1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is , where is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2 People who are willing to search the entire room for the TV remote bcos they refuse to walk to the TV & change channel manually.
3 When people say "you just want to have your cake & eat it" Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this?
5 When people watching a film say "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid £6 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor
6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"..Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya
7. When something is 'new &improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then here has never been anything b4 it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something b4 it, it can't be new
2007-02-27 05:44:32 · 24 answers · asked by Shy Ted 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
8 When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?
9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come
yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?
2007-02-27 05:44:58 · update #1
I agree and I love your sense of humor!Thanks for the laugh-I needed it.
2007-02-27 05:50:06 · answer #1 · answered by Urchin 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is , where is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? ! This reaction is controlled by the brain and you have little to no control over it.
2 People who are willing to search the entire room for the TV remote bcos they refuse to walk to the TV & change channel manually. ! Why get up and down if you channel hopping, if you get the remote it will save moving every two seconds to change channel.
3 When people say "you just want to have your cake & eat it" Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? ! It is a saying, has nothing to do with cake.
4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? ! Means to look in a place that you should have checked first. It does not mean to continue looking after you have found it.
5 When people watching a film say "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid £6 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor. ! You were over charged for £6 ticket.
6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"..Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya. ! You have the choice not to answer the origanil question.
7. When something is 'new &improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then here has never been anything b4 it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something b4 it, it can't be new. New does not have to be new invention, just never been seen/used/heard of before, and improved means it does something the old one did.
2007-02-27 05:53:28 · answer #2 · answered by chris s 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Hey - you should write a book! There's already a similar book called 'Isn't life sh*t' - perhaps if you think up a few hundred more points you could write a new and improved version?
Can I ask you a question? Have you just broke up with someone who had those habits?
Hold on a second, I've lost my remote control again - perhaps it's at the last place I'm going to look? Can I ask another question? What happens if I look there first, then after I find it I continue to look other places just for fun.
Ah - well, good luck with the book. It'll probably be hard work.
2007-02-27 05:57:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
1. Not a good reason to hate someone.
2. LOL. Your TV/Remote system is badly designed. A good design would put a button on your TV that you could press, tha would make the remote make a beeping sound.
3. Cake can be decorative.
4. Yup!
5. I had my head in my Enormous Gulp. Can't see around the cup, it's so huge.
6. Yup.
7. LOL.
8. You can build something that will last beyond your life expectancy.
9. I live in Los Angeles. At the bus stops, many different buses stop, going to different locations. Asking "did the bus come" is indeed retarded. Asking "did the 81 bus come" is just fine.
2007-02-27 05:55:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
To continue this tribute to George Carlin:
George Carlin's New Rules for 2007
New Rule: No more gift registries. You know, it used to be just for weddings. Now it's for babies and new homes, graduations, and releases from jail. Picking out the stuff you want and having other people buy it for you isn't gift giving, it's the white people version of looting.
New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for Classmates. com! There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.
New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: “LUCKY BAST***S”.
New Rule: If you need to shave and you still collect baseball cards, you're gay. If you're a kid, the cards are keepsakes of your idols. If you're a grown man, they're pictures of men.
New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.
New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket
- water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored water is called a soft drink. You want flavored water? Pour some scotch over ice and let it melt. That's your flavored water.
New Rule: Stop ********** with old people. Target has introduced a redesigned pill bottle that's square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time Grandpa figures out how to open it, his *** will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.
New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the a**hole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low and one NutraSweet," ooh, you're a huge a**hole.
New Rule: I'm not the cashier! By the time I look up from sliding my card, entering my PIN number, pressing "Enter," verifying the amount, deciding, no, I don't want cash back, and pressing "Enter" again, the kid who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy.
New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ***. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.
New Rule: Competitive eating isn't a sport. It's one of the seven deadly sins. ESPN recently televised the US Open of Competitive Eating, because watching those athletes at the poker table was just too damned exciting. What's next, competitive farting? Oh wait. They're already doing that. It's called "The Howard Stern Show."
New Rule: I don't need a bigger mega M&M. If I'm extra hungry for M&Ms, I'll go nuts and eat two.
New Rule: (and this one is long overdue) No more bathroom attendants. After I zip up, some guy is offering me a towel and a mint like I just had sex with George Michael. I can't even tell if he's supposed to be there, or just some freak with a fetish. Don't want to be on your webcam, dude. I just want to wash my hands.
New Rule: When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to know in months, as in "27 months." "He's two," will do just fine. He's not a cheese.
2007-02-27 05:52:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
OH MY GOD these are really the most frustrating things in life and i usually face more than one everyday they put me in hell coz i have many more important things to do than answering these things ... what i liked most is When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this?
thats true why would i keep looking you crazy!!!!
2007-02-27 05:50:35 · answer #6 · answered by dimaabdin 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ha! Like the remote control one.
Here's another one, when I'm in bed and I need to get something just out of my reach I'll lean most of my body out have one leg on the floor, so that in the end the only part of me in the bed is a bit of leg and foot! I nearly fall out of bed in the process....anything rather than actually get right out of bed!
2007-02-27 05:51:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Lighten up. These things happen to everyone... and they don't hate it in people. I would think you're over it by now gracious haha.
2007-02-27 05:52:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I'm sat ere laughing at all 9 of those.........however, I AM GUILTY of most of them!! LOL
2007-02-27 07:08:44 · answer #9 · answered by SonicSon 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL that was hilarious i totally agree with you. But i have to admit i am guilty of quite a few of those things, but i think that i'll alter my ways now!
2007-02-27 05:52:15 · answer #10 · answered by Zaina 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
O.K sounds like ya let alot of lil things get to you you just need to chillax there is alot more serious things that get on my nerves.
2007-02-27 05:53:03 · answer #11 · answered by chica 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋