothing to do with you.
2007-02-27 09:18:57 · answer #7 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can identify, if it bothers u that much then just quit. & tell them why.
2007-02-27 09:36:09 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋