Dad is supposed to take both his sons every second wkend.
He won't take him along anymore because he (3 years old) breaks his heart (?)... more specifically to control me.
I do not want to lie to my son but also, I don't want him to get hurt and feel rejected. What should I tell him?
2007-02-27 06:44:32 · 18 answers · asked by Shaana 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
what about my oldest (7 years old)... won't he be psychologically affected not to see his dad?
2007-02-27 06:51:15 · update #1
i wouldn't force him to take either one of them. if he is using them to hurt you then he doesn't deserve them. he will be the one to pay in the end.....trust me. been there done that....
2007-03-07 03:30:05 · answer #1 · answered by txO3blueeyes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your 3 year old probably can't take care of his self as well as the 7 yr. old. However I do believe by your husband NOT taking the younger boy he is intentionally tying your time up so that you won't go out and have your time with friends, I believe it is his "strategy" to do this to you. I really doubt that you can do anything about it legally. You will just have to ride out the storm and hope it changes in the future. I believe I'd tell the ex that if he doesn't want to take the younger child then that is totally up to him. Just go ahead and find a relative to sit with the boy and tell your husband what you are doing and be sure to let him know YOU ARE GOING OUT TO HAVE A GOOD TIME. Bet he doesn't like that and will find another way to get back at you and try to control you. Good Luck.
2007-03-04 11:06:57 · answer #2 · answered by andyt 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is down right cruel, at the little boy's expense. Does he know the damage he is doing to his son mentally, or is he that evil that he doesn't care? I would be contacting your Lawyer, and going straight back into court on the grounds of mental abuse. If he doesn't watch out, he may lose his visitation. Make sure you write down everything. Their must be some kind of "group" out there to help with such abuse of a child-from a husband. I agree, if he doesn't take both, he doesn't take anyone!
2007-02-27 06:57:09 · answer #3 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Had the same problem. My ex would always take my son because he was older and not my daughter. Mostly because it required additional work in his part. I let him know that he was not to seperate them. if he took one he'd have to take the other. Then go down and petition the court for custody. The will give you court ordered visition and he can get in a lot of trouble if he doesn't adhere to it.
2007-03-07 02:39:01 · answer #4 · answered by Shareen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jerry C got it right. Right now though I wouldn't pressure Dad in taking the three year old, it is probably best he doesn't. Spend some one on one with the three year old, it is Daddy's loss not his. Don't mention a thing to Daddy about taking him back to court. Let him get the notice in the mail. He does have his nerve....doesn't he?
2007-02-27 07:02:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, im from a divorced family, and let me say the kid doesn't all ways want to allways see the parent!
it's hard to believe but it's true. so if the dad doesn't wan them then it's more time for you and your kids to be together.
it's the dad who is loosing out. im sure u have a close friend that is a man that can be thier fatherly figure. the kids should visit thier father some, just so they know who he is. and you can help with that.
NEITHER you nor your kids should come to hate the man. God says that to hate is wrong. show forgiveness to him and let him know that he's the one who is loosing out on being apart of his childrens lives
2007-03-07 06:44:25 · answer #6 · answered by Layla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
FIRST!!! Document his refusal to take the three year old. See if you can get someone to video tape his refusal at least twice. Then let him see a copy of the video tape and tell him if he does NOT start treating both of his children with love will will go to court to see what can be done. Suggest that if he can't be bothered to take his three-year-old, he will be required to pay $5.00/hr for your "babysitting".
2007-02-27 06:51:31 · answer #7 · answered by Bobbie E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF HE WAS ANY KIND OF REAL FATHER, LEAVING THE 3 YEAR OLD WOULD NOT BE AN OPTION. I HAVE A 3 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER AND WOULD NOT TRADE ANY OF MY TIME WITH HER FOR ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. IF YOU WANT MY OPINION ANYONE THAT COULD DO THAT HAS NO BUSINESS BEING A FATHER TO ANYONE. I WOULD TAKE THIS TO COURT AND NOT LET HIM HAVE EITHER ONE. YOU SHOULD TRY TALKING TO HIM FIRST BUT BE FIRM. IF HES NOT THE TYPE TO LISTEN THEN GO AHEAD WITH COURT PROCEEDINGS. ITS NOT GOING TO BE FUN FOR THE KIDS BUT NEITHER IS BEING LEFT OUT.
2007-02-27 06:53:12 · answer #8 · answered by Jerry C 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
much better don't let him out with his dad if this one is incapable to watch over him, or unwanting.
Maybe he feels incapable to take care of two children at the same time.
For this, you better tell him he should pay a nunny for those hours in which you need some space too.
2007-02-27 06:49:26 · answer #9 · answered by ParaskeveTuriya 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dad probably has a new fling. If he is doing this to hurt you go to court and make him pay the cost.
2007-02-27 06:51:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him your going to take him to court to increase your child support becouse he not keeping to equil coustody time and child care is going to cost you money also tell him your going to sight him for child neglect and emoshional abuse.Let him explain it to the judge dont let him make you be the bad guy to you kids,you dont need to explain anything to your son when your baby ask about daddy tell him honey i dont know why dont you ask him?
2007-03-04 20:38:47 · answer #11 · answered by christine h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋